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InACitySoNice
member
Second-Time Moms -- What Did You Do With DC ...
InACitySoNice
member
What did you do with your DC #1 when you went into labor/went into the hospital to give birth to DC #2?
I'm really up a tree. She's supposed to go to a friend's house who has 2 DCs, but she hasn't seen them since October or so. We were supposed to go there for dinner on Monday, but things aren't lining up as I'd planned. I'm reluctant to send her to someone's house without me, especially since she hasn't seen them in ages. I'm afraid she'd be traumatized. Maybe I'm just projecting.
Would I regret it for the rest of my life if I just had DH watch DD while I'm in the hospital/labor and go it alone? (He's pretty useless in L&D anyway).
Those are my only options. So tell me your stories!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Second-Time Moms -- What Did You Do With DC ...
i can not imagine going through labor without my DH.
i would start taking your DS to this house at least once/week and get her used to them.
my DS will be with my sister/mother, thankfully they live close.
All of my family is out of state, and all of DH's family are insane and I don't trust them with DD. So that's out.
My friend lives out in Brooklyn, which is an hour away, making it a two-hour trip any time we want to go out there, so unfortunately I can't just pop in and out whenever I want.
Other than that, there's really no one that we see. Most of my friends have kids in college or they just don't know DD well enough for me to trust leaving her with them. We have never used babysitters or anything, so that's out, too. I'm totally stressing about this, as you can tell.
This is a really difficult situation. I'm not in your situation but I have helped out friends having a second (or in one case, their 5th) child.
I understand that the 2 hour trip to Brooklyn to see your friends there is really hard, but it seems like your best option at this point. Think of it, perhaps, as insurance for peace of mind when you go in to have DD#2.
Are any of your relatives in the position to fly in to watch DD#1? That can get tricky with the timing of it and all. . . from your stories, I would not leave your precious DD with your ILs. That scares me and I've never met them!
As a last resort, have you called any nanny services? You can't be the first person in NYC to deal with this. Perhaps they have on-call services. Sure, it might be someone your DD doesn't know well, but, she would be a professional.
I hope that something comes together so that your DH is with you for the birth of your second child and so that you don't worry about your daughter during L&D. Keep us posted!
where do you live? I feel bad - i'm in NJ - bring her here
2 hours is far - if you are in labor you can't make that trip.... maybe look into sitters - like "In a Pinch" service- at least for the day you deliver? or an in-home daycare providor that you could work out a deal with to bring her a few times before you deliver. I know there are many in our town and i'm sure one would do overnight if needed for a delivery.
Would it be possible, instead of sending her to yoru friend's house in Brooklyn, to have that friend come stay at your house? I know it would probably feel awkward to ask that of the friend, but it would probably be more comfortable for your DD to be at home even if she's not all that familiar with your friend. Maybe you could offer your friend some incentive her her time/travel like a gift card or something? If your home is close to the hospital, my DH could even run back and forth in your early labor to check on DD or your friend could bring her to the hospital so she'd be close once the baby arrived.
Good luck!