Birth Stories

Poll: Did you have a homebirth?

There are not many people in the US who have homebirths, but I have seen a couple of homebirth stories on here.  So, who had a homebirth and did you use a CPM, CNM or go unassisted?
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Re: Poll: Did you have a homebirth?

  • I had a homebirth a little over a year ago with a CNM.  It was an amazing experience!
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  • My son was born at home with the assistance of a CPM on 3/16/09/ My birth story was posted here (I think it's down a page now).
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  • My baby isn't due until July, but my husband and I are planning a home water birth. We have a CPM that will be attending me, as well as my mom who is a licensed mw in California. I wish there were more hb moms on here. I asked the bump gods for a natural/homebirthing board, but so far, no luck. Sigh!

     

    PS Your beautiful son was born on my birthday. I was also born at home on 3/31 :)

  • Oh how cool!!!  Good luck on your HB and that would be really, really cool to find more 'like' moms on the Bump!  I can't wait to read your birth story!
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  • I can hopefully share my homebirth story in a matter of days!  I am due today and we are planning on a homebirth with a CNM. 

    I agree about starting a board for homebirth....its nice to find other homebirth mommies that can really share in the experience.  I love hearing all the drug free birth stories...its very inspirational!

  • I really like the functionality of the Bump site, but I have to share that I have found other message boards that do have homebirth and natural birth boards. Mothering.com has quite a few: natural birth, homebirth, the case against circumcision, and a few other boards for us "crunchy, alternative" mamas. Justmommies.com also has natural and homebirth boards. Neither site is quite as active as the bump, but it is really nice to find some other moms who share and support your views. I don't know about you ladies, but I get really tired of reading all the birth stories that start with an induction for no reason and end at the bottom of "cascade effect" hill with a c/s. It just makes me really sad that these women have no idea what that experience could have been like :(
  • We are due mid-Sept. and plan on birthing at home with CPM. So excited!
  • I totally agree with you about the cascade of events that occurs in the typical birth story in this country.  It really must say something when I, as an obstetrical nurse in a hospital, choose NOT to have my baby in a hospital because I see firsthand just how bad it is!  And women are clueless...
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  • A friend of mine just had an unassisted homebirth, just she and her husband. I loved hearing her birth story! I would have loved to have a homebirth but, sadly, my husband is too squeamish about blood and such. Nebraska is one of the states that doesn't allow CNMs to attend homebirths *sigh* ?So I had my baby in the hospital with my CNM.?

    I agree a homebirth/natural birth board would be great, and I also enjoy reading other's homebirth stories!

  • imageGermanwife2b:
    I totally agree with you about the cascade of events that occurs in the typical birth story in this country.  It really must say something when I, as an obstetrical nurse in a hospital, choose NOT to have my baby in a hospital because I see firsthand just how bad it is!  And women are clueless...

    A lot of these women are more than clueless. For some, they are down right irresponsible and I can't imagine handing over my body and my baby to some OB just because they went to med school without questioning any the motivations behind those birth choices. Giving birth is an experience you can never get back again. And that is pretty telling that if you, as an OB nurse, can't stand to have your baby in the hospital, then something is wrong. I had read, either on a bump board or another, about a woman's OB who had hb for her 4 kids. I think if you are an OB and you can't stomach a hospital birth, maybe you are in the wrong profession. . .

  • I frequently think I am in the wrong profession too, but I justify working there for the last 10 years by the fact that I chose not to do labor and delivery but actually do high-risk antepartum and post-partum.  These women are high-risk, need intervention and belong in the hospital.  That makes me feel better.  Plus, although my heart is in the natural birth setting, there just is no money in that and right now, I am the only one bringing home a paycheck (DH got laid off in Jan).  Sad to say, but hospital nursing pays and I am darn good at what I do...so I will stay.  But, I am always offering to be a doula for friends who want to try to go natural.  Most of my friends just aren't interested.  I can't wait to hear about your birth!
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  • I was in no way judging your choice of profession. It sounds like what you do is specialized and important care for women who need it. It is just unfortunate how many women probably don't need to be in a hospital in the first place. And it makes me sad to see how few women trust their bodies and their hearts. My mom was "alternative" for choosing home birth when she had me 25 years ago and it is still considered "crunchy and alternative" now. I guess birthing culture in our society hasn't progressed much in the last quarter century :(
  • imageGoldmanBaby09:

    My baby isn't due until July, but my husband and I are planning a home water birth. We have a CPM that will be attending me, as well as my mom who is a licensed mw in California. I wish there were more hb moms on here. I asked the bump gods for a natural/homebirthing board, but so far, no luck. Sigh!

