WWYD NEW OB? sorry long

LULUNJ

LET'S TRY THIS AGAIN....CRAZY NEST.COM

would you switch ob in my situation?

my ob totally missed the fact that my blood pressure was thru the roof 140 over 90. usually 100 over 70. the nurse saw the problem and told ob who said it was okay and to go home. 3 days later i had a follow up with another doctor for an anesthesia referral. at this appt this new ob realized i had a problem...a big one. severe iugr and the baby was not get oxygen and blood and the heartrate was dropping. i was admitted into hospital and they delivered my baby via c section 8 weeks early. now the question, the ob who found the problem was not very personable or compassionate...however, he saved my babies life. he is a high risk specialist and maybe because of the emergency situation he did not really ease my emotions and kinda said we are "going right now". maybe because there was no time to get into details of what was happening. when my ob got there he ripped her a new one on how she should have seen this problem and also once he saw the chart from my last visit with her he kinda shook his head and said this could have been avoided if i were hospitalized. my thoughts are to switch to him as my new ob. i will need a gigh risk ob anyway and i do not think my current ob is capable as she is totally overwhelmed with patients and 3 hour waits in her office. but part of me hesitates with him because he was blunt and too the point and said if we didnt get the baby out asap the risk of cerebral palsy was greater. would you switch to the doctor who found the problem or start with a whole new doctor? and also, he comes highly recommended as a brilliant doctor who has helped so many but also known to have a cold personality.

kamcfarlane

i had a very similar situation - my OB was awful and didn't handle situations correctly (2 members of her own practice criticized her decisions to me) and the high-risk OBs i saw lacked compassion.

i have since found a regular OB that has high-risk OBs in the same practice. he is a very nice doctor and i have every faith in his abilities. i would keep looking. no reason you have to stick with one of these two doctors. you deserve someone competent AND compassionate. especially when it comes to OB stuff.

 

ijack

In my experience I find the high risk doctors to be VERY matter of fact. When I was admitted just prior to 24w and they thought I would deliver that day, it was really scary to me to be told some of the things that he did, however it was his job to make sure that I knew what was happening. IMO, I would rather have someone who knew what he was doing instead of someone who was compassionate.

GL!

RubyRed7

I am very lucky to have a great OB all around. I would shop around and find one that is a good fit for you! I don't think you have to choose...

KellyMichelle

I think it is important to feel comfortable with your OB.  Do you feel like you could call and ask him questions if you had a problem?  Does he take time to answer questions or just dismiss you?  I think that if you feel like you can voice concerns to him and feel that he really listens to your needs, but is just gruff in his manner then you should go with him.  However if you feel that he will brush you off or that you would be hesitant to call him if a problem arose then I would look for someone else. 

2BWEDN2007

Personally, I would switch if I were you.

He may not seem very personable or compassionate, but his job is to make sure that you and baby are okay not hold your hand and tell you everything will be fine.

My OB has a terrible bedside manner, tells it how it is and many of her former patients (that I am friends with) left her practice because of this. However, she is a phenomenal doctor, an amazing surgeon (I have to have cerclages and c-sections) and really knows what she is doing.

When DS got transferred to the Special Care Nursery at our local hospital from the NICU in Boston I overheard the nurses raving about her and how if she walks into an emergency c-section the entire room relaxes because everyone knows if she is the surgeon everything will be fine.

That was enough for me to stick with her even though she may be lacking in some of the other areas, such as personality.

BrainySmurfette

I would go with Dr. Blunt.  One of my OBs was somewhat lacking in the bedside manner, but that woman saved my life.  I'm alive, and that is all I care about now. When the situation is serious, medical competence matters much more than feelings.  Going to the blunt side myself, it sounds as if your "nice" OB's care would have resulted in your baby dying or having serious, avoidable medical problems.  I would never, ever see a doctor that had screwed up that badly with my care (or any other patients that I knew about).  While the HR OB may not be personable, I think that he will provide much better care.  I would also worry less with this type of doctor, as I would be concerned that the "friendly" doc would overlook important information, fail to fully inform me of things I need to know, or purposely keep information from me to avoid upsetting me.  I'd rather get my feelings hurt, but know I'll get to take my baby home.