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March 2022 Moms
Panaceia
member
Weekly Check In 11/22
Panaceia
member
EDD / Weeks + Days:
Baby is the size of a(n) / interesting fact:
FTM/STM/TTM+:
Team Finding Out/Blue/Pink/Green:
Upcoming Appointments:
How are you feeling?:
Rants/Raves:
Questions:
GTKY: Let's talk about our SOs. Is your SO your *typical* type? What attracted you to them? What was your very first thought/reaction when you met them? Did you think you would end up together? Have kids together? Let's hear it!
Re: Weekly Check In 11/22
Rave: DD1 had her first night in a toddler bed last night 😭 They grow up so fast! She was so excited and so proud and did really well overall. We shall see how the rest of the week goes!
Rave 2: I’ve been feeling pretty consistent movement for the last few weeks, particularly when I sit down or lay down. I enjoy that special connection so much!
My SO was not my *typical* type, but that was probably for the best 🤣 My SO was cute, quiet, smart, and funny. One of my favorite things when we first started dating was what a good listener he was. I was not looking for something serious when we first met, so I can’t say at that point I thought we would end up together or have kids together! Heck, I didn’t even understand why he wanted me to meet his parents 🤣 But after two years of dating (the second long-distance while he was working on his graduate education) I wanted to find out if we would be a good match for the long-term, as there was so much I loved about how we balanced each other. So, I took a leap of faith when my grant-funded job ended and moved half way across the country to live with him for his last three years of schooling. Once we got engaged, I knew we would have kids together since it is something we both imagined for our future together. Seeing him as a dad to DD1 is so heart warming!
@animator_mama i have an anterior placenta too- it sucks lol. But i'm just a few days ahead of you and this last week has been a lot move movement so I'm hopeful for you to feel those kicks at better times soon! Will your H have time off when the baby comes? I know with my DD, H was excited, but the bond really happened after she was born, and he was home for several weeks. He did a lot of intensive parenting and i think it really set them up for success.
EDD / Weeks + Days: 23+1 3/20
hah. I don't even know how to answer this. I don't think I really had a type. I was in therapy before i met MH and my therapist made me make a vision board (literally with photos and a list of characteristics) of the partner I was looking for. I didn't do it so 20 mins before my appt all that was left was the LL bean catalogue in my house so i cut out all those photos, i did a little better on my characteristic list. Well, shouldn't have made fun of my therapist because MH is the most bearded, flannelled, outdoorsy guy ever haha. Which i wouldn't trade for the world, but always makes me laugh. Not to mention he checked every box on my "ideal partner" list. He's also extremely progressive, supportive, and a great partner. I lucked out
@animator_mama hahaha oh yes...these babies and their MOTN dance parties 😅😅
I think for a lot of fathers, it's hard to feel connected until baby is born. It seems totally normal and common. But apparently as soon as they hold baby, it's real and the bond starts. MH sings to baby every single night. (TW* It was an anxiety thing when I was pregnant with DS. I was CONVINCED that if he missed a night, I would lose baby. But now it's just a nice tradition. He still sings the lullaby to DS and has never missed a night).
And when baby got strong enough to make kicks felt on the outside, I let DH lie there and try to feel for them.
EDD / Weeks + Days: 23 wks. EDD March 21
TLDR: I'm surprised it happened but sonkucky it did
Hahahha well... DH came up to me at change out at work (when he was relieving me at work). We spent an hour chatting, which included my story about how I had just done a ride along for a hot med student, and how the next day, I ended up in the ER and he was my doctor...
After an hour chatting, I was late for a date so I headed out. By the time I got to the grocery store, he had found me on FB through a coworker, and messaged me. Messaging on FB is super inconvenient, so after a few, I gave him my # and told him if he wanted to keep talking, to text me. (He later admitted "I had it all worked out... I was going to give you my # in 2 more messages!"😅)
He asked me on a date.
I changed out with him again a few days later, and he said "about our date....can we just...skip all the games and fake 'trying to impress' stuff? Can we just be ourselves? I want to get to know YOU..."
So that won major points.
He also came up with a super fun plan for our date.
