Pregnancy symptoms and work

jaykayel23

Hi mamas. I’m at 6 weeks right now and the last 3 or 4 days have been rough. It’s 3am right now and I’m laying in bed already feeling queasy and dreading having to go in the office in the morning. I threw up 4 times yesterday. I’m the People Experience Manager for my company and expected to be encouraging everyone else to be going back into the office, but it feels crazy at this point to try to be there a often as they want me to be. I did disclose to my manager on Friday because I knew I couldn’t hide it from him. But this did not sway him in letting me work from home next week. While most of my job is admin related, I also manage office operations and I’ve been supervising our renovation, which has elements of physical labor, and the couple of days I was in last will completely drained me.

I think I’m looking for some advice or validation from anyone else in an office related job struggling or has struggled. Would it help my case to get a doctor’s note? How do I have a conversation with my male, gay Manager who’s already squeamish about pregnancy talk? I love him so much but I don’t quite think he’s fully grasping the severity of my struggle and it’s making me feel crazy. And I really don’t want anyone else in my company to know yet until 10 weeks which is a month away. Everyone else has the option to work remotely but because of my role I’m expected to be a positive influence in this whole return to office thing and it feels so unfair. Ugh.

leahandbabyr

Ugh. I can totally relate. I’m going back into the office tomorrow for the first time and I really don’t know how I’m going to hide this - I am definitely not myself. I think you need to have a frank conversation with you manager and be clear about what you can/can’t do. If you’re not met with compassion and understanding then it may be worth speaking to your doctor. I think it’s more likely that you will get what you want, but sometimes we need to spell it out for people. Try to determine what is going to make this work for you, and ask for it. It sounds like your manager just might not know how to deal with the situation. Not ideal, but you’re in charge this time!

mhdmass3232

Depending on the state you live in there may be laws that require workplace accommodations like limiting physical labor.

I recently had to tell my manager I was pregnant earlier than planned because my first trimester symptoms were limiting what I could do. I really just had to decide what it was possible for me to do and what I couldn’t do in order to do what was best for my health and put my foot down. Hopefully your manager will be understanding and accommodating once you explain more, but if not make sure you advocate for yourself!

jaykayel23

Yeah he’s definitely being weird about this whole thing. He’s usually really supportive and understanding. I ended up going into the office to do my work, but I got so fatigued I threw up twice. I told him point blank and he carried on the conversation like nothing. I ended up putting my foot down and just leaving. But I think we need to have a more straightforward conversation. Thanks for taking the time to respond!