PGAL check in week of 1/19

tumbleweed-1

This thread is for those who are pregnant after a previous loss(es). TW for entire thread due to discussion of MC, TFMR, CP, etc. 

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Weeks/EDD?

How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically?

Any appointment updates?

Any big milestones?

Rants/Raves/Questions? 

msjaay

Weeks/EDD? 12w1d 8/2

How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically? I feel great physically, but that has caused me not to feel great emotionally.

Any appointment updates? I was kind of a wreck before my appt on Monday and my H wasn't able to be in the appt with me. I pretty much unloaded all of this on my doctor and she did an u/s to ease my mind and to share pictures with my H. She reiterated baby is measuring great and we're seeing a really strong heartbeat. She was essentially like, I can't make promises, but your rate of m/c is very, very low at this point.

Any big milestones? I think just hitting 12 weeks and having two good u/s with a heartbeat have calmed my fears. I think I was very similar with my daughter. My worry goes way down w/ overall health once I get through the anatomy scan and then when I can feel the baby move.

Rants/Raves/Questions? Not right now.

ccmrc143

Weeks/EDD? 10w3d

How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically? Physically I feel good today which is weird since my sleep has been so terrible. Im trying to tell myself it’s ok to feel ok at this stage but I won’t feel confident until my appointment on Friday. 

Any appointment updates? MFM on Friday — excited to make my case for Lovenox and hopefully start the drugs. 

Any big milestones? My loss was a CP so I hit my milestone a long time ago 

Rants/Raves/Questions? I have to tell my friend who had a MC that I’m pregnant. Im starting to show and will be seeing her and I’ve been holding off. We were miscarrying at the same time although I’d argue hers was worse. Anyway we had told each other we’d share any pregnancy news but I just haven’t because I figured I would make her sad. Now that I’m this far along I have to bite the bullet and send her a text. I feel so terrible about it because I have a son and her loss was her first pregnancy. It feels unfair that I should be pregnant. I guess my hope is she replies and says she’s also pregnant! Because it’s going to be a tough few months if she’s not. 

A rave as well on a similar note: my other friend just found out she’s due in early September! I’m so so so excited because she can be my pregnancy buddy. Our firsts are a couple months apart and now we’ll have babies at the same time. 

emeraldcity603

Weeks/EDD? 8+5/ Aug 26th 

How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically? It really depends on the day. Symptoms are all over the place. What is consistent is my anxiety and crying over everything. 

Any appointment updates? I go at the end of the month. I’m trying to not request another ultrasound. I need to call my insurance and see if they cover the nuchal fold scan and if they do just wait and get the hematoma checked then. I want to know when it’s healed because I hate feeling scared to go hiking with our group. I’m missing out on some cool stuff. They are hiking to a glacier today. 

Any big milestones? My milestone for weeks is 14 but honestly I’m waiting for this hematoma to heal. Once it heals I can breathe a sigh of relief. The fact that it’s nowhere near the placenta is very reassuring to me. 

Rants/Raves/Questions?  Just the same stuff I talked about in the old thread. I’m an idiot and have been trying to find the HB on the doppler. Finally found it again today but I’m not going to check again for awhile. The anxiety it causes isn’t good for the baby nor my mental health. 

emeraldcity603

@msjaay I hate the way I feel before appointments. The amount of fear I feel is very overwhelming. It’s so unfair that we have had the joy we should be feeling ripped from us. I’m glad baby is looking great and you heard a strong HB. 

@ccmrc143 I’m sorry you’re stressing over sharing your news with your friend. As for your other friend, that will be exciting to go through this together. I have a friend who had her baby shortly after my last baby and it was nice having a friend in the same stage as me. 

lily.hazel

Weeks/EDD? 8+1

How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically?
Killer headache today, but otherwise physically okay. Mentally, the anxiety and second guessing is starting. My spotting seems to have permanently stopped since I got my ultrasound last week, so that’s good, but now I’m worried about having another mmc.

