Woman in hysterics...couldn't find her child

UBMyBaby

It was awful to see.

On Saturday, the we went to a local art fair in a downtown area.  We're looking at crafts when this woman a few booths down starts screaming.  She was throwing herself around screaming a name.  She was beside herself. 

Another woman emerges from that area and says, "Start looking!  A little girl in an orange dress.  Orange dress!"  So I immediately am scanning the crowds for this missing girl.  There was a busy road ahead of me, so I looked right and saw people on the street in benches and by store fronts.  I start yelling, "Has anyone seen a little girl in an orange dress come by here?  A woman lost her daughter!"  And everyone just STARES at me.  I repeat myself.  Nobody says a word.  I was floored.  I turn back around and head back to the street, and then someone yells out that the little girl was found.  She had walked several booths away and disappeared into the crowd.  She looked about 6 years old.  The whole thing probably took 3-4 minutes but it was tense.

I was upset for the poor woman.  I got the chills.  She was holding her daughter and the grandmother was in tears.  It was awful to hear a mother screaming for her child in a crowded place.

But I can't stop thinking about the majority of people who either A) walked right past her or ignored it and just stared.  You would think that would mobilize people to get up, call her name, look around, etc.   Nobody even answered me when I asked.  There were probably a dozen people just staring back at me--mostly women. 

I told my dad who said that he would guess people didn't get involved because they assess the situation--is it real?  Is it risky?  Should I get involved? He's probably right, but that seems so strange when it is actually happening.  I'm just glad the woman found the little girl.

 

kylara111

I read something not long ago about mob mentality (can't remember where).  Apparently, that is a very typical response in a situation like that.  Its not that people don't care.  I guess they react the way others around them are reacting (the other people staring) and think that someone else (you) will handle it. 

ETA:  That's really horrible.  One of my biggest fears.  My brother disappered in a mall once for hours.  My parents thought for sure that he was gone.  He'd just wandered off - there one minute, gone the next but we eventually found him.

#6

This has happened to me.  I worked at walmart for almost 5yrs.  During that 5 years I would say I helped look for about 10-12 children who had wondered offf.  I would start walking around asking the other customers if they had seen a missing child discribed what he/she was wearing etc.  Some would help others would just stand and stare.  

Brewster

No joke, that happened to me in the mall with Noah. ?He climbed under a table and wouldn't/didn't come out when I was screaming his name. ?The whole mall was swirling around me in a blur. ?It was the scariest 2 minutes of my life. ?Once I finally found him I just sat on the floor of the food court, hugging him and bawling. ?I would not wish that on anyone. ?

Rebekah1021

That makes my heart race just reading this.

AnnapolisLari

I lost Matthew at the zoo for 2 minutes when we went to meet CleoKitty and esposa. He had just pushed his way up to see the cheetahs, but that was a fun couple of minutes... there were TONS of school groups there that day.

Hence the reason that he wears his monkey backpack in public. I'd rather be judged for putting my kid on a leash than lose him, thanks.

UBMyBaby

I feel bad for any mom whose child is lost, even for a few moments.  It is heart-wrenching. 

Mrs Manners

kylara111:

I read something not long ago about mob mentality (can't remember where).  Apparently, that is a very typical response in a situation like that.  Its not that people don't care.  I guess they react the way others around them are reacting (the other people staring) and think that someone else (you) will handle it. 

I read something about this too. They say that's why you have to give specific orders in a crisis. For example, if your child needs emergency help, do not just say "Call 911". Say, "You in the blue shirt, call 911 now". That way you've give someone a specific task and they will see that it gets done (even if they don't have a cell phone they will find someone who does because that's their "task").

DandR

Last week at preschool drop off the older man, I'm guessing grandfather, parked by me and when he opened the mini-van door he started saying really loud "Where is Johnny? Johnny are you in here??" and I was about to go ask if he needed help because he had one kid in his arms and at that point I was afraid he had left the other one at home accidentally.....all of a sudden Johnny (not real name) jumps out of the back seat.  I'm not sure if it was a game they play or something Johnny did that morning for "fun"...but it scared me to death!  The man sounded panicked when he was talking like it wasn't a game....

UBMyBaby

Mrs Manners:

kylara111:

I read something not long ago about mob mentality (can't remember where).  Apparently, that is a very typical response in a situation like that.  Its not that people don't care.  I guess they react the way others around them are reacting (the other people staring) and think that someone else (you) will handle it. 

I read something about this too. They say that's why you have to give specific orders in a crisis. For example, if your child needs emergency help, do not just say "Call 911". Say, "You in the blue shirt, call 911 now". That way you've give someone a specific task and they will see that it gets done (even if they don't have a cell phone they will find someone who does because that's their "task").

 

This is SUCH good advice.  I never thought of that, but hope to remember that if I'm ever in that situation.  I bet there is a big difference when giving a specific person a task instead of just calling it out.  Thanks for posting this!

DesignerMama

UBMyBaby:

Mrs Manners:

kylara111:

I read something not long ago about mob mentality (can't remember where).? Apparently, that is a very typical response in a situation like that.? Its not that people don't care.? I guess they?react the way others around them are reacting (the other people staring) and think that someone else (you) will handle it.?

I read something about this too. They say that's why you have to give specific orders in a crisis. For example, if your child needs emergency help, do not just say "Call 911". Say, "You in the blue shirt, call 911 now". That way you've give someone a specific task and they will see that it gets done (even if they don't have a cell phone they will find someone who does because that's their "task").

?

This is SUCH good advice.? I never thought of that, but hope to remember that if I'm ever in that situation.? I bet there is a big difference when giving a specific person a task instead of just calling it out.? Thanks for posting this!

I remember this from CPR training. Must have said it about 80 times:?"Annie, Annie, are you ok? Not breathing. You and you, call 911."

They recommended tell two people to do it (in my class, we had to point to two specific people in the crowd) to absolutely make sure it gets done. If you just yell "someone call 911" everyone will just assume that someone else will do it. ?

How scary for the mom in that situation!?

*Amy*

I just got chills reading that. It is so scary.