Anatomy Scan (20 weeks)

knottiee3a565ac10d4d5f7

Hello everyone.
We had the 20 week scan today. It's amazing how much they can see at this stage. Thankfully they said everything is on point and going well. Baby Inca wasnt overly concerned...it was laying back sucking its thumb the whole time lol

Sending good vibes to all of you going for your 20 week scan soon.

Sam and Yesi (and baby 'Inca')

fern_and_feather

Hooray for Inca doing well!

I just had an anatomy scan today and all was well!

I would've typically opted out of the anatomy scan, but my firstborn has a congenital deformity, and I felt bound / justly obligated to get things checked out, just in case there was something we should know ahead of time for their safety. I ended up being much more anxious and scared than I expected, and it was a huge relief to hear that everything I was worried about didn't come to pass!

knottiee3a565ac10d4d5f7

It's a wild swing of emotions. Apprehensive and scared, trying to second guess what the technician is thinking as they do their thing, and then the moment of truth when the doctor comes in.

Yesterday, which was 23weeks and 3days we had to call the OBGYN because of discomfort and hardening of the bump. Turns out it was Braxton Hicks and the doctor said not to worry about them.

As we edge slowly towards 24weeks (age of viability) we both find ourselves being more and more nervous/afraid. There seems to be less activity in this group since the initial happiness has passed. We are very much on our own (we are both immigrants in NY City and our families are thousands of miles away. I'm Irish and my wife is Peruvian. And most worrying of all...I'm 50 and my wife is 49. It's our one and only chance to be parents (we met in our early 40s). We tried for a couple of years, then a couple of years with treatment. Then a couple of years where the pandemic stopped things (we did ivf overseas). On top of that we are in a small 1 bed apt in Queens nd trying to declutter, paint, clean and do improvements ahead of selling our apt. We are in need of moving because we need more space but also because we need to release equity. Combination of ivf and the pandemic has hit our savings hard. It's all a bit overwhelming. Sorry for venting out of context

fern_and_feather

@knottiee3a565ac10d4d5f7 Oh goodness, that sounds like so much, almost too much. Your heart and your wife's heart... I'm so sorry for how much worry and fear you're both holding. And to not have family nearby. Are there any in-person prenatal groups that you could attend? Or are y'all part of any community / church / hobby groups? Even colleagues from work may be interested in helping if each of you ask for support. You will need help, and I'm just trying to think of ways to build up your network. (Very much unsolicited advice, but I wish I could help.)

knottiee3a565ac10d4d5f7

Thank you!
Believe me unsolicited is totally fine!
I think we are both a little self conscious about joining a group because of our age. That's probably silly but it's a thing. The churches here are plentiful and crowded...but due to the sheer volume of people there is less community support or friendship than in smaller towns or cities.

I have a cousin in NY and we are close, but (ironically) she is a L&D nurse, and because she is heading for retirement she supplemented her part time 2 nights a week job with back to back to back travel nurse assignments meaning she is working 60hrs a week at nights.

I really appreciated the opportunity to vent earlier, and your reply. I felt so bad earlier I went out for a drive. And when I got back my wife told me Baby Inca kicked for the first time. Then again. Then regularly for an hour. She felt it and saw it. When i got back i felt it. 23w and 5days. A better end to the day I guess that about sums up pregnancy...a rollercoaster ride of emotions