MIL has a negative association with...

blessedandhopeful

...the name Lila. This happens to be my #1 FAVORITE name right now. Granted, at this point it is still just a name I like for my phantom baby, but if your MIL or a family member had a negative association with a name you love, would you keep it in mind, or throw it out? Apparently, a lady named Lila almost caused her and her (now) ex-husband (my FIL) to break up sooner than they did. That's as much as I know. Oh, and she mentioned if I named our kid Lila, she'd probably have to call her by whatever her middle name was.

wheelenl

Don't take this the wrong way, but don't worry about it. You might never have a girl. You could end up with 5 boys. Who knows? There are enough things in life to worry about.

I know it's fun to talk about what you might name your baby but take it from someone having her second boy  who thinks she's probably done, I'd just not get worked up about it. 

There's a family name for a girl I love that my SIL (who's not married)  "claimed." I was seriously considering using it, but I never told her that, and it's just as well. It would have been a fight over nothing, because I won't ever be using it.

MissFreo

This is why we won't be discussing name choices with anyone until the name is on the birth certificate and it's too late.  Your mother, father, MIL, FIL, SIL, etc could have a negative association with any name, because of something anyone did to them at some point in their lives.  It's just too much to worry about - I say pick whatever name makes you and DH happy, and keep it quiet.

EmmaRain

If you are worried about it enough to consider changing the name, how about Leila/Layla or Isla/Eilah?

They have a similar sound, are just as pretty in my opinion, and might not offend MIL.

Temp965378937506476

No it wouldn't bother me. When your MIL holds that baby girl (if you have one and name her Lila) I can pretty much guarantee she's still going to love that baby.

mlgd

Generally, I wouldn't care if a family member just "didn't like" a name for no particular reason. Or if they they had a negative association that was somewhat petty (an ex-friend from middle schoolor whatever).  In this case, however, if this is something that brings up a painful subject/memory, I would take that into consideration.  

ash.flea

**Edited because I just realized how b!tchy that sounded.

 I wouldn't worry about it yet.  Maybe when the time comes she'll warm up to it, or you'll have a new name.  In the end, I think she will grow to love whatever name you chose.  And remember that it is your choice in the end, not hers.

ubermoose

mlgd:

Generally, I wouldn't care if a family member just "didn't like" a name for no particular reason. Or if they they had a negative association that was somewhat petty (an ex-friend from middle schoolor whatever).  In this case, however, if this is something that brings up a painful subject/memory, I would take that into consideration.  

This. I wouldn't give my kid the same name as "the other woman", regardless what shape I deemed the marriage to be in anyway. That name understandably leaves a sour taste in her mouth. Even if your little Lila is prescious and she loves it to pieces, I don't think the other association will simply melt away.

naflmj

My MIL hates my number 1 girl name, Evelyn because it was the name of her husbands wretched aunt...I love it and the nn Evie and I have told her that she can't tell me what to name my children.

She also hates the mn for our girl Rae which is for my grandfather, sorry not going to change that.

Oh yea, and she said Graeme sounds like a kid who needs glasses...we're still sticking with it.

Don't you love MIL's?

wheelenl

naflmj:

My MIL hates my number 1 girl name, Evelyn because it was the name of her husbands wretched aunt...I love it and the nn Evie and I have told her that she can't tell me what to name my children.

She also hates the mn for our girl Rae which is for my grandfather, sorry not going to change that.

Oh yea, and she said Graeme sounds like a kid who needs glasses...we're still sticking with it.

Don't you love MIL's?

LOL--one of my favorite girl names was the name of my grandfather-in-law (MIL's dad)'s mother, who drove my grandmother-in-law crazy.  I was still probably going to use it, if given the chance.

When I told my MIL we were probably using Graham/Graeme, she said "What about Grant?" And I just giggled, and said, "Well, it's a nice name, but we don't like it as much as Graham." But my MIL is actually a great person.

mlf625

I nixed a name I love because my mom had a coworker by that name who made her life hell. ?So yes, it would matter to me. ?Unless you hate your MIL. ?Then use it. ?;)

Moesten

I wouldn't allow it to alter my choice unless I really thought the name would bring pain to someone or if it were DH that felt a strong negative association. I have negative associations with some names I really like (who doesn't?) but as time goes by those negative associations diminish or are replaced with better associations as I meet others with the name.

 

As an aside, I would not allow someone to call my child by another name. I would correct them each and every time. 

newportbride715

She should really get a grip and keep her opinions to herself. It is not about her, it is about you, your DH and your future LO. From now on, do not discuss names with her and go w/ whichever ones you both like!

hopefulmom

By the time you have a girl (if you do have a girl) you might love a different name.  I wouldn't worry about your MIL not liking the name - regardless.  My best friend's DH divorced her after 22 years of marriage and married another woman the day after the divorce was final (their neighbor!).  Anyway, when her only son had his first baby (boy) he named him the same name as her ex.  She was in total shock!  She told me that she would NEVER call him by his name.  It has been 3 years and she calls him by his name.  It did take her about a year though...she would just ask how the "baby" was.  They live 5 hours apart so she doesn't see them much...I think it would have happened sooner if they lived close.  Your MIL will eventually come around if you do name a DD Lila so don't decide on another name "because" of her negativism.

PunkyBooster

Why would your MIL even reveal that information to you?

I wouldn't worry about it. 

abba916

my MIL and some other family members have had some strong opinions about our potential names but I'm in the "I'm pushing it out- so it's my decision" camp...

I told my MIL that if she doesnt like x.y.or z name- she should be thankful she doesnt have any children named that... 

jstone03

This is why you never tell anyone your name choices until the baby is born.  It's hard enough choosing a name without having to worry about someone else's past relationship drama.  Puh-lease.