Labor and delivery will be the first time I leave my son overnight!

bebemama

What a ridiculous thing to pass judgement on. ?I have no need/desire to leave my son overnight. ?My husband go out for dinner and drinks every now and then, we have friends over for dinner, we have friends over after putting him to bed and we have romantic dinners after his 7 o'clock bedroom. ?

I also know my son would be terribly upset and scared if someone else was to go to him in the night if he woke since normally he only wakes when he is sick or teething. ?I sometimes have a hard time consoling him. ?

That would be the last thing I would ever think someone would pass judgement about.

And....I hope to have my baby during daylight hours so my husband can go and be with our son for the night. ?I do...I am THAT bad of a mother. ?

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mbg8r

But see, that is the whole point. I don't want my kids freaking out if I'm not there if they wake at night, but I'm lucky to have an incredible sitter and my parents close by that can take or sit with them.

MrsStubbs

Do you have family close? I think that makes a difference.

mbg8r

And it's not like we leave them that often. DH and I were just saying that we need to leave DD with my parents for a night soon because it's been a few months and I don't want her to forget how to stay away from home.

august06mom

bebemama:

What a ridiculous thing to pass judgement on.  I have no need/desire to leave my son overnight.  My husband go out for dinner and drinks every now and then, we have friends over for dinner, we have friends over after putting him to bed and we have romantic dinners after his 7 o'clock bedroom.  

I also know my son would be terribly upset and scared if someone else was to go to him in the night if he woke since normally he only wakes when he is sick or teething.  I sometimes have a hard time consoling him.  

That would be the last thing I would ever think someone would pass judgement about.

And....I hope to have my baby during daylight hours so my husband can go and be with our son for the night.  I do...I am THAT bad of a mother.  

 

 

How do you know if you've never left him? I thought my DS would be upset, too. Turns out he loved having his Nana and Papa "sleepovers." I don't really care much about this debate, but I think some parents don't give their kids enough credit. If you don't want to leave them for a night, fine -- but how do you know they'll fall to pieces if you've never tried it?

xbrooklyngrl

I'm not even PG but think of this often too since I never left B. I know that if I did leave her, she'd be fine, even if she woke up middle of the night (which she often does), she'd eventually calm down.

Other than me not wanting/needing to leave her, I also never did it because she did wake up a lot as a baby and until she was two and sometimes still does and I never wanted to "bother" anyone else with it.

brightning

Don't feel bad, I've never left DD overnight, either. Despite this, I'm pretty sure she's a well-adjusted child. We have no family here. We have a few friends who have babysat her for hours-long stretches. The only time we've gone somewhere overnight, DD has gone with us. I'm not afraid to leave her, it's just never come up.

stacynikki

I've never left DS overnight and I am not worried about him adjusting or needing to.  If I happen to have the next baby at night and my parents or Dh's parents have to keep DS overnight I'm not worried that he'll freak out.  And if he does happen to freak I'm sure it won't scar him for life.  Besides, my Dad always got up with DS in the mornings when they were staying with us and DS didn't think twice about it.

DH and I have plenty of evenings out and plenty of alone time after DS goes to bed.  I don't plan on leaving DS overnight until I deliver #2.  I don't overthink having to have DS adjusted to anything I guess.  And this is in no way saying anything to the OP.  If you don't want to leave your child overnight with anyone, whether your mom lives two doors down or not, I don't think that anyone has the right to judge you because of it.  And it doesn't make you any less of a mom for not wanting to go away overnight.

bebemama

august06mom:

bebemama:

What a ridiculous thing to pass judgement on. ?I have no need/desire to leave my son overnight. ?My husband go out for dinner and drinks every now and then, we have friends over for dinner, we have friends over after putting him to bed and we have romantic dinners after his 7 o'clock bedroom. ?

I also know my son would be terribly upset and scared if someone else was to go to him in the night if he woke since normally he only wakes when he is sick or teething. ?I sometimes have a hard time consoling him. ?

That would be the last thing I would ever think someone would pass judgement about.

And....I hope to have my baby during daylight hours so my husband can go and be with our son for the night. ?I do...I am THAT bad of a mother. ?

?

?

How do you know if you've never left him? I thought my DS would be upset, too. Turns out he loved having his Nana and Papa "sleepovers." I don't really care much about this debate, but I think some parents don't give their kids enough credit. If you don't want to leave them for a night, fine -- but how do you know they'll fall to pieces if you've never tried it?

?

I said he is difficult for me to console. ?I highly doubt that he would be easily comforted by someone other then his mother. ?Besides, I said I don't have the desire to be away from my son for a night. ?I had lots of nights to be free before he was born. ?

Also, I don't feel I need to condition him to handle being comforted by himself during this hypothetical night waking (he would likely sleep through the night anyway). ?When he is old enough to want to spend the night at someones house it is very likely this will no longer be a possible problem. ??