WTF Wednesday 1/19

inthewoods23

Anything got you going "wtf???" lately? Vent away here!

sunshineandlemons

No wtf at the moment, but just came here to say that this is hands down my favorite gif. 🤣 

My husband and I actually came across the music video this was from a few years ago. It’s when blink-182 did a cover of bird is the word!

LJMoon6

Heartburn in the middle of the day from drinking water…

I remember the heartburn being really bad with my first but I think it’s too early to be this bad already!

inthewoods23

@sunshineandlemons they did a cover of bird is the word? I never knew that. I'm pretty sure this gif is from their First Date music video but man has it been a long time since I've seen their music videos.


I don't have a wtf other than wtf with my stomach throwing a fit this morning making me feel like garbage. I hate feeling sick out of the blue like this.

runnergirl2018

@inthewoods23 the stomach thing is making me feel better - I am still having random heart palpitations - think from recovering from the stomach bug but ihad some random nausea last night and this morning and was pretty sure it meant i was dying but its probably a combination of recovery and pregnancy 


Mine - childcare for 2 kids...ugh $$$$. ..and the inequity of family help for us compared to others with kids in the family

tuxielove93

My WTF goes to my husband's leave policy. We finally got the "official" leave policy and it's just so badly written. I'm really grateful he has it but holy f. They want a month's notice of the exact day he's leaving. But he isn't leaving until I'm in labor. Which possibly means his leave won't even kick in until the next day after? And the pay is 66% which fine but... can we really not have made that an easier number? He can use PTO to get to full pay but I can't even begin to calculate from 66%. Unfortunately, there isn't a way to take a shorter leave at 100% pay either. He only wants like 2 weeks, and they give him 12. Which is really generous and awesome, but also sucks that he can't take a shorter leave at full pay. 

They just made it really unnecessarily complicated. It seems like whoever wrote it has never had kids.

ETA: @inthewoods23 If it makes you feel better, at nearly 16 weeks here I have suddenly had first trimester worthy nausea again. I am not happy. It was almost better and then idk... last week it just started up again.  

inthewoods23

@tuxielove93 I'm feeling better but jesus am I TIRED. I could easily go take a 2 hour nap right now.

I can't wait to hear what my leave policy is. I've heard that some places require you to use your PTO first before FMLA can kick in and I'm like WTF why?!?! At my company we accrue our PTO so I have like 4 weeks banked right now since we obviously didn't go anywhere in 2020, did a week long vacation last year, plus 2 days off around the holidays at the end of the year. Maybe the requirement to use your PTO first is only if you have a use it or lose it policy instead of it accruing and carrying over to the next year. I hope that's the case for me because I'd rather not lose all my PTO!

jellie603

@tuxielove93 and @inthewoods23 Mat leave policies are a joke for the most part. My current company requires you to use your "leave bank" which is only for medical and is all of the unused PTO you couldn't roll over from last year. Then you use only your accrued PTO. And then STD kicks in at 60% pay. You can supplement with PTO at 40% for full pay I'm opting to keep that for doctors appointments etc.

My old company had a phenomenal policy. You got your 6 or 8 weeks depending on delivery method and then they gave you 2 weeks to use for your PTO if you had it. And then they gave you 3 weeks of "parental" leave that you could use from birth up until 1 year of life. You could use it all at once or days here and there for appointments etc. I found that so incredibly helpful.

I just emailed my HR team to ask them to build me a maternity leave schedule. They will mark off however many weeks you want (12 for FMLA, STD, PTO etc.), how long that specific benefit lasts, and how much you get paid on that benefit day. It is wicked helpful to have a visual to see how much PTO I am using, how much of my salary I am getting etc. Maybe reach out and see if you guys have someone who can do that up for you? I've worked in HR before and it is a nightmare sometimes trying to keep all of the policies and dates of kick-in straight. 

zwink1

@tuxielove93 & @inthewoods23,  my office is a smaller satellite office of our main office.  We're far enough away that we don't qualify for FMLA while the main office does.  I was the first person to take mat leave for this office when I had DS, and it was a pain in the ass then because they kept trying to argue with me about FMLA when we didn't qualify to begin with.  I told HR then that they needed to get their ish together and make an actual policy for this office, or not complain when we figured out something that worked for us.  

Flash forward 3 yrs later and my co-worker is trying to work out her mat leave.  Still no leave policy for this office and she had to battle with them again.  

I haven't even told them I'm pregnant yet.  But I am looking forward to not having to argue with them about my mat leave this time... bbyyyeeeee.  That said, my company makes us use our accrued PTO contemporaneously with STD during leave to "top up" the benefits so you get paid at 100% until your PTO runs out.  Then you have no PTO when you cone back with a brand new baby who needs a lot of care and appointments, so super logical.  I think that's pretty common though.  

LJMoon6

Trying to figure out parental leave is such a headache! MH on the other hand gets nothing. Zero. Nada. So that’s super easy to figure out. He’s currently a union employee but if he had a different job, working for the company instead, he would get 12 weeks 100% paid. So basically operators=nothing, supervisors=12 weeks. It’s bull shit.

inthewoods23

@zwink1 that doesn't even make sense.... aren't you eligible for FMLA as long as the company you work for has 50+ employees and not just how many work in your particular office location?

zwink1

@inthewoods23, not necessarily.  It has to be 50+ employees within 75 miles of your worksite.  We have way over 50 employees in the company, but there are under 20 at our office, and we're just shy of 100 miles from the main office.  

tuxielove93

I'm sorry mat leave is such a disaster for everyone. It makes me feel a bit better that for once it's not just my husbands company. I know without a doubt they're going to screw this up and screw up his pay because they can't change anything with pay without him getting less than what he should. 

