what to expect

itsmyangel

we havn't even filled out an applicaiton yet...but i'm already thinking ahead.  what types of things to expect in your home studies?  Do they want you to have a nursery already sort of set up?  When making your books for the birth mothers.....do you have pics of nursery in there or are you waiting to set that room up until you have a placement?  I guess I am a bit ahead of myself....but thats how i usually am...so full of questions!

so1966

i'm in the beginning stage, also.  i do know that the homestudy social worker will make sure your house is safe for children and have you make some changes in your home.  i imagine they will ask you lots of question about your entire life and your family and also about your financial situation.  i'm sure your agency will walk you through the whole process and answer your questions about your interaction with birthmother.

i hope you have lots of replies, as i'm curious, too.

GL to you!...

itsmyangel

Thanks and you as well

BurkeJax

Personally we are not doing an nursery until we have placement. We will get a Pack N Play and wing it when we get a call...I am open minded to changing this, but personally I am not too fond of an empty Nursery.

 

jacksjerseygirl

itsmyangel:

we havn't even filled out an applicaiton yet...but i'm already thinking ahead.  what types of things to expect in your home studies?  Do they want you to have a nursery already sort of set up?  When making your books for the birth mothers.....do you have pics of nursery in there or are you waiting to set that room up until you have a placement?  I guess I am a bit ahead of myself....but thats how i usually am...so full of questions!

Generally there are a few meetings with your SW - a couple meeting, individual meetings, and a review of your home. A multitude of questions are asked, physicals, financials, etc.Questions about your childhood, discipline, infertility, why you are adopting, how you met, your relationship, and so forth. The review of the home varies greatly by state and even by SW - state adoptions tend to be more indepth about what is required than private adoptions. We expect to start our homestudy in the next couple of weeks, should take about 6 weeks to complete. I think that generally they try to get all of the meetings done over a few weeks and then they spend the final few weeks putting everything together. Also during this time a criminal background check with the state and fbi will be completed, and a child abuse check.

Having the nursery set up is a personal preference. Many people don't like to do it - especially if having suffered through IF, miscarriages, etc but many people do like to do it because it is a sign of the future. We are decorating our nursery (gender neutral) - we are treating this time before adoption 'as if' we were expecting the old fashioned way - we didn't want to miss out on the exciting and fun time of decorating a nursery and buying baby stuff in anticipation of our little one.

We do plan to have pictures of our nursery available to the BM - we have heard from BM that it is comforting for them to have more insight into where their baby's head will lay at night.

 

speak-ez

It can really depend on your agency and state. We applied in Aug., officially started home study with our profile in Sept (took over a month) and right now are waiting for our homestudy to be written and approved. As pp said it includes background checks, physicals, financial statement, fire inspection, personal questions, couple visits with sw. Our agency required 12 hours of education which they provided. We also had to do a child care class and child/infant cpr.

We have not started a nursery and our agency encourages waiting to do that. Another local agency requires pics of finished nursery in the profile so that can really depend. We'll probably start getting the car seat and other necessities after we're approved. GL with everything! It"s exciting to get started!

PSU-NCBride

We started our nursery right before we started our home study. For us, we are planners and it gave us something to focus on. Our consultant loved our nursery and was excited to have us put photos in our profile. Now that we are 'waiting' we gradually buy things here and there. The one thing that everyone seemed to insist we buy was the carseat. If we get a call for a BOG, they wanted to make sure we had that ready to go so we could get the baby from the hospital.?

I think it is a personal decision on how much to do. We are gender neutral people anyway, so it wasn't a big deal. We were more scared to get the call and freak out that we didn't have stuff, than worried about the empty nursery. I actually enjoy hanging out in the nursery sometimes and getting used to. The dogs are gradually getting used to all the new smells and items, as well. ?

jacksjerseygirl

PSU-NCBride:

 

 The dogs are gradually getting used to all the new smells and items, as well.  

That's our other reason for doing the nursery ahead of time, pets are very quirky and if they associate a 'bunch' of changes with the baby then they might associate 'bad' with the baby and act out. So we are trying to get my 13 year old king of the castle used to baby stuff and the nursery.

itsmyangel

That is a very very good point.  I'm worried about our dogs ...well one in particular...becuase she's very territorial and barks qiute a bit at people she doesn't know....so i'm very worried about how that will impact our homestudy