Also - anyone here doing/done special needs / disability adoption?

mysticriver

Has anyone adopted  - or is anyone in the process of adopting - a child with physical / developmental / emotional challenges?  (I know that "special needs" is often used to describe non-infant adoption, as in adoption from the state, so I wanted to distinguish)

Does one need a particular background such as nursing, social work, etc to be considered?  Are there any other considerations or any things we could do to prepare?

We may be six months or a year away from starting our adoption journey, I'd like to get our ducks in a row. 

 Please share stories.  TIA!

Sally J

My DD was exposed to meth in utero and experienced withdrawal symptoms for several weeks.  She also exhibited the typical colicky behavior of a drug exposed infant.  She has had a slight delay in major motor skills and language skills, as well has being incredibly impatient and quick to anger.  We may face learning disabilities down the road.  These are all typical of meth exposure in utero.

Neither my husband or I have any special backround, nor were we required to have any.  CA cut their 'training classes' for adopting through the system due to budget cuts so we never got to take any classes through the state.  I think it would be important to do a lot of research on what you can/can't handle and get the truth of what you may have to deal with for a special needs child (infant or older child).  I did some research, but I didn't do enough about how to parent for some of the difficult behaviors. Nestie  Come*on*baby gave me tons of great advice and books to read, so I'm starting there...so far I am at least seeing an improvement in my patience since I feel like I have some tools I can use.

akimbo

Just a lurker on this board, but as a Mom to a SN kiddo - I just wanted to give you a shout out of support.  He has some challenges (but doesn't everyone?) and is simply the happiest, most loving, wins you over in 5 seconds flat, amazing child. Enough so that I am considering adopting a child in the future with his same Dx. I'm pretty private about him but would absolutely respond to a PM to offer you more info and candidly answer any questions you may have.

come*on*baby

we have submitted our home study for a little boy with developmental and emotional delays, possible autism. for this particular child they were looking for someone that had a lot of training in attachment issues, knowledge of drug exposure and willing to have him as an only child for at least a year. i don't think just anyone could deal with how this little boy is at night and how he sometimes falls asleep. the first weekend we did respite for him, i found myself in tears with him while i was rocking him, wondering how anyone could do this to a child (neglect, drug use during pregnancy, etc.)

mysticriver

Thank you everyone for sharing your stories (sorry, I've been trying to reply all day but having posting problems)

To clarify, in my state some of the literature seems to classify any hard-to-place child(ren) as special needs (for example an older sibling group) so I wasn't sure how universal the terminology was.  But I was thinking of any physical or developmental delays, including alcohol/drug exposure.  I know less about certain behavioral issues (had to look up RAD) and it looks like I would need to do some more research.

Our bio child was born early and has had some delays and medical issues, so we're kind of "in the system" already - used to lots of medical stuff, used to EI, used to specialists.  That's kind of what got me thinking about special needs adoption - after our experience I think we'd be good advocates, and we live in an area with a lot of medical and educational resources available.  Plus we've found that the challenges and "being different" don't really bother us, we just kind of live our lives.

But I know less about some conditions than others - it looks like there is a lot of reading to do and maybe volunteering with kids with different needs.  But it sounds I wouldn't necessarily need to be a medical/social services professional to be considered?

Thank you again everyone for sharing your family's stories