Momma's Boy

Kian'sMommy

Kian is really clingy with me.  He wants to be picked up and held a lot and I'm the only one he'll go to most of the time (not even DH).  I'm really struggling with it.  From the me perspective of course there are the times that I'd like to not be carrying around an extra 26 pounds but I can deal with that.  What I really worry about is that the clinginess and focus on me makes things even harder for him. 

We have a really difficult time with daycare drop off.  We did recently switch daycares but this started before the switch and isn't improving after the switch.  I'm working from home today and mistakenly went out to the livingroom where he and DH are and had to leave 30min later with DH prying him off of me and both Kian and I in tears.  I worry that he clings so much because I'm not around enough.  I have a semi-demanding work schedule and a 3 hour daily commute.  I've cut back on work as much as I can but I feel guilty every day for the time I'm away from him.  I miss him so much and he's almost 20 mo.  I've given up hope that being a workign mom is going to get easier.  I wonder if not picking him up as much would help since no one else is willing or able to carry him around constantly but then I tell him "Mommy can't hold you, I can hug you or I can hold you hand" and he just disolves in tears again.  Any tips for helping he and I get through this?

IMFun

awhhh... I have many of the same problems, but I know that surprises you! 

I think a good portion of this is the age... I have been told that at this age it's common for them to have a hard time with us leaving them at daycare.  Joey cries every single day that I leave.  And especially in the morning, Joey is even more clingy to me.  He won't even go to DH and it's hard on me. 

lately... he has been having his moments where he only wants DH (usually afternoons).  But i have worked at leaving them together as much as I *can* and even a weekend here and there.  

I wish I had advice... and maybe the other moms can help...  I could use it too. 

 

horn_jm@hotmail.com

I wish I had good advice, but I think they all go through different phases and levels of separation anxiety over time. ?They'll get over it for awhile, and then a new wave hits. ?And my DS seems to now have mommy phases and daddy phases ... which is sweet yet exhausting during whoever's turn it is. ?It may just be something that passes. ?It may be hard or confusing for him if he has to say goodbye to you multiple times rather than once (if you visit him and DH and then go back to what you are doing). ?I know my DS has a harder time leaving DH alone on the rare days DH works from home. ?Good luck!

JamicanBride

Kian'sMommy:

Kian is really clingy with me.  He wants to be picked up and held a lot and I'm the only one he'll go to most of the time (not even DH).  I'm really struggling with it.  From the me perspective of course there are the times that I'd like to not be carrying around an extra 26 pounds but I can deal with that.  What I really worry about is that the clinginess and focus on me makes things even harder for him. 

We have a really difficult time with daycare drop off.  We did recently switch daycares but this started before the switch and isn't improving after the switch.  I'm working from home today and mistakenly went out to the livingroom where he and DH are and had to leave 30min later with DH prying him off of me and both Kian and I in tears.  I worry that he clings so much because I'm not around enough.  I have a semi-demanding work schedule and a 3 hour daily commute.  I've cut back on work as much as I can but I feel guilty every day for the time I'm away from him.  I miss him so much and he's almost 20 mo.  I've given up hope that being a workign mom is going to get easier.  I wonder if not picking him up as much would help since no one else is willing or able to carry him around constantly but then I tell him "Mommy can't hold you, I can hug you or I can hold you hand" and he just disolves in tears again.  Any tips for helping he and I get through this?

I have the same issue but I worry that he's so clingy because I'm around too much.  Even at playdates it take a good 20 minutes before he'll get off me and actually go play.  He's great one on one, but I think he's a lot like me and gets intimated by large groups. I truly hope it's a phase and especially since it's just recently started (although he's always been somewhat clingy) and he's known all those people most of his life.  I've seen other kids who were even more clingy to their Mom's finally are able to let go a bit and interact with the other kids, thoes kids are now about 2 1/2.  I also feel even worse since he's a boy and in my mind I expect boys to be more social.