D&E 15w4d :(

aandkrivera

Hi everyone. Unfortunately, my husband and I lost our very first pregnancy on Friday at almost 16 weeks. We’d already announced it, found out baby boy’s gender, and started buying him things. We waited until 13 weeks to announce, to be safe. All of my genetic testing was low risk. We are at such a loss. The doctor was able to send some of baby boy’s tissue out for testing, so we may be able to get answers. But I can’t even imagine what the answers will be. Is it possible for this to just *happen* for no real reason this late in the pregnancy? It’s been so hard physically, mentally, and emotionally. I can’t imagine the anxiety I’ll feel when I’m ready to try to conceive again. Can anyone who has been through a late loss like this offer me any advice? 💙

acamomma18

Sending so much love, mama! I lost my baby girl at 12 weeks after similar news (heart beat, clean genetic testing, etc). It seems these things randomly happen sometimes, but that doesn’t make it easier. We also have to be okay with not knowing “why” (pathology picked up nothing of interest for us). The big thing: YOU DID NOTHING WRONG. It is not your fault. I’ll repeat: it is not your fault. Reaching out to others who have traveled this shitty path before has helped me cope 💕 and time… that has helped as well. Sending so much loving energy your way!

ravenhairedgirl83

@aandkrivera
I am so, so sorry. I nearly cried when I read your post earlier and I wanted to come back and post. Yes, I was lurking and saw your post. Sometimes very sh*tty things happen to good people who have done absolutely nothing wrong for absolutely no good reason. I hope the tissue test from your son gives you some helpful answers for the future. Take your time, feel sad, anxious, all the feelings you'll need to work through. Don't apologize for anything. Please know that a stranger in New Hampshire is grieving for you and wishes you the absolute best if - or when - you and your husband try to conceive again.