Do you think parents should get first dibs on the cool gift for kids?

Rebekah1021

DH and I really want to get DD a big girl bike for her birthday. I am going to check them out tomorrow at TRU and if I find something I like, I might just get it. DH told me that his parents want to get DD a bike and that I should ask them if they are going to get her one before I buy it. I think that I can just get it because they haven't said a word to me about it.

Is it wrong of me to get the reaction I want from a gift that we gave her? I told him that I want the bike to be from us.

happy_momma

I'm kind of territorial about stuff like that, but I have lots of people say I'm ridiculous for being that way.  And it would never occur to my ILs to inform me (or DH) ahead of time about a big gift they are getting. (My parents would, though.)

W&J'sMommy

If it's important to you, then yes.  I'd just tell IL's you already got her a bike and give them an idea for something else (maybe the helmet?)

 

Rebekah1021

happy_momma:

I'm kind of territorial about stuff like that, but I have lots of people say I'm ridiculous for being that way.  And it would never occur to my ILs to inform me (or DH) ahead of time about a big gift they are getting. (My parents would, though.)

I'm the same way! My inlaws always get huge stuff and never ask us about any of it. My parents ask what they can get for her.

Mrs Manners

I really don't care about stuff like that. I'm thrilled if my parents want to put up the cash for it. It means I get to spend money on something else I want him to have.

pincushions

Mrs Manners:

I really don't care about stuff like that. I'm thrilled if my parents want to put up the cash for it. It means I get to spend money on something else I want him to have.

this.

Unfortunately it usually isn't a bike but an expensive toy that is not age appropriate.

Mickschick

Yes. I think that you should go ahead and get the bike and then your DH can tell them that you got one. If they say anything to him he can tell them that he forgot to tell you and that it's really important to you that the bike be from you guys. Who cares what they think; they got to have that with their kid(s) why shouldn't you? My Mom always asks/tells me what she's getting for the kids and DH's family (who isn't super close with us b/c they are old and were never close with us, DH's Dad is 82 and his sister is 50) just give the kids money and then we buy presents for them. It's so much easier that way.

DandelionMom

There are a couple of things I was territorial about.  Like I wanted DH and I to build their dollhouses (but the dollhouses were from Santa) so I asked all the family not to do anything dollhousey that year.  I think it is fine to have some things you want to do and if you have really generous families, you have to give them a heads up. 

jnicks19

I'm with you.  I want to get the cool gift!  You could always give some suggestions of other things you'd think she'd like.  I would tell them you already have it!

oparcm

I understand your frustration but I so wish I had that issue.  My dd does not have one grandparent that ever thinks of getting her something that she'd like.  DD really doesn't get much from IL's.  last year it was a pair of socks and a towel. 

Sahara6971

All I know is that it must be nice to have grandparents that want to buy for the kids. My mom is gone and my dad is clueless. DH's mom just doesn't buy them anything for whatever reason...

MrsCali_Bride

I think parents should definitely get first dibs on the cool gifts.  I've actually made sure to mention in passing what big gifts we plan to get for C in hopes that they take the hint and get him something else.  So far we haven't had any issues and have been able to buy him the gifts we've wanted to but who knows when that will change.

Ciarrai

Yes.  I think parents have dibs on the best gifts.  I think Santa has dibs over parents.  It pisses me off that MIL always tries to outdo Santa for Christmas (and us for birthdays).  Tell your DH to call them and tell them that you're already getting her the bike.