did you have a birth plan?

KKM

I didnt...my only wishes were that I didnt want a c-section, and Brady was going to be circ'ed.  Maybe it is because I am a nurse, but I get a little peeved by some who have super involved birth plans then get upset when things dont go exactly how they want. 

angie212

No, I didn't have one really.  I had ideas about what I wanted, but nothing concrete; I really trust my OB.  I ended up with a c/s (which I didn't want), but I feel like my wishes and feelings were treated very respectfully during the whole thing.

Worcbride

yes, it wasn't nit-picky and it wasn't used as I ended up w/a c-section.  I did include, however, that I didn't want her to have a paci and they respected that.

edit:  I could've cared less that things didn't go "as plan"  The only thing I really wanted was a healthy, happy baby and I got that!

VTbride05

We had a short list of things that we wanted with a big disclaimer that Henry's health was to come first, no matter what. We talked with our OB about letting the cord stop pulsing (which we couldnt do in the end), putting Henry right on me when he was born, and that he was to be circumsized. Everything went (pretty much) to the plan. I was glad to have thought everything out and talked about it with my ob, but putting it in writiing didnt seem necessary after the fact.

JLSBWG

Not really. I ended up having a c-section, so it didn't matter.

amajane

I didn't have a birth plan and I am a nurse too. I think they're rather ridiculous and I believe that most L&D nurses feel the same way. I think it's a good idea to clearly state your needs and wants but people who have very specific birth plans come across as very high?maintenance?(and I try to avoid patients like that).

Oh and God doesn't like it when you have a plan. She laughs and you and will mess with you.?

NewlywednOhio

Yep, I had one, and it was very simple.
I said no forceps, no vacuum, for DS to be circ?d, no interns, MIL and Mom and DH allowed in room only, lighting to be low in room. That?s about it!

johnsoar

no, I discussed it with my dr before hand and she said unless there was something really specific that I wanted or didn't want then they probably did it already anyway.

aforst

I did not have a birth plan.  I knew I wanted an epi and didn't want a c-section, but that was about it.  However, I trust my OB 110% and I did end up w/ an emergency c-section. She did everything she could to avoid it, but his life was in danger, so we did the c-section.  Like pp said, I wanted a healthy baby, and that's what I got.  I didn't feel pressured into anything, and my OB and nurses were very upfront with me about what was happening and what my options were!  Now...the LC on the other hand......but that's another post.

CleoKitty

No, but only because I had a homebirth and I already knew that my midwife and I were on the same page. There's no way I'd set foot into the hospital to give birth without a birth plan in hand.

It's not about being inflexible and wanting to piss off the nurses, but there are certain things that are just easier if you spell it out in advance: ie: delayed cord clamping when possible, declining eye ointment, no circ, no pacifiers, if a c-section is needed would prefer for the catheter to be inserted after the spinal, etc.

took79

No. 

KKM

NewlywednOhio:

Yep, I had one, and it was very simple.
I said no forceps, no vacuum, for DS to be circ?d, no interns, MIL and Mom and DH allowed in room only, lighting to be low in room. That?s about it!

so this is my thing...not to attack you NWO, but how can you say you dont want any forceps or vacuums?  They are used and needed for a reason...not just for fun.

nosoup4u

well, when the birthing climate in some hosptials is so controlling of women, it makes sense that women would like to have a say in some small part of the process, so I can definitely understand where those with birth plans are coming from. I think the problem is that many women don't know what their hospital's policies are before they choose their ideal birth...

I had specifics - no IV, no offers of pain meds, stuff like that. The hospital I was at was very supportive of med-free birth, though, so they weren't unreasonable requests.

mlc92404

I wanted an Epi, ASAP, that was about it....LOL

 

CMM05

Honestly, I think they are a joke. I mean, you should know going in if you want pain meds, but you have NO control over how your labor goes. I just find it interesting that a lot of girls spend so much time on this detailed, "perfect" labor plan. But.....as we all know....the baby comes on its own time and you have absolutely no control over how your labor will progress.

KKM

CleoKitty:

No, but only because I had a homebirth and I already knew that my midwife and I were on the same page. There's no way I'd set foot into the hospital to give birth without a birth plan in hand.