But also. Why do companies have to make this so difficult during an already stressful time!? 

bearsandbeets7

I was shocked when I looked at the maternity leave for my company. They give us 16 weeks paid 100%. DHs is a whole other story though. He works in a big plant and has a set rotation which gives him 7 days off in a row once a month because he works 12 hour shifts. They don’t necessarily give you vacation or PTO, they just do a payout of it at the beginning of the year so you have to save it for if you do take time off which is then unpaid. He has heard a few different things about paternity leave but has come to the conclusion that either way however long he will only get 60% of his pay. So we probably won’t have him take much time off at all. 

I am super thankful for my company but maternity leave is so messed up in the US in general. 

runnergirl2018

Mat leave in the US is such a joke. So glad some of you get some leave!  
I had no leave at the company i worked for when I was pregnant with my son, just got to use PTO and then STD for 6 or 8 weeks depending on how the kid was born at 60% pay

Now i work for a very small business and i have no type of paid leave of any kind whatsoever.  We also don’t qualify for FMLA protection, but I’m not necessarily worried about that. I’m saving up and living small right now so i can take 8-12 weeks off. The upside is that hubby’s company offers 3-6 month paid leave at 100% and since i have no paid leave they think he would be considered the primary care giver and get 6 months.- so thankful for that to help with childcare and I’ll go down from 4 to 3 days a week of work for the first year or so

runnergirl2018

It also really irks me that companies refer to FMLA and STD as maternity leave.  They are not. FMLA just means that you can take 12 unpaid weeks off without getting fired.  And short term disability means that you have a medical issue that prevents you from working. Where’s the facepalm emoji? 

courtneyqdk

My WTF this week is that we were all just SUPER sick for a week - thought it was covid - had to isolate for 5 days, ended up testing negative. My son went back to preschool Monday and Tuesday, I only went back Tuesday because my school just changed the isolation rules and I had to be clear... anyway. My son just puked ALL NIGHT and all day today and round 2 of isolation begins. He doesn't have any secondary symptoms so it's shorter isolation this time, once he stops throwing  up, but literally I have worked one day in the last week and now I have to isolate AGAIN. (our province has an "entire household" isolation policy - not that it matters as I don't have childcare when he's not allowed at preschool. 

Working parents right now... this is impossible!!!! I am marking papers in the middle of the night trying to send my students feedback because end of semester and finals coming up. 

Anyway... huge rant.. very stressful week(s) over here. I ordered a pizza to make myself feel better tonight and it's kind of helping. 

Hope everyone is having a better week than this! 

knottie_name

It makes me sad to hear some of these stories... in another country 6 to 8 weeks plus PTO wouldn't be "phenomenal" 😭 of course really happy that you're getting something more than other companies would do, that's great. It's just that I'm not from the US originally and I am still reeling from finding out the situation with maternity leave here. Sending strength vibes to anyone currently fighting for more support 💪💪💪 I really hope you win

cscrzldbg

While my husband was active duty military, fathers got 10 days...if they're lucky. Deployed, TDY, at training of some kind, etc. -- So sad, too bad.

My husband also lost out on his days following our first move that are supposed to allow us to get settled. 

Unfortunately, we learned a lot the hard way or by loss with the military. In some ways, I'm glad he's not active anymore. Other days, I miss it.

His current job hired him right after our last was born. He was offered the job 2 weeks prior to her birth but didn't start until 2 weeks after. So, we don't know what they have available for him. None of the other guys have had kids since we've been there.

I know most of the leave policy sucks; it all comes out of his comp time. The comp time is reset and so pays out all but 96 hours the last paycheck of June. Gotta love the timing of this baby to be coming the week after he's down to a 2 shift coverage and the busiest month of the year (his first year, he was home for 3 days only in July) meaning tons of mandatory OT. C'est la vie! Lol.

I'm not complaining too much. He drives me crazy when he's home for long periods. The thought of more than 4 weeks off is actually horrible. A couple weeks at a time is good for me as long as he doesn't have too many OTs taking up his off days. I get more concerned with him burning out.

LJMoon6

@bearsandbeets7 YH’s job sounds oddly like MH’s. He works rotating shifts too. Works every other weekend (12h shifts), and gets a full 7 days off in a row every 4 weeks. MH does actually get PTO though. And 2 weeks sick time per year, but any time he actually uses his sick time he gets an occurrence, and you can’t get more than 4 occurrences in a year… so the sick time is basically a joke. Your 16 weeks at 100% pay is amazing though. I thought my 6 weeks was good lol. How sad is that.

@runnergirl2018 100% this! My “maternity leave” is actually a combination of what my company gives me and STD. It’s such a joke!

@courtneyqdk Omg. That sounds awful. I’m so sorry. I hope you LO starts feeling better soon!

inthewoods23

I just unsubscribed from an email list and the webpage that the link goes to saying "unsubscribe successful" had a pop up that suggested providing my email address to subscribe to their newsletter and get 15% off (or something to that effect).

I'm sure the site is set up for that pop up to appear when someone first enters the site, even if it's because they clicked the unsubscribe button in an email but still what the heck lol