Told MIL our adoption plans

Dr.Loretta

It went well, I guess. DH told her while I was at church, so I didn't have to be there for her conspiracy theories. When I got home we discussed it for a while and I gave her a copy of Adoption for Dummies.

 Of course, I got "just adopt and you'll get pregnant". I wanted to launch myself across the table at her, but I simply said, "That only happens in 8% of adoptions, so I'm not holding my breath."

 

Mrs.R2D2

OMG, I *hate* the "just adopt and you'll get pregnant" comments. Part of me thinks that, yes, my life runs by Murphy;'s law so I probably will get pg with a sticky baby.  But what do you think, we're going to send the adopted kid back if we do?

I'm sometimes tempted to respond with, "oh, so you're saying I'll get pg and have another miscarriage? thanks for your support."

jacksjerseygirl

So two positives: the cat is out of the bag and you didn't kill anyone today

 

TTCgradstud

jacksjerseygirl:

So two positives: the cat is out of the bag and you didn't kill anyone today

::Giggle:: 

Glad to hear it went well-enough.  I am just thankful my mom went through the IF struggle with my BFF's mom a million years ago.  So she learned back then what not to day...  My MIL on the other hand has had a few shining moments of stupidity "Are you sure you aren't going to regret not being pg??"  But I will say this, she was SO excited when we were matched and wanted to buy everything she could, and got a little annoyed because I had bought most of it already, so she is forgiven.  Maybe your's will come around when there is a real baby involved not just the idea of one. 

MyColonyNJ

Glad it went OK, one less thing to stress about

Dr.Loretta

Mrs.R2D2:

I'm sometimes tempted to respond with, "oh, so you're saying I'll get pg and have another miscarriage? thanks for your support."

I SO wanted to say something like that! DH did tell her about our IF struggles and my 3 m/c's, just so he didn't hear the unsolicited advice of whatever wacky fertility treatment she's heard about (and she finds the absolute wackiest examples of just about any topic). After all that, I couldn't believe she said it to my face.

Dr.Loretta

jacksjerseygirl:

So two positives: the cat is out of the bag and you didn't kill anyone today

LOL! We tried to, actually. Took her on an outing that turned out to be much more strenuous than we imagined. I thought she was going to have a heart attack before we got back to the car.

triumphantreturnofplanningbug

I'm glad it went as well as possible, and I'm very impressed that you stayed calm and didn't kill her!

BurkeJax

Oh yay...I am glad that is over for you...If all she threw was the you will get knocked up card I count that as a success...LOL

 

lrrb

I just don't understand why so many people have an opinion about adoption.  Mine and my DH's families were SO supportive I jsut don't get it...a baby is a baby, blood or not....its still your daughter or son.  Thats so annoying...but at least you told them. Now you can enjoy being paper pregnant!

KarlsSweetie05

well, that went OK, not horrible in the grand scheme of things, thank goodness, glad that is behind you now and you can move forward.

jacksjerseygirl

lrrb:

Mine and my DH's families were SO supportive I jsut don't get it...a baby is a baby, blood or not....its still your daughter or son.  Thats so annoying...but at least you told them. Now you can enjoy being paper pregnant!

I know ... our family's just did not care one bit about our fertility/infertility and never questioned 'why'. So I guess they just don't care about their DNA/Genes as much lol

I feel like what you pass on - family values, beliefs, traditions, special moments, and so forth are far more important legacy than hair, eye, or skin color. When we all talk about our own childhoods and lives do we reminese about the brown eyes we got from our dad or about the family tradition of pancakes on sunday morning and family movie/snuggle night on Fridays .... ? I'm guessing that most of us talk more about those family moments/traditions than about the genetics we received.Shrugs ...

I feel the need to make a tee shirt ... lol

sabrina69barnes

Dr.Loretta:

 Of course, I got "just adopt and you'll get pregnant". I wanted to launch myself across the table at her, but I simply said, "That only happens in 8% of adoptions, so I'm not holding my breath."

 

 Duh, that happens all the time. That's why I have soooo many brothers and sisters. Oh wait, I just remembered that I'm an only child.

Mrs.R2D2

Dr.Loretta:

Mrs.R2D2:

I'm sometimes tempted to respond with, "oh, so you're saying I'll get pg and have another miscarriage? thanks for your support."

I SO wanted to say something like that! DH did tell her about our IF struggles and my 3 m/c's, just so he didn't hear the unsolicited advice of whatever wacky fertility treatment she's heard about (and she finds the absolute wackiest examples of just about any topic). After all that, I couldn't believe she said it to my face.

Whoa... that is beyond the pale.  I am sorry for your loss.

BB&J

At least it's over and doesn't sound like it was too bad. I wanted to kill my MIL for the Now You'll Get Pregnant statement. In my case, a pregnancy would mean no chance for a baby to survive and little chance for me to survive, so the comment really struck a nerve for me. Hmmm...looking back, she never really stopped saying it until we got our daughter.

Oh, yeah, that and the Psychic said (according to my MIL) that our daughter would teach us many things. Yeah, takes a genius and someone who can peer ino the future to figure out that we learn from our kids.

BB&J

 

 

Dr.Loretta

BB&J:

Oh, yeah, that and the Psychic said (according to my MIL) that our daughter would teach us many things. Yeah, takes a genius and someone who can peer ino the future to figure out that we learn from our kids.

BB&J

OMG, your MIL has a psychic too? MIL called the day of my ectopic pg in 2007 to tell me the psychic predicted a good year for me. Called last year right before the economic collapse to tell me he predicted a good financial year. Told me last Easter he predicted she'd be a grandmother within a year. And now he predicts we'll have 2 children.