It's not about being inflexible and wanting to piss off the nurses, but there are certain things that are just easier if you spell it out in advance: ie: delayed cord clamping when possible, declining eye ointment, no circ, no pacifiers, if a c-section is needed would prefer for the catheter to be inserted after the spinal, etc.

This I totally get...this is what I would appreciate if I was a L&D nurse....it is all the other stuff (vaccums, forceps, only whisper, etc....) to me you would come off as very high maint.

thomas&lynn

Nothing written out. I had a talk with my midwife but it really was just a "I'd guess I'll see how it all goes" kinda talk. I told her I wanted to go as far as I could w/o meds but that I'm open to it. Ended up getting to the hospital at 10cm and ready to push so there went that. Wasn't sure if I wanted to hold a slimy baby after birth or not and my midwife put her right on me and I'm so happy she decided for me! I don't know....it was very laid back and I liked that because i trusted my MW and her medical philospophy and mine meshed (i.e .as natural as possible unless more is needed).

Tess12

I had one.  It wasn't very detailed and I had realistic expectations, but it helped me feel like I had a certain amount of control, even when things ended in a c-section. 

So many people talk about how they regret their birth experience and feel like they weren't given choices.  I have the satisfaction of knowing that I had choices and I wasn't railroaded into any decisions.   It just so happened that Madeleine had her own birth plan and that's the one we went with. lol

howleyshell

Birth plan: ?Get the baby here healthy and keep me alive in the process.

I think birth plans are a bit silly.

I've seen too many friends end up with PPD because they didn't get their "dream birth" and massive hormone fluctuations PP made it hard to grieve and let it go.?

Brewtowngrl

No and i am glad I didn't have one.  I would have been disappointed since nothing went how I thought it would.  only laboring went smooth.  My water ruptured unexpectedly early.  I wanted an epi and that had to wait till I got my antibiotics.  DH wanted to cut the cord, but it was wrapped around DS's neck. I wanted to hold DS right away but he could not breath well.  I wanted to room in, but he was in the NICU. 

schnappycat

mlc92404:

I wanted an Epi, ASAP, that was about it....LOL

?

Yep! This was me, too! That was my only real request. I couldn't care a less about lighting, who was there, etc. as long as I was comfortable and safe and the baby was healthy.?

Temp174496125006552

I did, but it was called my Birth Preferences.  It was one page and detailed things like that I wanted no drugs, was refusing the heplock and IV, wanted to be able to get up out of bed and move around, etc. 

I was being delivered by a MW and she was very in-line with the kind of birth that I wanted (DH and I took HypnoBirthing classes and she was really supportive of that)...but she said it would be a good idea to have something in writing for the other hospital staff.

That being said, my birth 'plan' was ideally how I wanted things to go.  However, I very clearly stated that the most important thing was a healthy baby and mom....however that needed to happen.   If that meant that things needed to happen that I didn't really want, so be it. 

Toni1019

I didnt with any of my births. But I am a very laid back person who takes things as they come. And #3 basically came when she wanted anyways(I went from 4-10cm in 30 minutes), she was half out before the doctor was there, he almost missed it.

Amrice78

I did, but it was very basic - I really didn't want a c-section (had one anyway) and I wanted to labor without meds as much as possible (which I did) and that I wanted ds circ'd and that I wanted to bfeed as soon as possible.

GeoffreytheGiraffe

I did, and it's a darn good thing I did.  My baby was massive.  They did a weight check (usless!) the day before and told me he was going to be 8lbs 4 oz +/- 14 oz.  Well, he was actually 2lbs 4 oz larger than the estimate.

My birth plan was no drugs, no drugs, tub, shower, walk.  THANK GOD no one offered me drugs becuase it hurt like a *** and I SO would have taken them..and by drugs I mean an epidural.  Now if DS had been small, and I had an epi, things would have been fine.

