Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

Now I can post here

The last time I posted, I wasn't sure if I was m/c-ing, and was told (in the kindest of ways) to not post here if I was still pg and not sure.

 Well, I'm sure now.  I'm m/c-ing... HCG dropped again to 367 (from 421) and I just started to bleed.  I'm not sure how all this will work; the nurse said to expect a heavier AF, and probably some cramping.  But if I had a lot of pain, I am supposed to call the office. 

I wish I wouldn't have gotten so excited so soon.  Now I feel like a bit of a failure.  The nurse tried to be reassuring, telling me that most women don't even know they are PG at the point where I am at, but that wasn't exactly reassuring.  I knew I was PG, and I know that I'm losing what could have been our baby. 

I am just numb right now, but I have to finish the workday and try to be "happy smiley" for my clients/patients. 

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Re: Now I can post here

  • I am very sorry for your loss.  There was nothing you could have done to prevent this so try not to beat yourself up too hard!  However, I know that is easier said than done.
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  • Sorry you are going through this. It is difficult no matter how far along you are. ((((HUGS)))))
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  • I'm so sorry for your loss. I will be sending my thoughts and prayers your way.
  • I am so sorry. It is never easy regardless of how far along you are or aren't. It just sucks...

    I would receommend a heating pad and some OTC pain meds. For me, it was sort of like a heavy AF.

    On a side note, don't feel like a failure. None of us ever wanted this for our little ones. You didn't have a choice in the matter.

    Big ((((hugs)))))

  • Me too.  I prayed and prayed that the number would go up, even a little, to make me feel better.  I was so excited on Saturday when I found out ... like tears of joy and all...and in less than a week, it's all over.  And even if anyone says it's just a ball of cells, it was MY ball of cells, and I wanted it to grow into a strong, healthy baby -- just like all of you do too! 

     Not many people knew I was pg, but some at work did because of the risk of radiation & gas anesthesia.  It is so hard to tell them "nope, it's not happening now."  I even had another doctor step up to do a chemotherapy injection for tomorrow (because I didn't want to push those kind of drugs being pg), but now I'm not pg, and I feel like I should do it...but that would probably clue everyone off about what is going on, and I just don't want to talk about it to everyone. 

     DH says "we'll try again."  And I know we will, but it doesn't make it any easier for me right now, right this very moment, when all I can think about it trying to figure out the "why"  that I'll never know. 


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  • I am so sorry for your loss.

     I felt exactly like you did- a complete failure. Finally after 2.5 months (it still hurts like crazy), I am okay with saying out loud that it was not my fault and maybe I am not a complete failure afterall.

    Even though you were in the early stage of pregnancy (like I was), it was still a baby inside of you!  Don't let anyone let you think differently.

    Again, I am so sorry you are going through this.

  • I'm so sorry for your loss.
    BFP 4/23/09. D&E 7/17/09 16W5D. BFP #2 3/10/10. EDD 11/15/10 Babycakes was born 11/5/10! Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I'm glad to see you posted here again.  I hope you will find comfort and a shoulder to cry on here with these amazing women...I surely have.

    Again (I also responded on GP)--I am so sorry for your loss.  I know the feeling of "failure" and I also feel a sense of embarrassment that I let myself get so excited so quickly. 

    The bleeding was the hardest and as of today, it has stopped (I had 4 or 5 days of spotting after 2 of heavy bleeding).  It will get better--everyday is getting easier for me, but it is still constantly on my mind.  Try to find things to distract you--funny TV has been my savior. 

    We're here for you, papetvet! 



  • Im so sorry for your loss. Do you really have to be at work right now and tmrw? Work was so hard because I just wanted to be home with DH or with my close friends. Get some rest, a heating pad, some OTC pain meds and dont hesitate to call in if you need some prescript pain meds either...and some ice cream.

  • I'm so sorry. I hope this ends quickly for you and you're not in much pain. Please don't feel like you're a failure. These things happen to so many of us, and it's nothing you did wrong. I felt like it was all my fault, but it's not!
  • I'm so sorry for your loss... hoping you heal quickly.. you will find a lot of support here.
  • I'm so sorry to hear the worst possible news. Please know that this is not your fault! There is not anything that you could have done to prevent this from happening. I remembered you mentioning that you were relatively early in your pg. In my experience, everything went like a heavy period. Cramps got worse when I passed tissue, but then tapered off. I felt afterward a little like I'd been punched in the stomach, but nothing that advil didn't help. I hope you were able to get through the work day & are taking care of yourself.

    Again, I am so sorry to hear that you had to come here. It's a place that none of us want to be, but the ladies here are nothing but supportive. {{HUGS}}

    BFP#1 1/27/09 :: Natural m/c 2/6/09 @ 6w
    BFP#2 5/11/09 :: Natural m/c 5/27/09 @ 5w5d
    BFP#3 7/24/09 :: Missed m/c, baby stopped growing at 6w4d :: natural m/c 8/28/09 @ 8w6d
    BFP #4 11/27/09 :: DD born 7/27/10
    BFP #5 2/29/12 :: DD born 11/6/12


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  • I'm so sorry for your loss- and that you have to come here.  At the least- you will find this board very supportive.  I'm sending you good thoughts....
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  • I'm so sorry.  I think it is next to impossible to not get excited when you find out you are pregnant.  I know for us it was something we so badly wanted.  I was devestated and still am that I am no longer pg.  I went through a whole range of emotions and so wish things were different (for everyone on this board) but please don't blame yourself.  It's so, so hard I know.  It's been a month for me and it is still very hard to get through some days. 
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  • I'm very sorry for your loss.
  • I'm so sorry. This is certainly a club that no one wants to join--please know that we were sending good thoughts your way and hoping for the best and will continue to do so.  ((HUGS))
  • I'm so sorry for your loss.  It's hard no matter how far you are!

    DS - 9/12/08 9 lbs 22.5 in.

    Natural M/C 9/21/09 at 8w 1d baby measured 6w 3d

    DS2 - 7/13/10 10 lb 2.5 oz. 21.5 in

    DD1 - 9/21/12 9 lbs 4 oz. 22.5 in 

    Baby #4 due Spring of 2014!

  • I'm so sorry about your loss.  I am sorry that people made you feel like you couldn't post here before, I know how scary it is to not know what's going on. 

    Don't feel like a failure, you didn't do anything wrong that would make this happen to you, sometimes these things just happen. 

    I'm sure everything will go well and you will get pregnant again with a sticky baby soon. 

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