Day 2 of preschool - considering home schooling

Littlejen22

OMG, DS went with the teacher fine on Friday, the first day.  He was cautious but went and when I picked him up they said he had a rough day but that he will be fine but he was all happy to see me and waving...they do drop-offs and pick-ups in front.  Well, day 2...not so easy.  When we pulled up to the line he told me "I won't go."  Well, before the teacher even came to get him it was hysterics and when we went to take him he held onto the two seats in the van with his legs spread out with a death-grip.  I parked and went in to see how he was and how the teacher was with him and he was sitting on one of the teachers laps, he was turned to the side so I could not tell if he was crying or not but she was reading to him for a little while.  Then she asked a few questions, he shook his head no, shrugged his shoulders and then started sobbing  Worst part, there were  kids in class and all the rest (all girls and he is the youngest) were playing out "Head and Shoulders, Knees and Toes."  I feel so bad for him.  This is why he is going, because he needs time without me and DH because he does not even have a baby sitter but it was so sad.

I told DH I have found a use for my Elementary Education degree...home schooling!

Zenya

aw!  He's pretty young.  I'd give it a couple of day and then just wait a year.    DS was definitely not read at that age  He turned 3 in June and I'm pretty optimistic that he's ready now (he starts tomorrow).

*Amy*

Sorry he had a rough day.  I honestly would give it more time before you decide to pull him. It took Anthony a week to get adjusted (he is the youngest in his class as well).  Now he kisses be and runs into his classroom he can't wait to go.

DandelionMom

(((hugs))) to both of you!  He is young so if it doesn't work out this year I bet he'll be fine next year. 

Jen2004

Give it a little more time. It's hard... I have had KDGers have a rough first week or two and then all of a sudden they come skipping in one day and are so happy to be at school. Maybe you can see if you can get some play dates with a few parents after school or whatnot I had a parent do that once and it really helped her son. GL and remind him school is fun.

LestaMarie

Poor little guy.   Ava did this for almost two months last year at Mother's Day Out...all the other kids were so happy and singing along, and she would just sit in the corner and cry.  It broke my heart.  But she eventually got used to it, and at the end of the year when they gave us their end-of-year "yearbooks" I saw pictures of her playing in those early days with the other kids, which told me she only had a rough time when I first dropped her off.  And now she is fine. 

I think you're doing the right thing - better to get him used to being away for a little while now, than to blast him in kindergarten with five full days a week.  That happened to me (I never went to preschool) and it was a pretty rough transition for a while.

docmay25

This is totally normal for day 2.  I am a toddler teacher and always have one or two kids that cry all day the first few days.  It happens and the teachers are prepared for it.  This was me on Thursday with one of my new students.  The only time he wasn't crying was at nap time.  It will get better.  He needs to get used to it.

I had one girl who cried the entire first week.  By the second month she ended up being the most outgoing one in the class!  Keep talking to the teachers, give them suggestions of things he likes that may distract him (whether he loves blocks or certain songs) this will make him feel more comfortable.  And talk positively about his day.  Talk about everything they did at school (even if he didn't participate).

Don't worry, it will get better.

Ciarrai

Give him some time to adjust.  Like you said, he's not used to being away from you.  DD#2 had a rough day her first week too.  The second day was much worse than the first.  The second week was better.  She still screams when I drop her off, but I can peek in the window 5 minutes later and she's playing away.  They said she's still shy but she loves music and art the best. It gets better.  I promise!  DD#1 did this, but less.  (She's my social butterfly.)  Now she's in her third year of MDO (second year at the same school) and she happily runs off to her teacher and friends without even looking back or saying good bye. 

Temp108743750006959

it gets better! when I taught the 3's class, we had the 'drop off' too. DS's preschool teacher doesn't agree with that tactic and I have to agree -- DS goes right to the toys for free time and doesn't even notice me leaving. I like that we can connect with the teacher for 1 minute, and then leave.

*Amy*

The other suggestion that the preschool had to help is always be positive and when you are dropping off, picking up or he is crying about it-tell him how much fun he is going to have and how exciting it is to be at school.  You don't want him to see you being affected by his sadness.  He needs to know you are excited and hopefully it will help get him excited.

DandelionMom

I forgot to mention -- My DD has been wearing one of my bracelets to kindergarten so she won't miss me (that's how she put it but I suspect she just likes my bracelet!), maybe your DS would like to borrow something from you? 

Littlejen22

I am still trying to be optimistic because I love the school and if he goes to this school next year it would be 5 days a week, 2.5 hours and this year is 3 days a week so it is a good intro...it's Montessori that is private but only until Kindergarten.

*Amy*

Anthony is in a 5 day a week 2.5 hour a day program and he will be 3 in October.  He is doing great.  Your little guy will get there. I know how hard it is.

littlemermaid

Definitely give it more time, sometimes it takes a week or two, especially since they aren't going every day.  It's something new and anxiety is to be expected from something new that doesn't include you. 

emiliemadison

It can be hard the first week or so, especially if this is their first experience without parents. Have you read the book "The Kissing Hand"? It's perfect to help kids in this type of situation. And I love the PPs bracelet idea, so sweet! We did something similar; I drew a heart on the back of DDs hand and kissed it and then drew a heart on my hand and she kissed it. Then I said that if she missed me she could just kiss the heart on her hand and it would be like kissing Mommy. She loved it

suzymarie

Can you do a class that separates a little more gently?

 Here in MN they have parent child ed classes where you do the first ~hour together, and then the kids go to another room and the parents do a parent-ed thing. 

If a kid freaks out they come get the parent and the parent spends the rest of teh time with the kid, as the kid slowly gets used to the new room, teachers, and separating.

There is a reason kindy starts at 5- most kids are ready to separate by 5 (developmentally) so it isn't totally shocking that a 3 year old isn't quite ready yet.