My doc is mad at me....

Julyweds

I feel stupid.  I called my OB's line last night only because I had pain from 4pm that hadn't gone away since 11.  Honestly, I called and told them that I thought it could be RLP which is fine but I just wasn't sure.  The doc on call wasn't either.  It's still here today-whatever.  Meanwhile this follows last week when I had severe pelvic pressure and my peri didn't return my call until after hours and told me to go in to be seen.  Again, I guess I have a completely foolish innability to gauge what is normal. Additionally, after 3 ivfs and risk for cervical incompetence it's hard to go "oh I feel like I have bad pelvic pressure all day but let me ignore it b/c I'm sure it's normal" when I simply don't know.  So my OB basically slapped me on the wrist to say that I cant call at night for pain when it's simply part of life when you are having twins.  Awesome.

dusk42

That's lame.  Being higher-risk is also part of life when you are having twins (at least I'm assuming, since you have a peri and are at risk for cervical incompetence).  If they have issues with calling at night, they can institute a charge to weed out other people, but how are you supposed to know what pain is normal?  

Julyweds

Exactly our point- he made me feel like a fool but how am I supposed to know???  All of the stupid books say you should contact your doc if any pelvic pain desn't subside within 4 hours.  The peri told me signs of my cervix changing include pelvic pressure.  Well gee- how am I supposed to know?

DavezWife

tell your OB to suck it.

IT IS THEIR JOB to make sure that any pain, spotting, pulling, yanking... is not anything serious.

Those things CAN mean something. It's not YOUR job to determine that.

madhatter2003

You weren't being dumb, you were being pro-active about your care. If they don't want calls in teh middle of the night they should not have become OBs!!

dusk42

Do you like the OB otherwise?  If not, I'd think about switching to someplace that is more comfortable.  

chocolatechip06

You are not being dumb...you are pro-active like pp said.  I had no signs inititally with my IC and we all know how that ended.  From week 22-23 I kept telling the doctors and my DH that something had changed (my CL post cerclage had dropped slightly as well).  They told me to stay at home b/c there was nothing they could do at that point.

 

At 23.5 weeks I was 3-4 cm dilated (through my cerclage) and I delivered 5 days later.

 So if you are feeling something that you are not sure about, I would most definitely call in...you know your body best.  You have to be your own advocate sometimes.  If your OB is not listening can you switch to your peri for the rest of the pregnancy as your main doc (I only had an MFM not an additional OB as well).

fallbride110406

Uh, I had pain for an hour and a half and my on call OB told me if it lasted another 30 minutes to go straight to the ER.  I had a follow up two days later and the OB told me to never second guess calling them if I feel something that I don't think is right.

I would be pissed. 

LucyPevensie

I find this shockingly irresponsible on your doctor's part.  I wonder if he/she would be willing to put that in writing: do not call if having pain, it's part of life when you're having twins. 

I doubt it.  I'd be real tempted to let your OB know that - fine - you won't call if you're having pain if he/she IS willing to put that in writing and to take full medical and financial responsibility if something goes wrong because you have pain and don't call to let him/her know.

What an assshole.  

boshi799

You are having twins. You should be calling or going in for ANYTHING that you feel could be a problem. I firmly beleive this, and my doctors/nurses got annoyed at me too but I made it to 38.5 weeks with two healthy babies so I really could not care less if they hate me or think I am annoying. It was for the health of my children, I would call or go in for anything.

 So please do not let him change how often you call. You can also just go right into the hospital to labor and delivery where they will check you. Just remember, you will only be pregnan for a short time and do you really care if your doctor likes you?

MsGirl1

There is no way in hell I would sit back and take that. Report it to your clinic's office manager. That doctor is there to serve you! They should not in any way make you feel bad about being concerned about your pregnancy. You just never know, especially with twins. I would be getting an apology and a change of attitude from that doctor or I would be switching.

I'm sorry you have had to deal with that. Please don't feel bad about doing the right thing for your babies!

Julyweds

True- You are all completely right and confirming everything that my husband and I have been saying to each other ever since the call.  My husband is going to the next appt with this doc and asking him to clarify on which pains I should ignore.  The entire phone call literally ruined my ability to accomplish anything this morning.  It really ticked me off.  Last I checked we're the reasons they get paid...am I wrong?  I could understand it if I was calling every night and going to the hospital every other...obviously, that's not the case.

MrsJeffsWife2B

LucyPevensie:

I find this shockingly irresponsible on your doctor's part.  I wonder if he/she would be willing to put that in writing: do not call if having pain, it's part of life when you're having twins. 

I doubt it.  I'd be real tempted to let your OB know that - fine - you won't call if you're having pain if he/she IS willing to put that in writing and to take full medical and financial responsibility if something goes wrong because you have pain and don't call to let him/her know.

What an assshole.  

 EXACTLY!!!

I would switch practices, this is just negligent IMO.

Radler

I'll echo the previous posters, and say I'd switch OBs, too. Every time I've called, even when it's turned out to be nothing, they've said not to feel bad, that you need to trust yourself and call when you think it's necessary.

THAT is the proper attitude from a doctor. ESPECIALLY with twins.