How do you find me time?

Read2Me

I am starting to feel a little isolated! ?DH plays volleyball two nights a week (Mon and Tues) and many weekend days during the summer, plus he has a meeting every Thursday evening. ?He feels he needs this time to unwind after working all day and I agree- he has definitely earned it but when do I get my time? ?I feel like I am with DD every waking hour of every day, and while I love her to pieces, sometimes I just need a break. ?I've mentioned it to DH and he does let me sleep in on Saturdays (when he doesn't have volleyball) but once I get up he tends to disappear and it's just me and Eva. ?I don't even know what I would do if I had some time to myself! ?I feel like I need to take up a hobby of some sort that will get me out of the house but that doesn't cost much/any money. ?Any ideas? ?Anyone else in the same boat? ?Thanks for any input you may have!

WifeyLindsay

I find that it works best when I schedule a time for my DH to watch my DD ahead of time, regardless of what I want to do. You just have to ask him ahead of time so he has enough time to plan for it.

I go out sometimes after DD has gone to bed so DH doesn't really have to do anything because shes already asleep... sometimes he watches her just so I can run errands in peace, sometimes he watches her while I get my hair done, etc., but just like your DH has things planned, you should plan things for yourself. You deserve it and it will be good for you, your DH and your DD!

cp760

The only 'me' time I really get is that I started going to a bible study at my church for moms who have kids elementary age or younger. I go every Wednesday night (I just got home). We have lots of fun and we always discuss 'mom' topics or topics that help us relate to our husbands etc.. It's nice to have other moms who understand and at the end of each of our meetings I always feel so refreshed and it feels good to know that all of us moms feel so stretched to our limits and that we're not alone. We play games and laugh and have serious discussions and we help each other through hard times. It's just an awesome group. It's often scary to start going to a new group or organization that you've never been to, to be the 'new person' and it held me back for a long time, but I finally make the plunge a few months ago and I'm so glad I did.

Other than that, the only other 'me' time I get is once a month my playgroup has a moms-night-out. We usually just go out to dinner, but it's nice to unwind.

Rachel Bennett

Between two kids here in the near future I am going to be really busy and probably will not have much time to myself, but I am grateful I am going back to school so that will probably be my only time around adults... I told my husband I don't think many people appreciate going to school but I am totally waiting for it to come in January. I know I will be busy with that.?

mandymack

I have definitely been there and felt that way, for sure, especially in that 1st year as DH & I were trying to find our footing as parents, trying to get back as a couple and trying to make time for our individual hobbies and it wasn't easy trying to balance it all.

I think really asserting MY needs, insisting that I, too needed "down time" helped DH realize that he needed to help push me towards some time alone as much as I needed to schedule it for myself.  Girl's Night Out once per month and Girl's Night In once per month really helped me in the beginning.  Then, I started taking 3+ hours every single weekend, whether Friday night or Sunday afternoon, to just be alone: window shop, sleep in, have coffee at a cafe, catch a movie, get a pedicure, go workout, etc. and in return, I gave DH the same 3+ hours.  Once we started making alone time a priority for ourselves, it was easy to help make it for each other.

Taking a walk, browsing the shops just to be around all the beautiful things, reading a magazine while getting a pedicure, reading a book on the beach, and meeting a friend/family member for some afternoon gossip over ice cream are my favorites. 

Very best of luck and I hope you can get some alone time soon!

gjkhjr01

I'm going back to school this quarter. I have one evening class per week and one online class. Having something different to think about at home is great and driving by myself to class on monday nights is relaxing. I get to meet new people, work on my degree and DH has no problem with me being gone for just one evening. It's great!

taylormillgirl

We split our "me time" fairly evenly. He will meet up with friends for a beer, and I'll go to mom's night out with my MOMS group or to a movie. You could also join a book club; that's free.

Sit down with your H and have a calm discussion about scheduling time away from the children. And then actually schedule something! Have him add your "me time" to his calendar even if you don't have plans yet.

nikih47

You need to have a chat with him! That's so not fair.  I walk with a friend once a week, and once a month I go do something on the weekends.  Usually shopping or sitting in a coffee shop reading a book.  Try meetup.com