He was about 90 min late for our date. He was non-stop apologetic. He was SO upset. I had to remind him that I do the same job, and I am completely aware of how out of control getting overtime is, and not to worry at all.
I had just bought a house and was renovating it. So after dinner, we went there so I could show it off. We ended up talking until 5 am (he had literally been up for over 24 hours by then). We talked about literally everything. Opinions on religion, politics, what we wanted in the future, medical problems (including my diagnosis of infertility but my strong desire to have kids), life history. Every topic was comfortable and easy. We also agreed no-hanky panky until we were serious.
He was on vacation the next week, so for our second date, his poor colour-blind self, put up with meeting my parents, to come paint my new house 😂😂
On Christmas morning, (we had known each other 2 weeks) I woke up struggling to breathe. Like...should have called 911 bad. I was working nights that night, but was supposed to have Christmas dinner with the family. I cancelled because I didn't want to put my immunocompromised grandparents at risk. When DH found out, he packed up a plate of his Christmas dinner, got in his car and drove clear across the city so I wouldn't be alone on Christmas. He was willing to ruin his own Christmas, so that I wasn't alone!!🥰 (I didn't let him.)
So I was pretty sure I knew I was going to marry him then.
However, the way he acted when I got the shock of my life and got oopsie pregnant on our first time together, definitely solidified that he was the one I was going to spend the rest of my life with.
We went on a 11 day trip together where he proposed. Spent nearly every minute together, and yet when I got home, I was SAD that I wasn't going to be with him 24/7😅. I have always liked my space and independence, and get overstimulated and need alone time. But somehow it was different with him. I have always felt...whole. calm. Like I can breathe properly if I'm close to him Very strange feeling for me. Haha.
12/7 repeat US for choroid plexus cyst on brain and dilated renal artery.
My SO and I actually "dated" in 7th grade. Never went anywhere just boyfriend/girlfriend for a couple weeks. Fast forward about 20 years later, we end up working at the same place, hired on with months of each other. I had ended a semi serious relationship a few months prior and was not interested in pursuing another one. He was VERY persistent and just wanted me to come hang out with him as friends...after 4 months of him pestering me, I gave in. 2 months later I was already moving in...7 years later married with 2 yo DD and baby boy on the way. Life is funny. I was so resistant to him and now I can not imagine not having him in my life. He brings out the best parts of me and is an amazing father.
@animator_mama i worried with DD that husband wasn't connecting with her during pregnancy, but when she was born all my worries were gone. He was the most excellent birth partner and when he held her the first time, you could see the love he had for her. It will come. Its hard for them to connect I think sometimes until then. I do try to keep DH involved as much as possible, let him feel kicks and go to appts of possible.
@animator_mama yay for feeling movement! But, yea it looks like both of my boys enjoy 3am dance parties in my belly 🥱 My brother is having his first in January and def not connecting, but I told him when they get here your whole world just changes and you just are a dad, he’ll do great it takes some longer than others. Sometimes they just need to hold them for it all to click
@goldfishcraker ahhh you know! I can’t wait to hear!!!!
@friends-fan love the childhood bf, that was us too. So fun that they were part of our childhood
@rachelredhead omg scheduling!! That’s sooo exciting!! I can’t believe we are that close now 😳
EDD / Weeks + Days: 24 weeks +5 days, due March 9
Oh boy, so my DH and I met in 7th grade. He was into another girl at the time and she had told me he was stalking her and she needed help. (Later discovered she was a toxic jerk, but she was my best friend at the time).
I basically told DH to leave my friend alone and threatened to get teachers/principal involved. We kind of despised each other out of principle.
Fast forward to high school we discover the same girl had ‘broken up’ with both of us as friends because she wanted to be popular and both of us were ‘too embarrassing/ unpopular’ for her image. We both were also Pokémon fans, so we became friends. Not super close or anything at this point.
For junior and senior year, we both elected to go to a technical high school. Him for pro-start/ culinary, me fo graphic design. We had basic subjects together, particularly senior year, and I realized he was a Christian, which was a big deal to me and I saw how kind he treated others, etc.
I admitted to a girl in my graphic design class I had a bit of a crush on him and she decided to take it upon herself at our next shared class to pester him relentlessly to ask me out. I was super shy so I frantically tried to stop her, apologizing and saying I had no idea where she got the idea from.