    ?

    PS Your beautiful son was born on my birthday. I was also born at home on 3/31 :)

    ?

    We're planning ?a home water birth in July too! There are other homebirth Moms on here...just not all in one place.?

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  • imageGoldmanBaby09:

    imageGermanwife2b:
    I totally agree with you about the cascade of events that occurs in the typical birth story in this country.  It really must say something when I, as an obstetrical nurse in a hospital, choose NOT to have my baby in a hospital because I see firsthand just how bad it is!  And women are clueless...

    A lot of these women are more than clueless. For some, they are down right irresponsible and I can't imagine handing over my body and my baby to some OB just because they went to med school without questioning any the motivations behind those birth choices. Giving birth is an experience you can never get back again. And that is pretty telling that if you, as an OB nurse, can't stand to have your baby in the hospital, then something is wrong. I had read, either on a bump board or another, about a woman's OB who had hb for her 4 kids. I think if you are an OB and you can't stomach a hospital birth, maybe you are in the wrong profession. . .

     

    You know - not all women that have babies in the hospital are "clueless".  You shouldn't make such blanket statements.  Unfortunately I might HAVE to have mine in the hospital.  Because of another surgery years ago - I might not be able to have a vaginal birth.  And I am not clueless.

  • imagebrownmouse:
    imageGoldmanBaby09:

    My baby isn't due until July, but my husband and I are planning a home water birth. We have a CPM that will be attending me, as well as my mom who is a licensed mw in California. I wish there were more hb moms on here. I asked the bump gods for a natural/homebirthing board, but so far, no luck. Sigh!

     

    PS Your beautiful son was born on my birthday. I was also born at home on 3/31 :)


     

    We're planning  a home water birth in July too! There are other homebirth Moms on here...just not all in one place. 

     

    I knew you were planning a home birth, too, Brownmouse. You are one of the few I have seen post on the tri boards about it. That is why we need a board of our own so that mamas who feel the same can have some place to go and feel safe and supported in discussing our birthing choices. 

  • imageMLC29:
    imageGoldmanBaby09:

    imageGermanwife2b:
    I totally agree with you about the cascade of events that occurs in the typical birth story in this country.  It really must say something when I, as an obstetrical nurse in a hospital, choose NOT to have my baby in a hospital because I see firsthand just how bad it is!  And women are clueless...

    A lot of these women are more than clueless. For some, they are down right irresponsible and I can't imagine handing over my body and my baby to some OB just because they went to med school without questioning any the motivations behind those birth choices. Giving birth is an experience you can never get back again. And that is pretty telling that if you, as an OB nurse, can't stand to have your baby in the hospital, then something is wrong. I had read, either on a bump board or another, about a woman's OB who had hb for her 4 kids. I think if you are an OB and you can't stomach a hospital birth, maybe you are in the wrong profession. . .

     

    You know - not all women that have babies in the hospital are "clueless".  You shouldn't make such blanket statements.  Unfortunately I might HAVE to have mine in the hospital.  Because of another surgery years ago - I might not be able to have a vaginal birth.  And I am not clueless.

     I didn't say that all women who have hospital births are clueless. There is a time and a place for hospital births. But the vast majority of women who have normal, healthy, low risk pregnancies do not need medical intervention to have their babies. Period. And I get sickened by the fact that a lot of these women spend more time pondering which pack n' play to register for than they do researching alternatives and questioning their birth choices. I'm sorry that your personal circumstances may lead you to a hospital birth, and I hope that if that is the case, you can get the best out of that experience that you can.

