feel like a bad wife :(

goldenmama

DH and I have always been not only a great married couple but also the best of friends. We both have our on interests and encourage each other to pursue them plus we always used to go on adventures together. I am just feeling really hormonal today and just feel like I have let my best friend down because I am always " to tired, to cranky or just not in the mood" to do anything from our former life.

I think I need to jump start my former life at least a little. I have two friends that keep offering to babysit and I think I am going to have them come at the same time so they are not overwhelmed and plan a date day because a date evening is still just to late for us

linda98ny

I'm guessing MANY women on this board can relate. ?It's very hard to have all the energy for everything you did before having twins especially if they're still not sleeping through the night. ?I do know as they get older and play together more and sleep better that you'll have more energy for things again. ?It's not easy to be all things to all people. ?Don't be so hard on yourself!

TazDev

That sounds like a GREAT idea And do not be too down on yourself - things have been hard for the past 7mo.  You will get back in the swing of some things.  I think that is the best idea to have a date day!  Sounds awesome!

barker2B

I could have written your post myself...one of our new years resolutions was to figure out how to get some normalcy back in our lives--I recently posted that we just finally got a babysitter for the first time so that we can go to a wedding in a few weeks--one step at a time, right? Good luck!! If you discover any great tips, please share:)

luvmagoldn

Yeah, I am right there with you.  I knew it was bad when my parents came to visit last fall.  They told us ahead of time that they wanted to take DH and me to dinner - just adults.  My dad said that we provide a lot of activities and outings for the boys but he doesn't hear us talking about doing things for ourselves.  So, we got a sitter and had a nice leisurely dinner with my folks at a place that actually serves meals on nice plates and has wine glasses! 

Finding a new normal is the trick which I haven't quite figured out yet.  But, getting a sitter and going out together is a good first step.  Even if it's for a couple of hours in the middle of the day!  And I agree about having two people there with the kids. When my boys were small the teenage girl next door and her teenaged cousin would both come to babysit together.  Now that they are older and more mobile one person can handle them.

krisc

I think most of us can relate, it's hard enough to find time for ourselves, let alone for our spouses or marriages.  I think we are just starting to get back to the way we were...but still not 100% there.  We actually got out for the first time to dinner and a movie the other weekend because my mom came to watch the boys.  It was really nice to be together, have a glass of wine and just sit and talk.  I miss those times with my husband. 

I agree with pps, it's all about finding a "new normal" which probably will come eventually.  Hang in there, I'm sure he's feeling the same way about being there for you too.