moms of 2-3 year olds

jtbmommy

Can your dc be really whiny?  Lately at night ds (28 mo) has been very whiny. If you ask a question about his day that he doesn't feel like answering he'll say nooo- mommy don't talk to me... or strating fake crying. I'm not sure how to handle this. I don't mind if he doesn't always want to talk after school (I know sometimes I am tired and don't feel like talking) but he also needs to talk nice to people.

ALso-

Do you ignore dc when they are having a tantrum/meltdown? A few times lately he doesn't know what he wants and won't tell me (he is a very good talker so I know he has the words). dh said if he's not telling you wants he wants and just crying to ignore him. I'm trying to do that because I know he can ask he just needs to pull himself together.

Last night he went to bed screaming because he was upset about getting his hair washed, threw his toy and didn't get it back because he didn't ask nicely and then was too upset to pick a bedtime story. I told him to pick one and suggested a few of his favrites and he screamed no and cried on the floor. SO we counted to three and he didn't move( well he moved when we got to 2 but then stopped and layed there. So we counted again and he didn't move. SO into bed with a few books but no story. I felt like an awful mother but he does need to know the limits right. Hovering over him and asking what is wrong and offering choices doesn't work when he yells no at all the choices.

normal terrible twos? advice??????

AnnapolisLari

My son is exactly the same age, and is a whining fool. It's totally normal.

 

VivaAmore

We're in the midst of a tough week or two, or three! She's been very irritable and feisty and I can't figure out if it's the last two top molars that I saw popping through, her being tired because she hasn't been napping well and has been going to bed late, or just normal 2's stuff. Most likely it's a combination of all of the above.

I try to be compassionate at first but when she abuses it and starts being fresh to me, or even starts throwing toys or hitting us, I'm done. We warn her that if her behavior continues she'll get a time out or we'll take away a luxury (night time book, snack, etc.). It feels horrible to do that but I think they need to learn that this behavior is not acceptable and will have consequences. I'll then stand my ground and ignore what I can of the rest. 

Zenya

DS can definitely be whiney.  I say "I don't understand you when you whine" and ignore him until he changes his tone.

His tantrums are usually for a reason.  Like your child was obviously just exhausted.  If my son has a tantum b/c he's exhausted I hold him and walk him around if he'll let me.  I generally feel like it's my 'fault' (didn'tn read his cues enough) and so I don't ignore them or otherwise punish him for them.  But sometimes he isn't comforted by me and then he just has to cry.  But I'll stay  near and he knows I'm available for him if he wants.

I don't tolerate screaming though.  If he screams during his tantrum I tell him it hurts my ears and has to do it in his bedroom.

Starr_Mom

I think you're doing the right thing. Yes, he's going to have times when he is just cranky, but he needs to understand that that doesn't mean that you will deal with his bad moods and tantrums. Now if I can just get my DS to stop doing the same thing, we would all be in business. Just remember... this too shall pass.

firefightersgal

Um, yeah.  Nora is whining a LOT lately.  Oh, and getting upset over every.little.thing.  It's making me nuts.