We took the same bus back from the tech school and would talk at times, and one Friday he slipped a note onto my seat as he got off.
He had asked me out via note, thinking he had all weekend to wait for an answer, but I had his email from a group project and scared him with a prompt ‘yes’ that night.
It was 2011 when we started dating and we had our ups and downs, but married in 2017.
Never would have guessed back in 7th grade that in 2021 we would be married with an 18 month old son and a baby girl due early 2022, but here we are.
@rachelredhead I'm still deciding on having a 3rd or not, so no help there. But my older sis had her tubes tied during her c-section and then ended up getting it reversed 6 years later. Not that you will change your mind, but she got pregnant pretty quickly after the reversal, so it is possible if you do.
@friends-fan I haven't had any issues come up on ultrasounds, but I'm so sorry you have that worry to think about. Your OB not being concerned is a great sign, though I'm sure I'd still be worried too.
@goldfishcraker Awe I love your DH story.
@morgantu Sorry about the legging snafu. That stinks. And dang, that is a lot of snow! I hope DD has lots of fun in it!
@animator_mama Yes! Baby is super active in the early morning for me too. It is sweet and fun but also annoying lol. As for DH, I think it is totally normal for them to not feel connected yet. It is still so abstract for them and I really think most men have a hard time connecting until the baby is born. And even then it may take some time. This is a whole new person that you will both need to get to know! I remember feeling a little surprised by that. You love them more than anything but there is still a big adjustment phase.
@jenis_fan_for_life Awe a toddler bed! Such a big milestone! It is crazy how fast it goes by.
EDD / Weeks + Days: 25+4 3/3
DH isn't totally my type but he also is? I don't know how to explain it. We met on a recreation kickball team and I knew from the first time we talked that we would date. Even when things were hard at the beginning I had a strong feeling I needed to stick it out and I'm so glad I did. He is pretty perfect for me.
Oh my. Well he definitely was not my typical type but his persistence paid off. I guess saying what I thought was my type all those years was wrong. We are both strong personalities so I’m shocked we have lasted 😂. He’s always been super supportive of everything I do and is an amazing father. He has been great during this bedrest business and is working full time , taking care of DS, and maintaining everything in the house.
@rachelredhead, I am pretty decided on getting the tubes tied, already signed the papers. I declined last time around because I wasn't sure I was done. But now with baby 3 I am pretty sure (still only 98% sure). I think there will always be part of me that wants to keep producing snuggly newborn babies; but practically speaking, I don't think 4+ kids is realistic for our lifestyle, so I am stopping at 3. In my research I found out that an interesting side effect of having the tubes tied is a reduction in risk for ovarian cancer. That was interesting to me. If I was giving birth vaginally, I would rather DH get the vasectomy, but since I am doing my third c-section, I agreed that it may as well happen while I am already on the operating table.
EDD / Weeks + Days: 23
@animator_mama I was the same way with my first. And alllll 3 of my kids liked to party around 3am:/ I had an anterior placenta with both girls and didn't feel my first until around 26 or 28 weeks. My SO had trouble connecting to my first also. Honestly I think he just didn't know what to do with her. As soon as she was old enough to communicate and do more things he became super dad and the girls have him wrapped around their little fingers!
@morgantu I'm loving your story about your SO 🤣
@goldfishcraker Sorry about the reflux:/ Mine is juuuust starting to kick in. And I love how you got pregnant your first time together!
@friends-fan Not the same but DD1 had a dilated kidney that resolved after birth. FX the next scan shows all is good ❤
@rachelredhead I have friends who had their tubes tied during c-section. The recovery was a bit trickier but other than that they had no issues. My OB has asked a few times but I told him at the last appointment we're not 100% sure we're done. Plus also pretty sure nature will be taking care of my fertility pretty soon on its own anyways 🤣
@gembud I'm soooo glad you've been able to do something nice for yourself. You deserve it mama!!!!
@faithmovesmountains I'm glad your H is helping out. I hope you start feeling better soon ❤
@kgg2241 Yay to Vegas! I'm jealous!