  • And what happens when something goes wrong? I was one of those women "who have normal, healthy, low risk pregnanacies" and would never been able to birth at home since a c/s was medically necessary in a hurry.  Don't be sorry that that I had to have a hospital birth, I wouldn't have done it any other way because of the risk of not having modern medicine available should something go wrong.  I didn't want to have a c/s and would have much rather done the whole thing med free, but that didn't turn out to be the way that things worked.  There are women on here whose babies would have died had they not been hooked up to monitors in the hospital.  I don't judge your choice even though its not for me, don't judge mine.
  • imageSam78:
    And what happens when something goes wrong? I was one of those women "who have normal, healthy, low risk pregnanacies" and would never been able to birth at home since a c/s was medically necessary in a hurry.  Don't be sorry that that I had to have a hospital birth, I wouldn't have done it any other way because of the risk of not having modern medicine available should something go wrong.  I didn't want to have a c/s and would have much rather done the whole thing med free, but that didn't turn out to be the way that things worked.  There are women on here whose babies would have died had they not been hooked up to monitors in the hospital.  I don't judge your choice even though its not for me, don't judge mine.

    Look, I'm not interested in addressing everyone's personal situation. And again, I never said that absolutely every woman should have her baby at home. I said there was a time and place for hospital birth. And things do go wrong with home birth. But that is why you hire a skilled birth attendant who understands and recognizes when a birth is not progressing normally and takes the appropriate steps to protect the mother and child. Some times this involves transport, some times it doesn't. And midwives do monitor both mother and baby very closely during labor. Ob's are not the only ones who can listen to fetal heart tones. But there are many women who don't even bother to question asinine policies like "my OB won't let me go longer than 41 weeks", which has no medical justification at all. It is that mentality that I do not understand. But ultimately, where ever you feel safest is where you should give birth. For some women, they feel they need the hospital to feel safe. But for me, there is no where I would rather be than my own home.

  • imageGoldmanBaby09:

    imageSam78:
    And what happens when something goes wrong? I was one of those women "who have normal, healthy, low risk pregnanacies" and would never been able to birth at home since a c/s was medically necessary in a hurry.  Don't be sorry that that I had to have a hospital birth, I wouldn't have done it any other way because of the risk of not having modern medicine available should something go wrong.  I didn't want to have a c/s and would have much rather done the whole thing med free, but that didn't turn out to be the way that things worked.  There are women on here whose babies would have died had they not been hooked up to monitors in the hospital.  I don't judge your choice even though its not for me, don't judge mine.

    Look, I'm not interested in addressing everyone's personal situation. And again, I never said that absolutely every woman should have her baby at home. I said there was a time and place for hospital birth. And things do go wrong with home birth. But that is why you hire a skilled birth attendant who understands and recognizes when a birth is not progressing normally and takes the appropriate steps to protect the mother and child. Some times this involves transport, some times it doesn't. And midwives do monitor both mother and baby very closely during labor. Ob's are not the only ones who can listen to fetal heart tones. But there are many women who don't even bother to question asinine policies like "my OB won't let me go longer than 41 weeks", which has no medical justification at all. It is that mentality that I do not understand. But ultimately, where ever you feel safest is where you should give birth. For some women, they feel they need the hospital to feel safe. But for me, there is no where I would rather be than my own home.

    The problem I have with what you are saying is that you said you were sorry that someone went to the hospital or would have to go to the hospital - that relays that you disapprove or dislike the choice that the person made.  Like I said, I don't judge your choice even though its not for me, but don't look down on me (by feeling sorry for me) for making the choice that I did.

  • I do feel badly for anyone who longed for a home birth but couldn't have one, for one reason or another. And I am sorry that you ended up with a c section that you didn't want and didn't anticipate. There are many women who walk around with not only physical but emotional scars from the things that happened to them while giving birth to their children. And some of those women go on to have home births for their subsequent babies because they were so unhappy with the experience they had the first time. It isn't condescension; I genuinely do feel bad. But if you don't support home birth and have no intentions of having one, I don't really feel that you should be commenting on a post for women who do. Our main gripe is that there is not a forum here to discuss our views without having to defend our choice to anyone who feels the need to add their two cents.
  • "But there are many women who don't even bother to question asinine policies like "my OB won't let me go longer than 41 weeks", which has no medical justification at all""

    Well, I have actually done what you yourself recommend about educating myself about birth and delivery, and what I have found indiciates that stillbirth rates are higher amongst women who go past 41 weeks.  So maybe there IS a justification for that? I will not be happy going past 41 weeks.  It will make me stressed out.

