Birth Mother's Day, The Saturday Before Mother's Day

GeoffreytheGiraffe

https://www.boston.com/news/nation/articles/2009/05/03/birth_mothers_day_eases_adoption_grief/

 

Interesting article.  I had never heard of this before. 

jacksjerseygirl

Having not read the above article, our agency sent us information about it a few months ago and a reminder yesterday in a newsletter.

 

PSU-NCBride

I haven't read it either and am running by work in a few so I will have to read it tonight... but I figured that this upcoming week would be hard. I'm not sure what the PC thing is to do around mother's day and would be interested from the other mothers, especially those that have a semi-open adoption like us.?

We aren't planning on sending a special mother's day card, but I'm going to send a regular card, new pictures and an update about how he is adjusting to life at home.?

Opinions? ?

?

Amy720

We do have a semi-open adoption and send letters and pictures 2 times a year.  Unfortunately we didn't have a good relationship like some of you did with our birth mother.  She didn't want to talk to us or meet us.  I understand it was very hard for her.  We think about her often and thank God for her and her decision to let Ben become a part of our lives.

When we sent the last update, the agency said the pictures and letter came back to them so apparently they don't know where she's at now.  Since this is the case, we won't be sending anything extra for Mother's Day.  We'll just do the mandatory letters and pictures twice a year.

JewelzNBean

The past years for me as a birth mother have been different. Each year it is definitely a difficult day - but I find if i don't focus on it, it's fine. I focus on celebrating my own mother. However, since my son has got a bit older (he's 10 now), he has called me on Mother's Day, which is very nice of him, and I always appreciate it. I would feel awkward getting a card or a gift from him though. I usually send his mother a Happy Mother's Day email - but I wonder if that bugs her? When my son was younger, before he really got the concept of Mother's day and calling people and stuff, he didn't call, but sometimes his mother would email me.

Like I said, I try not to focus on it too much, but it's when other's bring it up or try and tiptoe around me on that day that it becomes difficult.

The thing is, I am so happy for his family and his situation - I am not regretful at all. This year will again be different because I am preparing to be a mom to my own child due in July.

As with everything in the adoption, this situation is one that is constantly evolving and changing.