@Nik102 I'm so glad you found someone to do the surgery and that everything is good so far. FX everything stays quiet and uneventful now until term!
@realhousewife519 My OB told me to go for the glucose test between 24 and 28 weeks. I'm going early just to get it over with. I'm worried I'm not going to be able to keep it down this time though:/
@animator_mama I think if your husband can feel the baby movements with you, it might make him feel closer? I know my DH loves feeling the babies move. Maybe have a special nickname for the lil babe? He'll definitely feel more connected when he arrives!
@rachelredhead I'm 90% sure that I am getting my tubes tied. However, there is a part of me that wants a girl since we will have three boys. Not sure if DH is on board. We would need to test the remaining three embryos we have from IVF if we want to do that.
EDD / Weeks + Days: 23+5, 3/16/22
I was recently seeing someone else, and it kinda fizzled out. When we met via a mutual friend, he was more interested in me. He got my number, and we went on a brunch date. We had some great conversation, and turns out that we had a lot in common. We also shared that we wanted to have kids, travel, etc. The emotional and physical attraction was there, so I had a good feeling about him after the first few months. We actually moved in together after 7 months, and got engaged after a year and a half together. We'll be married 5 years next year!
@rachelredhead my husband and I are having the tunes tied conversation now. We have our girl and if all goes well with this pregnancy, we will have a boy. We feel complete with the 2. I'm going to talk to my OB at my next appointment as my insurance requires a statement from my dr saying that it is medically necessary or they won't cover it. I'm 98% certain with my decision ...all factors considered for our situation, it works. DH was good after 1. We considered him having a vasectomy but he isn't insured so it makes more sense for me to have it done after delivery.
@Nik102 Thats frustrating that they won't return your calls! Thankful your surgery went well
@kgg2241 That sounds like such fun! Enjoy your trip!
@faithmovesmountains Yay for HS sweethearts 💜
@gembud that prenatal massage sounds amazing!
@animator_mama my husband has said that he didn’t really feel connected to our son until we were home for about a week. Then something just clicked for him when he was cuddled up with DS one day. I tried everything to try to get him to connect while pregnant, but he was just a bit freaked out by the whole “there’s an actual human growing inside of you” idea (he’s a bit squeamish). This time around he’s more excited, actually touches my belly to try to feel movement, etc. Just know, he’ll get there in his own time. I’ve heard the saying “a woman becomes a mom when she sees the positive test or starts to feel the baby love. A man becomes a dad when the baby is in his arms”. It’s not always true, but sometimes I think it applies.
@goldfishcraker I just love the story of you and your SO. Sounds like a true love story!
@friends-fan glad you’re finally getting some good movement! I hate having an anterior placenta, but it’s such a relief to feel the baby moving. @rachelredhead I just turned 41, and am totally blaming my hip and pelvic pain on my “geriatric joints”! As far as your Q: We are definitely done after this, and if I have a Cesarean, my doc will take care of my tubes. That is decided for sure. It’s actually one of the reasons I am having trouble deciding between scheduling a C and attempting a VBAC. It makes me a little sad to know there for sure will be no more pregnancies, but it’s also a little bit of a relief.
@faithmovesmountains Im so glad to hear your DH is taking good care of you while you recover.
@kgg2241 yay for a 2 day work week! Hope you have a fun trip!!
@Nik102 Way to push and advocate for yourself!! I’m so glad to hear that you found someone to do the cerclage and that you’re recovering well. Will keep praying for a smooth ride here on out.
The only traits that seem to be my type are smart and funny; and my husband is definitely smart and funny. We met through a mutual friend in 2001, when we were in college. We dated for a couple of years, but ultimately broke up. Neither of us was ready for that deep of a relationship at that point. Our families were devastated because everyone was expecting a proposal, not a break up. After a couple of years, we reconnected and stayed good friends. Fast forward to 2014, and we started talking a lot more regularly. I had moved back to our hometown from our college town a few years before, but decided to take a weekend trip to see him. By the end of the weekend we were back together. We did the long distance thing for about 6 months, and then he moved back to our hometown so we could be together. We were married September 2017, and brought our son home from the hospital on our 1 year wedding anniversary.
