Grandparents separate rooms for Christmas

sunshine435

So I have three children my husband adopted which are 4th-12th grade age and we also have a baby. He has a brother who long story short isn’t very involved with his kids but his mother does all of his parenting time for him, communication with their moms and cares for the kids. To the point we don’t have much opportunity to spend time with her bc she is so busy with them. On Christmas after we all open presents they have us stay in a different room and they all go do Christmas Morning with the brother and his kids. We don’t feel like this is appropriate and creates an uncomfortable dynamic for our kids. The response we got was that our kids were old enough it shouldn’t matter, it’s not about the gifts, and they go in the other room. It’s not a big house and not behind closed doors. We just sit there awkwardly listening and waiting until we can move around. The brother doesn’t even live there so we don’t understand why this has to happen this way. No one comes to our home for Christmas morning. The whole family just seems to revolve around his brother and his kids. We don’t care about gifts but it has created some hurtful feelings for the kids and all they really say is well they’re biologically related so we understand, while I get it won’t be 100% the same (the in laws claim it is) I just feel like this is so thoughtless. My husband is kind of feeling like just not being involved at all anymore with them. Are we being overly sensitive? Would anyone else have an issue with this?