Any appointment updates?
First OB appointment is on 1/24. I’m probably going to ask for some kind of reassurance, because I can’t take not knowing.

Any big milestones? 

This baby is bigger/more developed than my twins were when I lost them this summer, even though I lost them at nine weeks (they were slow developing and were measuring 6/7 weeks). They would have been due in February, so that’s going to be a hard month for me. My second milestone will be after 16 weeks. Really hoping we make it to the anatomy scan.

Rants/Raves/Questions? Considering getting a Doppler like @emeraldcity603 but I’d probably stress myself out. Opinions on home dopplers?

troystory17

Weeks/EDD? 10w3d

How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically? We weren't planning this baby, and after how hard my last pregnancy was emotionally (he was my rainbow baby) I really didn't think I could ever do this again. So I think i'm still just in disbelief.

Any appointment updates? my first appointment is on 1/25

Any big milestones? still got along way to go.

Rants/Raves/Questions? I'm full of rants lately lol. We just moved 700 miles from home, and I really hate that my OB isnt going to deliver this baby. Just trying to find a provider down here was enough to make me want to turn right around.

emeraldcity603

@lily.hazel A doppler is great when you can find the HB. Gives reassurance because you can hear that they are still doing fine. BUT, when you can’t find it after finding it, it’s nerve wracking and anxiety inducing. It’s a catch-22. 

emeraldcity603

@troystory17 I moved across the country in the middle of one of my pregnancies and I struggled to find a provider. One I met with really upset me. He was asking me about my dates and I told him I chart my cycles and know within a few days of when ovulation occurred. He had the audacity to laugh at me. Then in one sentence he said he was low intervention but would want to induce me because of how fast my last labor had gone. I walked out of there so angry I was crying. 

troystory17

"low intervention" other than choosing when you go into labor.  I know 10-12 weeks is normal for a first visit, but I'm high risk and I'm used to being seen before now.  One of the places I called couldn't see me until mid-February so I asked if there was anyway I could be seen a little sooner because I'm 'high risk" she said no that's the soonest, and you can't deem yourself high risk. I was SO mad its my 5th pregnancy so yeah I think I can.

emeraldcity603

@troystory17 I have never had a provider not see me or at least give me an early scan due to my history. That’s just so bizarre to me. 

troystory17

@emeraldcity603 yeah I thought it was really weird that they just scheduled me without asking any of my history.  I feel like I have so much to unpack once I finally get there.

slothstatus

*PGAL brain rant*

Hi ladies, I’m feeling so hopeless. I’m nine weeks with no clue when I will see a doctor, my insurance was finally approved but all clinics around me have long waits. I do have an ultrasound (my first with this pregnancy) next week at my ten week mark with a free pregnancy clinic but I’m just so anxious and hopeless not excited at all. I have no symptoms either, no nausea, nor fatigue etc, so I’m afraid I’m having a MMC again, also my previous loss baby died at 9 weeks so that is also contributing to the anxiety. 

I also started cramping from just taking a very light 20 min walk, I had to lay down with a heating pad after so that concerned me. 

Anyways, prayers appreciated thanks for listening 🤍

troystory17

@slothstatus Prayers to you I hope the time until your ultrasound goes by quickly. 

emeraldcity603

@slothstatus I’m so sorry you’re having cramping and anxiety about a loss. I’m glad you have an upcoming ultrasound. Hopefully everything will be ok and you can relax. 

slothstatus

Update* 
I went to those cute ultrasound places that you go to for gender reveals because I couldn’t wait any longer and baby has a heartbeat 🙏🏻🎉, thank God. Finally some relief. But my anxiety won’t disappear until he/she is born full term & healthy. 