 However, the last 20 minutes of my delivery went to hell in a handbasket and I am SO grateful I was able to move my legs.  If I was unable to move, rotate, get up on all fours, and shake it like a polaroid picture DS's injury would have been much, much, worse..  He was stuck under my public bone, and no episiotomy will cut trough that. (Actually they used to do that in emergencies, but not since like the 1800s)

Anywho, my birth plan was the best thing I did for my son's sake.  For me? Probably not so much.  But I firmly believe it was the difference between Erb's Palsy (an injury to the 6th or 7th brachial plexus nerve) and Cerebal Palsy a brain injury.  And I said it before I'd take a paralyzed arm over a brain deprived of oxygen any.day.

lanie26

Yep. My midwife prepared it with me as we went through the pregnancy.

Because I had midwives I wasn't as concerned. But I couldn't care two hoots about what nurses think about a birth plan. Honestly. I find it pretty shocking that so many think women are "fussy" for wanting to plan.

NewlywednOhio

KKM:

NewlywednOhio:

Yep, I had one, and it was very simple.
I said no forceps, no vacuum, for DS to be circ?d, no interns, MIL and Mom and DH allowed in room only, lighting to be low in room. That?s about it!

so this is my thing...not to attack you NWO, but how can you say you dont want any forceps or vacuums?  They are used and needed for a reason...not just for fun.

It didn?t matter anyway since I ended up having an unplanned c-section. But, my reason behind it was because my friend?s daughter was killed at birth with a forceps. They pulled her the wrong way, and ended up breaking her neck. My choice was more personal, that?s the only reason why I said ?no? to those.
It was very tragic.
 

NJGirlNTheSouth

I did have some basic things written down but after reviewing with my OB- he said it was all pretty standard. He did include it in with my files though because of my pain med preferences.

Epi ASAP -but NO other pain meds (this was important to me b/c I have bad reactions to some). I was afraid if I was in pain- I would not be thinking clearly enough to refuse other meds. Turned out the epi worked great and everything went pretty smooth

 

 

ugabrat@yahoo.com

I did but didn't use it.

Happy Belated Birthday to Brady!

Tess12

lanie26:

Yep. My midwife prepared it with me as we went through the pregnancy.

Because I had midwives I wasn't as concerned. But I couldn't care two hoots about what nurses think about a birth plan. Honestly. I find it pretty shocking that so many think women are "fussy" for wanting to plan.

Also, there are usually certain nurses who like natural births.  So if they see someone with a birth plan, they're likely to take that patient.  I had the most wonderful nurse.  She was British and very open-minded.  She let us have a birthing tub in the room even though we had been told they weren't allowed.

fIowerchild

No, nothing.  You know what they said about the best laid plans....

And I had a wonderful experience that I attribute to not having any pre-conceived notions.

goodtobethelarkster

Two things about how this discussion typically goes on the Nest irk me:

1) I really, really wish it were called a "birth preference sheet." The term birth plan is unfortunate.  It's not a plan like "water breaks at 7.31p, contractions five minutes apart by 10.35p, supportive kiss from husband at 12.05a" or whatever.  It's a list of preferences.  Would you like to shoot for a med free birth?  Do you want the epi as soon as humanly possible?  If you end up with a c-section doyou want your hands tied down?  Do you want the hep B shot for DC?  Do you want to assist in DC's first bath? 

2)  I hate it when birth plans are called a joke.  A woman's preferences about how she'd like her birth experience to go are not a "joke" and it's dismissive to call them that.  Sure it's high maintenance to make a list of 437243 highly specific things or show up with a 75 page plan.  But having a one page list of stuff like "Please put the baby on my chest right after birth if at all possible" or "Please do not offer a pacifier" is neither pathetic nor funny.  Like everyone is saying labor can get crazy.  You might not be in a position to articulate your wishes.  Articulating them ahead of time and in writing in a reasonable fashion can make sense.

fIowerchild

amajane:

I didn't have a birth plan and I am a nurse too. I think they're rather ridiculous and I believe that most L&D nurses feel the same way. I think it's a good idea to clearly state your needs and wants but people who have very specific birth plans come across as very high maintenance (and I try to avoid patients like that).

Oh and God doesn't like it when you have a plan. She laughs and you and will mess with you. 

southernbelle82

Nope.  Just wanted her here safely. Next time I will request that they NOT use morphine (if I have a c/s again)  It made me SO sick!!

I have several friends who are L&D nurses and they can't stand it when people come in with detailed birth plans.

