I'm heartbroken (NAR)

TTCgradstud

I got a email last night that my friend's 1 month old baby died.  From what I've gathered, they don't know why yet.  I'm crushed for them and can't even do anything for them since we are so far away.  (although I am open to suggestions if anyone has them!)  I'm considering offering them the use of our house, which is staged for sale but not lived in, if they want to get away for a few days to have some privacy and a change of scenery- would that be odd?

 

Temp206787500007404

Oh man, that is so awful.  I'm so sorry. 

Honeydew1894

I am so sorry. That is just awful.

lisanjay

Prayers for your friends.

Offering your house would be a very nice gesture, even if they don't take you up on it. I believe just acknowledging their loss means a lot to those that are grieving. So many times people remain silent because they are afraid of saying the wrong thing, and that silence is what hurts them more than what the wrong words might be.

PSU-NCBride

I agree. Just the offer would be nice. My husband's best friend and his wife lost a child last year after a few days. Not the same as a month, but still devastating. We have a local nonprofit that works with grieving families who lose a child. Maybe research and see if they have anything similar in their area.

Capricornbaby80

Aw man that is so awful. My heart goes out to them. Sometimes a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on works wonders. Don't get me wrong it won't make the pain go away but having someone to express the hurt to helps.

pinkwedding05

That makes me feel sick for them.  I'll be thinking of them. 

crystalpopcorn

I am so sorry.  As a mother, I cannot think of anything worse than losing a child.  My friend lost her baby earlier this year.  She talks a lot about how you can help someone going through this type of grief.  She keeps a blog and has posted tips (from another blog) on how to help a friend dealing with grief.  I will PM the list to you.

In terms of tangible things, I think that offering your home is great.  You may also want to look into getting a cleaning service for your friend and / or sending meals or restaurant gift cards.  

 

 

CaptainSerious

Oh, this is just a horrible situation.  I'm so sorry!

I agree that offering your house would be nice, just don't be surprised if they don't take you up on it.  Also, I was thinking along the same lines as pp--is there some way you could offer them gift certificates for local take-out places or send them some prepared meals that they could just reheat and eat?  People who are dealing with a loss rarely think to eat, yet alone shop or cook for themselves.

Finally, just letting your friends know that you are there for them is probably the best thing you can do.  A lot of people swoop in at times like these, but soon move on in their lives.  It's the people that make themselves available and listen to you in the weeks and months following that really help you work through your grief.

RFBsbride

Oh that's terrible.... I'm so, so sorry.  My thoughts and prayers are with your friend and her family during this horrible tragedy.  (((HUGS)))

FinallyMrs.G

I'm so sorry! My thoughts and prayers are with her and her family. That's very nice of you to offer your house to them.

lovemymonkey

oh no! that's heartbreaking! :-(  oh, I'm so so sorry for their loss.

I think the best thing you can do is to offer up your support. Send them a card or a donation, if they are accepting any. Then in a month, send them another card to tell them that you are thinking of them. When there's a loss, there's always so much support and activity in the beginning. It's easy to get distracted by everything that's going on, but weeks/months down the road when all is quiet again, that's when it really hits. I think reminding them that you're thinking of them then would be great. Don't forget to email them, call them, send them cards to let them know you're thinking about them and their little one.

(((((hugs)))))

ColoRxGirl

OMGosh, that's so sad.  My prayers go out to them.

I think it would be very kind of you to offer your home.