Where did all this grief and sadness come from?

ashleyb0604

I am not typically a very emotional person, but it seems like since the m/c I am so much more sensitive when it comes to feeling sadness and crying. I'm sure it has something to do with hormone fluctuations and the like, but I think a lot of it is true emotion - and I just don't know how to handle it!

I come from a very close tight-knit family...always said I was raised by a village b/c that's how it felt. My mom has four sisters and had a brother and they all have always felt like an extension of my parents or like big sisters/brother. Two days after Christmas my uncle died suddenly at 36 after a routine appendectomy, leaving behind a 9 month old baby boy who he had waited his whole life for. It was the first time our family has experienced a loss like that since my great grandpa died when I was very little.

I felt like I grieved at the time, but every since my m/c I feel like I think about him all the time. I get so sad and will just cry out of nowhere and I don't know if it's about the baby or my uncle or both. I am just so angry and it feels so unreal. Why do these things happen to the best people who deserve to live? Why did WE have to lose our baby?

I know these are things people deal with all the time, but I just feel really overwhelmed right now. Like I can't wrap my head around it and get to a place where I can be okay with it. I'm sorry - I just needed a place to say these things out loud. Thank you ladies!

thewarrens

Oh yeah...  Grief comes & goes with absolutely no rhyme or reason.  And, when it comes it is usually in BIG tidal waves.  I'm sorry for your loss & the loss of your Uncle.  :::BIG HUGS:::  You'll be in my prayers.

Mia07

I'm so sorry about your losses and I hope your day gets better. 

I used to be the opposite of emotional, but ever since losing Sophi, I pretty much tear up at anything now (sad songs, the news, movies, etc).  So I know where you're coming from.  Just know that its healthy to get those emotions out, and that you're not alone.

((HUGS)) 

BigSar1

I was never much of a cryer before my MC. Last night I burned my arm with hot water while cooking pasta and I started to cry and couldn't stop for like 45 minutes!

ade2be

HUGS!! I'm so sorry you've had to go through all of that. One thing hitting you is bad enough, but when they come in groups, it really sucks.

Grief does come in waves with me.....4 months after the fact and I have days that I just can't get past it and get really angry.  I was a typically happy-go-lucky person up until my miscarriage.  I have found since the mc, my personality has totally changed. 

~HopeAndFaith~

Uggh...why oh why?  I can't believe that the pain can be so great. 

I am so sorry!  Unfortunately, I have no other words for you.  Both circumstances are fairly new and well..........you know.

I am truly sorry.  I hope you find some peace.

Blessed1010

Ashley, I am so sorry for both of your losses.  I wish I was more eloquent and had more to share but all I can say is that you are in my thoughts.  I truly am very sorry. 

mrs_tacos

(((BIG HUGS))) I am so sorry you have t go through this, but know that I am right there with you! Any mention of death or sight of a pg woman or baby, and the water works come...I even cried in class yesterday b/c we watched a movie with a birthing scene in it where the baby dies. I had to rush to the bathroom before anyone saw me bawling my eyes out. I don't know why the grief is so much stronger than other griefs- I suppose it's because when you loose your baby, you loose something that is innately a part of yourself. Everyone promises me it does get better with time, though. You will be in my prayers today!

Jacquiemark

((HUGS)) I am so sorry that you are going through this. Like others have said, the grief comes and goes. It is always a complete rollercoaster. I feel like my personality has changed a little as someone else mentioned as well. I seem to be able to get in a depressive state easier and it is harder to cheer me up. I am just not as happy as I used to be and I have a hard time concentrating and focusing on things. I have to believe that things will get better but we may be forever changed a little. Sending prayers your way,

jen-dale

The Warrens:

Oh yeah...  Grief comes & goes with absolutely no rhyme or reason.  And, when it comes it is usually in BIG tidal waves.  I'm sorry for your loss & the loss of your Uncle.  :::BIG HUGS:::  You'll be in my prayers.

I couldn't agree more! Don't be too hard on yourself.((hugs))