    I figure, if you don't trust your health care provider, you shouldn't be using that provider.  So pick one that you trust, and go from there.  I can find information on the internet and in books, and then find something that completey contradicts it somewhere else.  I put my faith in my doctor's experience, as many put their faith in their midwives, and I don't think it makes sense to think they're an idiot for doing so.

    In addition, I think it's good to remember that not everyone cares about their birth experience like others do.  Some are devastated by a C-Section; others could care less.  Personally, I want a live baby, and other than that, I don't really care what happens.  So you don't necessarily need to pity everyone who doesn't have what you feel is the ideal birh experience.  Give your sympathy to those who are upset about theirs, and don't worry about everyone else.

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  • There may be an increased occurrence of stillbirth after 41 weeks, but a blanket policy to induce all women at 41 weeks is not based specifically on you, your pregnancy, or your baby. Your individual circumstances can be different (i.e your EDD was off from the beginning) which do not make that medically justified on a case-by-case basis, which is how all women should be treated, as individuals. If some women want to put their total faith in such medicalization, then by all mean, do it. But that is not the choice I am interested in making. 

     And if you don't give a *** about your birth, then good for you. But some of us out there care greatly about that experience, and for those of us who do, we want to be free to have our babies without intervention in the calm privacy of our homes. And again, if you aren't interest in having a  home birth or supporting it, what is it to you? I'm done posting to people butting in with their opinions when the original poster was just looking for other LIKE MINDED mamas.

  • "But there are many women who don't even bother to question asinine policies like "my OB won't let me go longer than 41 weeks", which has no medical justification at all""   No medical justification?  So when going too far past your due date could result in an increased risk of:  placenta deterioration, pinched umbilical cord, meconium aspiration, fetal distress, etc - that's not medical justification?    "A lot of these women are more than clueless. For some, they are down right irresponsible and I can't imagine handing over my body and my baby to some OB just because they went to med school without questioning any the motivations behind those birth choices."   "And I get sickened by the fact that a lot of these women spend more time pondering which pack n' play to register for than they do researching alternatives and questioning their birth choices"   Did you stop to think that maybe they DON'T have a choice?  So you're automatically judging someone for pondering what P&P to get and assuming they are "down right irresponsible"   I'm sorry but if you're not meaning to address anyone?s personal situation, then you shouldn't make statements such as the above.  

     

  • You think that by my going to a hospital that I am not getting my care based on MY personal needs?  Who is the uneducated one now?
  • imageGoldmanBaby09:

    There may be an increased occurrence of stillbirth after 41 weeks, but a blanket policy to induce all women at 41 weeks is not based specifically on you, your pregnancy, or your baby. Your individual circumstances can be different (i.e your EDD was off from the beginning) which do not make that medically justified on a case-by-case basis, which is how all women should be treated, as individuals. If some women want to put their total faith in such medicalization, then by all mean, do it. But that is not the choice I am interested in making. 

     And if you don't give a *** about your birth, then good for you. But some of us out there care greatly about that experience, and for those of us who do, we want to be free to have our babies without intervention in the calm privacy of our homes. And again, if you aren't interest in having a  home birth or supporting it, what is it to you? I'm done posting to people butting in with their opinions when the original poster was just looking for other LIKE MINDED mamas.

    I agree with what you're saying in regards to medical care being case-by-case.  I very much agree with that.  I am happy to have found an OBGYN who does seem to cater to the invidivual woman.

    And what is it to me?  Well, I was genuinely interested in reading about home births, although I could never do one myself (too anxiety-ridden to be out of a hospital setting).  However, when I read the post and saw things that seemed to bash anyone who did this or that, I thought it would be okay to respond.  Public forum and all.

     Nothing I said was meant to come out sounding snotty, so I apologize if it did.  I was just trying to give another side of the story, another opinion.  Why feel sorry for women (who didn't have an "ideal" birth experience) if they don't feel sorry for themselves?

