My foster son bangs his head against the wall in his sleep :(

MayDayGirl

Other foster moms, does your LO do this?  He rocks in his sleep and kicks his legs, but it makes me SO sad when I catch him banging his head against the wall! Especially cuz he's still sleeping when he does it.

Why do they do this?  And any way I can help him to stop? 

kittylove

Rachel it is normal at his age, it is a self soothing technique. You can ask the pedi about it but I assure you it has nothing to do with the fact that he is in foster care.

MayDayGirl

kittylove:

Rachel it is normal at his age, it is a self soothing technique. You can ask the pedi about it but I assure you it has nothing to do with the fact that he is in foster care.

Are you sure?  His feet are disfigured (so are his brothers) because of the way they sit on them and rock.  I was told it was a coping mechanism.  I assumed the banging of head was too.

MayDayGirl

MayDayGirl:

kittylove:

Rachel it is normal at his age, it is a self soothing technique. You can ask the pedi about it but I assure you it has nothing to do with the fact that he is in foster care.

Are you sure?  His feet are disfigured (so are his brothers) because of the way they sit on them and rock.  I was told it was a coping mechanism.  I assumed the banging of head was too.

I meant coping from the neglect.

kirstenw05

Check with your social worker and see if he qualifies for any programs outside of just standard foster care. Here in CA, kids in foster care can get counseling, developmental programs, etc. to help them recover from their past. It takes persistence, but they should be able to get you connected with what he needs.

BenandSuzy

I too have heard it is a coping mechanism from neglect, etc. ?We adopted our oldest son from Russia and were told that many children do rock or pang their head, because it's the way they self-soothe because they never had anybody help soothe them. ?Our son was not a rocker, but our good friends' son rocked very badly. ?They actually broke him of it before they left Russia. ?However, another close friend, their son rocked for some time after coming home from Russia. ?It is out of neglect and being alone much of the time. ?

I would ask about it and maybe see how to help him overcome that. ?Or with a stable home environment with you, you may see it dissipate over time. ?Good luck.?

kittylove

 

Yes I am sure! My pedi's son does it and so does my niece.

come*on*baby

I wouldn't say it's NOT because he's a foster child. It's a self-soothing technique that most foster children do. Our oldest does it in the car, but she also is ADHD so the sitting still kills her. I would mention it to a caseworker and have you had him evaluated for Speech Therapy, OT and/or PT?

 

How does he go to sleep? Do you rock him? Do you just put him to bed? 

MayDayGirl

come*on*baby:

I wouldn't say it's NOT because he's a foster child. It's a self-soothing technique that most foster children do. Our oldest does it in the car, but she also is ADHD so the sitting still kills her. I would mention it to a caseworker and have you had him evaluated for Speech Therapy, OT and/or PT?

 

How does he go to sleep? Do you rock him? Do you just put him to bed? 

 

we just put him to bed after prayers and hugs and kisses.  He does well, but it's like 5 hours later it starts.