Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

Mad

I had a miscarriage 2 months ago. I thought I would be able to start trying again right away but it has taken 2 months for my cycle to return to normal and I feel so physically and emotionally exhausted from it all that I don’t think I’m ready.  Every time I see someone pregnant I feel angry, feel like I want to be pregnant, and also confused/mad that I don’t want to start trying again yet.  Has anyone sorted through similar emotions, I would love any words of wisdom. 

Re: Mad

  • Yes- not alone. I was very angry- could hardly look at a pregnant person. Cliche- but it took time. It took me a year and even some counseling to work through the emotions - you are grieving - anger is one the emotions that is part of that. Give yourself some grace. Find sone things that bring joy and hope- I journaled a lot and gardened. Bought a plant as a memorial for my baby that I can take care of and remember her by. So sorry.
  • Yes!  I still get very angry over my situation at times.  What helped me back in my earlier, less MCs days was realizing that I don't know the background of all those PG people I see.  Some of them may have had 3 or 4 or more MCs before they got PG with the child I currently see them carrying.  Maybe they had years of infertility before they got PG.  That helped me to cope.  That they may be super happy because they were just as desperate as me for that living baby...

    But also, yes... therapy!  Lots of therapy.
    *TW All the Loss* #BitterHagPartyOf1

    October 2015 - 1st MC.  7-8 weeks along. Suspected molar PG, but luckily just a MMC.

    June 2016 - 2nd MC: 4-5 weeks CP

    September 2016 - 3rd MC: 4-5 weeks CP

    RE 1: ALL the testing - 'unexplained'  "Yinz can do IVF or try on your own"

    Feb 2017 - 4th MC: 6 weeks

    RE 2: More tests. Still 'unexplained.'  Called fat for an entire hour-long appointment, cried a lot

    Feb 2019 - 5th MC: 6-7 weeks

    IUD - March 2019-March 2023

    RE 3:  Repeat all the tests. Hoping to try IVF.

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