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  • I, like Hoping, came into this thread to read about it because I find it interesting.  I never said I was against home birth, I said it wasn't for me.  I really don't care where you birth although I always hope that everyone has a much better experience than I did.  Also, I, like Hoping, felt the need to jump in when you were pitying those people who do not share your views and was greatly offended by some of what you were saying.  I do agree with some of what you are saying such as that there shouldn't be a blanket policy of induction at X weeks, but to condemn the entire medical establishment based on some physicians' choice to put such a blanket policy in place is ridiculous (not to mention that such a blanket policy is ridiculous on its face because how is someone going to induce me without my consent?).

    I sincerely hope that you have a wonderful home birthing experience, but would appreciate you not judging me based on my less than wonderful experience in a hospital which is the only place I felt comfortable.

  • imageSam78:

     (not to mention that such a blanket policy is ridiculous on its face because how is someone going to induce me without my consent?).

    This is a good point.

    Mind you, my doctor isn't a very "blanket policy" kind of guy, which is why I chose him....but this is good advice for everyone to keep in mind.

    I have severe tailbone pain, and I don't intend to push while lying on my back.  Someone said to me 'Well, doctors ONLY 'let' you push while on your back".  Yeah, good for them.  And when I'm on all fours pushing the baby out in the middle of a contraction, is my tiny doctor REALLY going to be able to physically move me into a preferred position?  I doubt it.

    I realize that was completely off-topic, but I think it's something to keep in mind.  Also, if you hear about a "blanket policy" you don't like, from a doctor or midwife or whatever, please bring it up ahead of time.  The less surprises on delivery day, the better!

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  • After the horrifying hospital birth I had, I wish I had had a home birth. (my incredibly long birth story is posted on the birth story page)

    Next time I will definitely go to a midwife, not a OB. I'm not sure I would be comfortable having the baby at home since I did get sick with my first baby, but I would definitely look into having it at a birthing center.

    ?

  • imageHopingForOne:
    imageSam78:

     (not to mention that such a blanket policy is ridiculous on its face because how is someone going to induce me without my consent?).

    This is a good point.

    Mind you, my doctor isn't a very "blanket policy" kind of guy, which is why I chose him....but this is good advice for everyone to keep in mind.

    I have severe tailbone pain, and I don't intend to push while lying on my back.  Someone said to me 'Well, doctors ONLY 'let' you push while on your back".  Yeah, good for them.  And when I'm on all fours pushing the baby out in the middle of a contraction, is my tiny doctor REALLY going to be able to physically move me into a preferred position?  I doubt it.

    I realize that was completely off-topic, but I think it's something to keep in mind.  Also, if you hear about a "blanket policy" you don't like, from a doctor or midwife or whatever, please bring it up ahead of time.  The less surprises on delivery day, the better!

     

    You do realize that by getting an epidural you won't be able to push on all fours correct? Just asking, because that is the reason women have to push on their backs (which is the worst position to give birth in) because they are hooked up to IV's and epidurals and you can't move your lower body

  • 1) I pushed on all fours with the epi (as well as a number of other positions)- depends on what level you have it at - I didn't feel pain, but could still move around and control my legs

    2) this link was posted on another board and thought that it might be of interest to those posting in here: https://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/7998417.stm

  • we will be having a homebirth/waterbirth!
  • Wow!  I posted a poll and don't check it for a few days and see this.  Wow!  I will add my 2 cents without trying to offend anyone too much.  I work in a hospital.  I work in obstetrics.  I've worked L&D and NICU and currently work with high-risk pregnancies and postpartum.  I've done research after research after research and know for a FACT that the way we birth women in this country is WRONG and I pity the women who do not know any better and therefore have a bad birthing experience because they truly do not know that x can cause y which can lead to z (i.e the cascade of events that lead to c-sections as one example).  I see it all of the time in my hospital and with my friends and it makes me a little sick.  The hospital is a GREAT place if you are truly high-risk but I firmly believe that for a low-risk pregnancy, the hospital by virtue of the many interventions so routinely done, turns you into a high risk patient with the initiation of that first intervention (whatever it may be).  I've seen labors go bad and I've seen pregnancies go bad and that still did not deter me from having a homebirth.  Most of the labors that have gone bad, went bad after the cascade of interventions started.  Rarely have I seen a natural labor go bad.  My midwives have been in practice over 20 years, have a 7% c-section rate, a 5-10% transfer to the hospital rate (they only do birthing center or home births) and those transfers are almost always non-emergent, and have NEVER been sued in 20+ years and have amazing outcomes!  These are better statistics than anything I have ever seen in my hospital and with my doctors in my hospital.  My hospital has pretty standard statistics as compared with any other hospital.  Soooo, going with the statistics, I was at less risk for surgery and all that comes with it, less risk of needing drugs or an epidural and a greater risk for having a live, healthy baby and mommy by going with the midwives doing a home/birthing center birth than by doing a hospital birth with a hospital attendant.