SO wasn’t my typical type but I fell in love with him more so on his demeanor, character and he’s just always been such a caring man. When I first met him, I thought he was nice and I was also drawn to him- I can’t explain it but I feel like the world was pulling me towards him. My father died the same month that I met my husband and I feel like my dad chose him. It’s crazy but I felt all the meant to be’s With him. I couldn’t imagine this life without him 13.5 years later. We’ve both always wanted kids
@MusicalFamily In the time we've been together we've gone from not being sure we wanted kids, to me definitely wanting one, to SO definitely wanting 2...to SO definitely wanting 3...and if history tells me anything, if we get this little guy safely in our arms I'm sure 10 minutes after delivery SO will be dropping hints about a 4th...😅
@achanceintime, @Panaceia, @kgg2241, @gembud, @goldfishcraker, @morgantu I very much appreciate the advice and support on my husband. I'm sure you're right that he'll feel more connected as he gets to hold our baby. I think he was a little worried because he thought at the US, he would finally feel like it was all real since he got to see the baby moving. Hopefully, he'll actually be able to feel him kicking soon and that will help too. Also, I'm glad I'm not the only one with super early baby dance parties. lol.
ETA tag Panaceia lol
@achanceintime yay for viability! I see a cardiologist regularly and he didn't seem concerned when I brought up that I was have occasional heart palpitations. He said as long as it isn't more that 10-20% of the time then it is probably just a part of pregnancy. Just to help ease your mind a little. I go back in a few weeks for an echo so we will see what he says then. It sounds like you'll have a lovely week with DH at home. Enjoy!
@achanceintime I have been having palpitations too. I notice them sometimes pre-pregnancy/baseline, but they have gotten waaay more noticeable during this pregnancy. I mentioned it to my midwife - they weren’t concerned but thought it was worth referring me to cardiology just to be thorough. I saw a cardiologist and they did an ECG in office, detailed history, a few labs, and recommended a home holter monitor for a little while. Everything so far (including the home monitor) has come back normal and indicates some ‘extra beats’ that are normal and not concerning. Having the detailed exam/etc all come back normal has given me lots of peace of mind!
probably support a low level of concern from an OB perspective.
@animator_mama I also have an anterior placenta and it definitely took me longer to feel movement. At 25 weeks now it is getting better. Also, I think men don't fully bond till the baby arrives. I wouldn't be worried about it. I think it is hard for them because they aren't really directly involved as much until the baby is here. If he is worried about it, I'm sure he will be a great dad and bond with the new baby.
@morgantu Definitely excited for the short work week! I can't believe you are getting snow already. We have lucked out this year so far and I'm hoping it stays that way.
@goldfishcraker Your story with DH is so sweet. Must be nice coming up on the holiday season again and be reminded of your first Christmas with him going out of his way to be there for you!
@rachelredhead If for some reason I end up getting a C section, I will get my tubes tied/removed (whatever thy recommend) at the same time. I am definitely done after this one and just assume do it if it isn't a big deal. Otherwise, another IUD for me
@gembud Yay for the prenatal massages!! I have been debating getting one. You may have inspired me to just go and do it.
@kgg2241 Have fun in Vegas with your sister!! That sounds awesome and I'm sure we could all use a fun trip these days.
@Nik102 That sounds stressful. Fingers crossed for keeping that baby in as long as possible.
@jennifer_m21 That's amazing that they are helping with some of the big ticket items! I haven't looked into getting a post delivery belly band. It sounds like something to add to the to do list. I'm getting a belly band for using now because I get a lot or round ligament pain when I'm on long walks or working out. My OB recommended it to help.
@Panaceia I'm so sorry you are still struggling with being sick. At least March is getting closer and closer. Family is always tough. The holidays and extra time with them never make things easier. Hopefully you can find some time for yourself soon.
EDD / Weeks + Days: March7th/ 25+1
He is exactly my type. We are very much a like and I always thought I would end up with someone similar to me vs the opposites attracting idea. We starting dating very quickly after each of us were out of serious relationships. The timing was awful, but we just clicked and it was so easy being together. I grew up thinking relationships were hard and always required work. With him I've learned that relationships don't have to be hard. There may be hard moments, but the relationship itself shouldn't feel that way.