Really praying for us all to have our rainbow baby come August 🤍

emeraldcity603

Well, my bleed has gotten bigger but they said it’s not actively bleeding and it’s all old blood. How does that work? I’m so confused. Unless maybe it bled after one of my last ultrasounds and then stopped. I guess I’m not taking it easy enough. I need to spend more time laying down. It’s just hard with 5 kids on the run so much. Plus my toddler really loves being held. He is such a snuggly thing. Ugh, I’m just frustrated about the fact my bleed hasn’t shrank any. 

troystory17

I'm sorry it hasn't gotten any smaller taking it easy with 5 kiddos sounds like a pipe dream.  Fingers crossed for it to resolve quickly. 

gingermama29

I’ve been very bloaty and crampy today but it isn’t like menstrual cramps. I know it’s perfectly normal but my brain cannot stop with the what ifs. Ugh PGAL brain is the worst.

emeraldcity603

@gingermama29 I feel like that sometimes too and it always makes me feel uneasy. I was told I may have cramping when my hematoma gets absorbed. 🙄 we are all getting super close to the second trimester and we can hopefully start relaxing. 

cherrystorming

I realized today just how anxious I am. Not being on my normal meds is definitely a factor, but it’s so hard. One of my labs came back weird… I’d never seen it before like that on any of my labor patients so it freaked me out. I spent way too much time reading medical journals at 1 am and had myself convinced I was going to lose this baby. 

Turns out our health systems app just sucks and didn’t show me the full lab result - hard to explain but it is abnormal, but thankfully not one of the fatal abnormalities it could have been. 

Very thankful for my doctor who is so chill and talked me off the ledge today. I picked him for that reason (perk of working with them all, you really get to know them). I finally feel at peace today. I think I’ve been waiting for the other shoe to drop this whole pregnancy because of how many complications we went through on our 2 year infertility journey, and then a prior MC.  

Hoping this feeling of calmness lasts. 

emeraldcity603

@cherrystorming I’m sorry you went through so much turmoil. I’m glad it’s nothing major and you’re able to relax now. The NIPT is the next thing I’m doing and I’m praying my results are all normal. 

benten24

Weeks/EDD? 9+1 EDD 9/1

How are you feeling? Emotionally & physically?

I’m feeling the best I have in weeks thus far. I hope my nausea is on the decline for good and the exhaustion is over. Emotionally, I’m now also terrified of another MC since symptoms are decreasing. I’m further along than I was with my MC and I’ve seen the heartbeat on US, but PGAL brain is real. 

Any appointment updates?
Zero. It’s really bothering me that I won’t be seen for the first time until I’m 12 weeks. 

Any big milestones? 

Hired a doula! I’m hopeful it’ll help me meet my VBAC goals and offer more support than I had with DS. 

Rants/Raves/Questions? 

I’m freaking out this week because a family member shared they’re a carrier for Fragile X. With me not having an appointment for almost another month and being at the second trimester mark by that time I’m worried. I want testing asap but idk if the OB office will agree. I left a message with them this week and haven’t heard back yet. 

emeraldcity603

@benten24 I’m getting my genetic testing done this coming Monday and I will be 10 weeks. I would call and ask if you could just come in for labs. I’m sure they will be ok with that. 

ccmrc143

I’m so jealous it can happen so early for you @emeraldcity603 - I’ll be 12.5 weeks by the time my blood is drawn and the scan happens for NIPT on Friday. 

@benten24 I agree they’ll almost certainly call you back for a blood draw on Monday, or at least when you’re 10w. And that’s awesome about the doula. I had a doula with DS and she was worth it. She helped me decide when to “give in” and go with the epidural and she helped me so much when back labor started and I felt like I was going to have a BM — things Im grateful DH didn’t fully witness alone. She sent him off to do various things when I needed space and also helped him support me when I did want him there. 

benten24

I called again about the genetic testing yesterday (Tuesday) because I still hadn’t heard anything. The nurse I spoke to does GYN and not OB so she was lost about what to order. I’m still waiting on a call back from the OB office to actually schedule anything. 

@ccmrc143 oh that’s wonderful to hear, thanks for sharing! That is exactly what I’m hoping for with my doula. Are you planning to use her again for this birth?