KKM

goodtobethelarkster:

Two things about how this discussion typically goes on the Nest irk me:

1) I really, really wish it were called a "birth preference sheet." The term birth plan is unfortunate.  It's not a plan like "water breaks at 7.31p, contractions five minutes apart by 10.35p, supportive kiss from husband at 12.05a" or whatever.  It's a list of preferences.  Would you like to shoot for a med free birth?  Do you want the epi as soon as humanly possible?  If you end up with a c-section doyou want your hands tied down?  Do you want the hep B shot for DC?  Do you want to assist in DC's first bath? 

2)  I hate it when birth plans are called a joke.  A woman's preferences about how she'd like her birth experience to go are not a "joke" and it's dismissive to call them that.  Sure it's high maintenance to make a list of 437243 highly specific things or show up with a 75 page plan.  But having a one page list of stuff like "Please put the baby on my chest right after birth if at all possible" or "Please do not offer a pacifier" is neither pathetic nor funny.  Like everyone is saying labor can get crazy.  You might not be in a position to articulate your wishes.  Articulating them ahead of time and in writing in a reasonable fashion can make sense.

I guess it is not so much the plan, but when people are upset it doesnt go how they wanted.  I think it is highly appropriate to say all of the things you have listed (no shot, what to do if c-section, no meds/or yes to epi).  I think it is just the ladies that have such a detailed plan then go into it thinking it is going to go exactly how they think it will. 

MrsRhodes2b

I too am a nurse, I don't think having a birth plan is silly, high maint, or asking too much. It is just that A PLAN< and we all know that best laid plans are not always followed! If you keep that in mind, and keep the birth of your child and thier health the highest priority it will be fine.

My birth plan included: no students, low light, patient controlled epidural only when I asked for it, (not to offer), my baby not to go to the nursery unless absolutely nec (she slept in our room), and my DH went along, skin to skin ASAP, no eye ointment until she nursed at least once.

I think that was the hilites, but it went great, and I did not feel like they thought I was trying to be too involved, after all I am the one having the baby!! 

Tess12

goodtobethelarkster:

Two things about how this discussion typically goes on the Nest irk me:

1) I really, really wish it were called a "birth preference sheet." The term birth plan is unfortunate.  It's not a plan like "water breaks at 7.31p, contractions five minutes apart by 10.35p, supportive kiss from husband at 12.05a" or whatever.  It's a list of preferences.  Would you like to shoot for a med free birth?  Do you want the epi as soon as humanly possible?  If you end up with a c-section doyou want your hands tied down?  Do you want the hep B shot for DC?  Do you want to assist in DC's first bath? 

2)  I hate it when birth plans are called a joke.  A woman's preferences about how she'd like her birth experience to go are not a "joke" and it's dismissive to call them that.  Sure it's high maintenance to make a list of 437243 highly specific things or show up with a 75 page plan.  But having a one page list of stuff like "Please put the baby on my chest right after birth if at all possible" or "Please do not offer a pacifier" is neither pathetic nor funny.  Like everyone is saying labor can get crazy.  You might not be in a position to articulate your wishes.  Articulating them ahead of time and in writing in a reasonable fashion can make sense.

I totally agree.

dewdrop1210

No, I trusted my dr & the hospital staff to work in my best interest & my unborn baby.  If I would have prepared a birth plan in advance it would have been trash the day I was induced due to PIH!  Everything spiraled out of my control from that point.

southernbelle82

MrsRhodes2b:

and we all know that best laid plans are not always followed!

That's the problem though.  There are some people who don't realize that. 

Amrice78

and I agree with Larks - I had a bit more on my "plan", but I also stressed that I wanted the docs to do whatever was in the best interest of me and my child, however if everything was going smoothly this is what I'd prefer.  DH didn't get to cut the umbilical cord, but I was okay with that given the cricumstances. FWIW - my nurses loved me

juietbride

Initially I wanted a natural birth, I was going to labor at home for as long as possible and then take a hot shower at the hospital and walk and walk and walk.  But when I was overdue my OB was a little concerned about DS's heart rate during the stress test and knew I was miserable so I had an induction.  When DS's heart rate became a concern it was off to a c-section.  I was just determined to have a healthy baby and DH had his heart set on me being a healthy mom.