HELP. Am I a bad mom if I

mamarazzi

stop nursing because DS is biting? He's 8 months and he's been CHOMPING on my nipples. It's awful and I don't know how to stop it.

He has multiple food allergies, too, so this may just be the "last straw" or a good excuse to stop, but I feel bad. His pedi and allergist agree that breastmilk would be best for him with all his allergies/digestive issues, but after adhering to a strict diet for nearly 8 months and now having my nips practically chewed off, I'm just over it.

Just last week we finally got him to start taking formula in any form (I barely get enough when I pump so I'm constantly stressed about it and have had to leave work early to go feed him and could never be away from him for more than a couple hours). I've still been having to mix it half formula to half breastmilk, but at least it's something.

Would you stop? Or is there some way I can keep him from biting?

TIA.

CubbyMama

Ugh...I'm sorry you're having such a rough time lately!  I haven't had a big problem with biting, with either of the girls (yet) but since DD2 just sprouted 2 teeth, we've already had a few "scrapes" that are definitely not pleasant!  I have heard that for repeated biters, if you just immediately take them off the breast, say, "no" (firmly but not yelling or anything) and stop nursing for maybe 5 minutes, and then try again, they eventually learn the cause-and-effect relationship between biting you and getting the precious boobie taken away.  GL!

EMT

Honestly, I can't tell you what to do on that one.  But DS bit me yesterday with his brand new teeth and it effing kills.  He hasn't done it since and it was right when he latched so I'm sure it was an accident but still HOLY HELL!

I've always had a pretty easy time BFing.  No major issues really; I'm not sure how long I'd have lasted if I'd had some of the issues that one can experience from BFing.

mlm1128

I hardly think that would make you a bad mom after all you've done so far.  Doesn't he have to start trying food soon to see what he can tolerate?  Will he eat if it isn;t breast milk?

CubbyMama

Oh, and to answer your question, NO, it doesn't make you a bad mom if you stop!  We're doing the half-and-half thing with formula when I'm at work, too, b/c she won't take straight formula, but we're making progress toward it. 

Desert*Flower

No, you would not be a bad mom. It sounds like you are having a very rough time. When ds would bite, I would pull him in toward me (so it blocked his nose) he would immediately release his latch/bite, I would firmly but calmly say "no" then we would relatch and continue. This worked for us. DS had a sensitive stomach (dairy, spicy, a lot of vegetables, etc irritated him) not nearly what you have described that your ds has, but I think one of the reasons I stuck out nursing past a year was because I was so nervous about his stomach issues. I had to go on antibiotics and had to stop nursing around 13 months and I felt really guilty - but he was fine! Good luck with your decision!

mollynpatrick

You definitely won't be a bad mom if you stop! You've made it through a lot more than many women would. I'm struggling with a similar issue (stopping BFing). I'm having major guilt because I BF DS forever and I am heading back to work full-time and I just will not have time to pump (I teach) without causing myself major stress. Ahh! Anyhoo - ditto cubby's suggestion. When DS bit I did the same thing and it totally worked. Good luck with your decision!!

Temp374386125003286

You should stop when you are ready.  Kyle had the same allergies and I worked so hard to overcome everything (as you have).  When I finally said that it was enough and stopped (7 months) I felt good about it.  I was sad at first but felt that it was the right decision.  Good for you for doing as much as you have with these circumstances. 

femmegem

Uh, NO. You have done far, far more to continue BFing than I ever would have done, and I give you major props for that. I don't think anyone would blame you for stopping at this point.

BrainySmurfette

CubbyMama:

Ugh...I'm sorry you're having such a rough time lately!  I haven't had a big problem with biting, with either of the girls (yet) but since DD2 just sprouted 2 teeth, we've already had a few "scrapes" that are definitely not pleasant!  I have heard that for repeated biters, if you just immediately take them off the breast, say, "no" (firmly but not yelling or anything) and stop nursing for maybe 5 minutes, and then try again, they eventually learn the cause-and-effect relationship between biting you and getting the precious boobie taken away.  GL!

This worked for me.  I only had to do a few times.

JOEBunny

I probably would, if there was a formula that he could take well.  I can't take super restrictive diets.

GrowingFamily

I BF DD#1 until she was 18 mos & stopped then because I was pg with DD#2.  I BF DD#2 until she was 10 mos, at which point she self-weaned.  Then along came DS#2....I stopped BFing him at 3.5 mos because he already had 2 teeth coming through & he would not stop biting me! It REALLY hurt!  None of the "tactics" to get him to stop biting, that I had used on my DD's, worked on him because he was too young to understand what was going on (my 3 older kids didn't get teeth until 7.5 mos). 

I think you need to do what's best for you.  If you feel it's time to stop, then it's time to stop.  You have done a great job BFing this long.  If you want to keep going, the book "So That's What They're For" addresses biting in one of the chapters.  GL!!

am073104

I think you're a great mom for keeping it up this long!!!  It has to be so hard to be on the diet you're on right now and have him biting you.  My pedi said to nurse after 6 months as long as it is going well for *both* of you, and right now it isn't. 

[I nursed J for 18mos until I was pg w/C, but I don't know how long I'll nurse C.  I sort of (selfishly) want my body back, but I'm too nervous to exercise at my (old) usual intensity because I think my supply will tank.  I hope C and I make it until 12 mos.]

With J, I just did the un-latch and firm no, and after a few times, she didn't bite anymore.  C has 3 teeth and luckily he hasn't bit me *yet*.