    And to address the poster who asked, what if something went wrong?  Well, good news, midwives are trained professionals who can pick-up when something is going wrong.  Rarely babies go bad fast...unless there have been interventions (in that case I have seen babies go bad really fast-I've seen babies go bad fast after mom gets her epidural).  They usually start to give signs that midwives are trained to pick up and then that puts you into the high-risk category and you must transfer to a hospital for needed intervention.  They carry all of the supplies we have in the hospital.  My midwives required I had oxygen in my house by 36 weeks.  My midwives carried pitocin, methergine, cytotec and other things in case of increased bleeding (the exact things we give in the hospital if a mom starts to bleed).  They even carried herbal things which helped when I had a terrible charlie horse during my labor.  All in all, this is a SAFE option.  There are studies out there to prove that a homebirth is as safe or safer than a hospital birth for low -risk women.  As soon as we stop doing unneeded intervention in hospitals, we might start seeing better outcomes in this country because ladies...this country SUCKS with maternal and infant health compared to other countries who use mostly midwives and do homebirths.

    And about women who are clueless...many women in this country who go to have their baby do not know the risks of the commonday procedures that are done daily, hourly and by the minute in most hospitals in this country.  They truly have no idea that x can cause y which can lead to z.  I believe that all women should birth with the information and with a little research under their belt.  That way women can make INFORMED decisions about their birth and their babies.  I don't think hospitals and many medical professionals are informing their patients of all of the risks that are involved...and it makes no sense to me.

    Ok- I have so much more to say but I am going to stop here.  I am passionate about this topic as you can see, but I am mostly passionate about women making choices that are based on research based evidence- and not just trusting a medical professional who might make a decision based on when he/she wants to go to bed or be home in time for dinner (read the research...there is evidence to show that this happens).

    And by the way...I only wanted to know if there are other women on this board who are like me and chose a homebirth...and I think that it is perfectly fine under this specific poll to talk about how we feel regarding the other options.  We are a minority in this country so please let us have a small thread where we can speak about this subject with like-minded people without the interruption of people who just don't agree.  Thanks.

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  • You mention "in this country"...well, I am not from the USA.  I do know that USA's C-Section rate is about twice as high as in Canada and Britain, so their neonatal death rate is twice as high as well (not that one has anything to do with the other).  So I am going to apologize for not keeping that in mind while discussing this topic.

     

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  • Learning more about homebirth is actually what made me feel comfortable enough to TTC.  I was raised being given homeopathic remedies and natural-care and only went to doctors when I was really, really, really ill.  I grew up being told that if you can take care of yourself or heal yourself naturally there is no need for a doctor, but they are there when you need them.  So obviously my association with doctors isn't very positive, hence why childbirth never really interested me- I hated the thought of having to do all of this in that sort of setting.  Then I started learning more about homebirth and it really made me feel better about the whole thing.

    My body was built to have babies.  There's nothing wrong with my body (I'm pretty sure).  Therefor, using what I learned growing up- there is no need for a doctor and a hospital.  I will use a CNM and go for a homebirth (when/if the time comes).  And if something goes wrong- that's what OBs are for- to help out in emergencies.

    To me, I think women over-think pregnancy.  If you keep thinking this, this, this, and that can and probably will go wrong- it probably will go wrong.  I think sometimes our minds can cause problems that aren't really there or wouldn't have been there if we hadn't over-thought it. 

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