Pregnant for first time after 40?

BellyDancrBride

I'm new here.   My hubby & I just recently made the decision to have a baby.  Long story that I won't go into, but finally the time is right.  We are so excited, and we are busy getting our bodies as healthy as we can to conceive.

 I'm 41, and he is 29.  I've been doing a lot of reading online & off, and I realize that being over 40 doesn't make having a healthy baby SUPER risky.  It is just more risky than it is for younger women.  Unfortunately, we are both overweight so losing weight is first on the agenda, but that will take time.  I plan to see my OB/GYN within the next few weeks for my preconception appt so I will be most interested in how long she thinks we may need to wait before throwing the birth control pills out the window.

High blood pressure & diabetes run in my family so I figure (and worry!) that I'm a sitting duck for preeclamsia & gestational diabetes.  I've been waiting to lose the weight that I gained since the wedding 4 years ago, and it has been incredible to see how motivated I am by the thought of getting healthy in order to have a baby.

Just wanted to say "hello" and to see if anyone else out there is over 40 and facing their first pregancy.  All words of wisdom are welcome!

Thx!

Sandra

 

stever

I'm not over 40, but there are several ladies on here who are and I'm sure they'll be a wealth of information.

Welcome and good luck!

BrideBuddies

I'm 41.. and will be 42 by the time the alien arrives.   Plus, I'm pretty heavy, too.  But I carry my weight well--to the point that the dr. was surprised at how much I weigh when she saw it.  (Boy, does that sound like I'm trying to justify it?)

Yeah, I know I need to lose weight.  But my OBGYN said not to sweat it so  much now that I'm pregnant.  Overall, I'm very healthy--nice good BP, no real family history of anything, no allergies, etc.  As long as I don't gain a ton of weight, I'll be fine.   I do try to get out and walk every day.. that's been tough considering the weather and my nausea lately.

iluvtom

I am 38 and will be 39 when I deliver, I just wanted to say welcome. Good luck and enjoy every minute of this journey. I know I am. If you need anything just post and others will respond, this boards activity varies fro mday to day!

JenniferTCU

Hi Sandra-

Welcome to our board! I just turned 40 in February and am due in September. The only nerve-racking thing about the journey for me is all of the genetic testing. Friends on this board have been so worried (I am totally in this category) until they get their results which typically turn out really well.

Good luck with your appt and your journey!

Jen

NewMrs07

Hi and welcome! I'm 38 and will be 39 when I have the baby. We want 2 kids, so I'll definitely be over 40 when I have the second one. For now I'm enjoying my first pregnancy, in case I never get to do it again. There are many ways to increase your fertility. Losing weight is def. one of them, and also eating more organic foods, exercising, drinking special teas and keeping track of your most fertile days.

Good luck and ask any questions you want!

Peppernut

Hello! ?I just delurked myself! ?I'm 41 with a 30-year old husband, and I've been pregnant a few times with less than stellar outcomes; this will hopefully be our first child. ?Nice to see you!

mominatrix

Hey!

I'm 40 and have a just-turned-2-year-old and am due to deliver our second on my 41st birthday (joy).

Also, I'm fairly overweight.

 

On the first issue: being older means there are a few more things you're prone to. Me, I had the amnio (and will again) to convince myself that those things were simply not an issue.

You'll be more tired than you would have been at 20... and more cranky.

But the payoff is that having a child at our age is great... I think the most important lesson for a parent to learn is patience - - and at 40 I'm a helluva lot more patient than I was at 20 or even 30... so go with it!!

 

On the weight issue... I, myself, and others I've known who were heavier when conceiving actually lost weight during the course of the pregnancy. My sister was heavy when she got pregnant - she developed gestational diabetes and was put on a strict diet - she weighed less when she delivered than she did when she conceived.

Myself, when I had Isabella, I lost weight through the first and second trimesters then gained in the third... when I delivered, I think I weighed a bit more than when I conceived, but not much (and Isabella was 9 lbs, 6 oz of that!)

Now, I'm feeling myself losing weight (rings getting looser, etc) - but now, I'm not only pregnant, but I'm also still breastfeeding Isabella... together the two monopolize more calories than you can imagine.

 

good luck to you!

ml0904

Hello

I am 42 and this is my first. DH is in his 50's and it is his 6th. I am overweight and my doc has never said boo about it while we were trying to conceive. She has not said boo about how much weight to gain either but at 4 months I had only gained 1 pound.

So far our pregnancy has been wonderful. I have had no morning sickness or anything, just some fatigue. All of our testing so far has shown a healthy little one in there.

 Good Luck!

 Michelle

gertyrae

HI, I was 38 when DH and I got married and we started trying almost right away. At 39, I started going to a fertility clinic and at 40, switched RE's. I got PG at 42 with our first, whom we lost at 22 weeks. Less than a year later, I was PG again....so far everything looks good, although I am on bedrest but it has nothing to do with my age.

Definitely talk to your OB - the biggest problem at our age is that our eggs are "old" and of lesser quality so it's harder to get PG.

Good luck to you!!1

robynlesley

Hi Sandra!

I'm a wee bit younger (will be 39 next Tuesday) but shared many of your concerns. I think everyone here has given you some terrific advice and I hope that you'll be "officially" joining us here soon.

Another great board to check out is TTC after 35. The ladies there are very supportive and have great advice and insight on trying to conceive. Just another spot to check out, since you're very welcome here too.

https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/4236747/ShowForum.aspx

BellyDancrBride

I can't say thank you enough to all of you who have read & responded.  My husband & I are still so excited, and we've made a pre-conception appt at my OB/GYN on Friday. 

Regarding my weight, I have had other moms tell me not to worry so much about my weight.....that getting "PG" (trying to pick up the lingo here) will be the real concern. 

I look forward to talking with you all as I journey into uncharted territory for me.  It's a comfort to know that you're out there.

-Sandra

babyc0608

I too was overweigt w/ high blood pressure when we decided to start thinking about having a family. I did weight watchers and worked out and lost 30lbs 9 months prior.  My dr. took me off BPM before getting pregnant to see how I would do and I have been fine.  I am sooo glad I did this prior because on another board that I read, there was a girl who was early 30's who was overweight and ended up getting high blood pressure during pregnancy and ended up delievering her baby at 26 weeks. They ended up enducing her because she was about to die due to preeclampsia.  Just telling you so that it is something to think about and more motivation to loose weight, not to scare you. I am still "plus" size during this pregnancy, but the 30lb loss obviously was better than nothing since bp has been a consistant 112/60 thus far. Best Wishes....