Would you like to have a Facebook group now or wait?

MusicalFamily

Let’s begin one (in):

goldfishcraker

As much as I hate TB format and how difficult it is to use, I think taking a little more time to establish a solid foundation/relationship with those of us who would like to move over, would be beneficial.

I know we have had a slow board and a lot of the members here haven't had much opportunity to interact yet. The lurker thread has helped get a couple people into posting a bit, which is great!

But it would be nice to get to know the people prior to the move over, as those groups tend to get close and personal and share photos of kiddos.

I know in my last group, we ended up discovering some...fakers...in TB about 7 months in.

I don't know what our plan is for who is moving over? My last group, it was only people who had interacted a significant amount. I think it would be a pretty small group for us at this point.

Panaceia

I agree with @goldfishcraker . With my last BMB (July '19) we moved over at the beginning of June. The admins allowed people in based on number of posts (basically there was a post minimum you had to have met to qualify to be part of the group if that makes sense?) I think for us it helped to make sure the people who were being included were supportive, real and that we were all pretty familiar with everyone's personalities. I think we have about 50 members in our FB group but 2.5 years later and there are maybe 20 of us who still post regularly...but we are a pretty tight knit group. I'll move whenever everyone else wants, but I was thinking maybe mid January to early February might give more people time to participate ahead of the move? But again, I'm good with whatever the majority want 🙂

morgantu

+1 for waiting a little longer. My last bmb is great, but had some drama with the FB move with some people who didn't participate until the 11th hour and didn't get the invite for the FB group. I'd rather give some more opportunity for people to consistently participate before the move. 

rachelredhead

I was a December vote but I think January makes sense too. In my last BMB we had one mama who had a preemie experience and others who went early. I was glad we already had a FB group established for a bit before anyone gave birth. So ideally I’d like to make the move in early third tri but obviously I’ll join when we all decide to make the leap. 

faithmovesmountains

I voted December myself, but agree with the general idea of getting to know everyone better. I hope I count as active enough to be included, mainly because you all have already helped a lot just by being able to talk and interact with you.

kgg2241

My thoughts echo @rachelredhead. I voted December but January is fine with me. My last BMB moved to a private group in July (Sept BMB) and then to FB in October after all the babies arrived. We didn't have any drama that I remember, but we are a pretty small group too. 

nursejenn5

here to share basically the same sentiments. I think it may be good to wait a bit longer let those who really want to be a part of a group show that over the next couple months. 

jenis_fan_for_life

I support the replies above! Though I really find the Bump platform functionality to be very cumbersome and I tend to be more cautious with what I share online no matter what the platform, I think January is a reasonable timeframe. Do we want to have ‘guidelines’ for participation that would allow entry into this future Facebook group? If so, I like the idea of making that known sooner rather than later to allow people more time to participate in that way. 

achanceintime

I am good with whatever the group decides. I didn’t have a community like this when I was pregnant with my son, and I’m late to the group here (mostly because I didn’t know this app had a community feature initially lol). But between this group and another I found on FB, I’m loving having a group of mommas who are all in a similar situation to chat with and get/provide support with. Since I am late to the game as it were, I second @jenis_fan_for_life in the idea of laying out and guidelines or expectations for acceptance in to the future FB group ahead of time. Just so we are all on the same page. 

Panaceia

@jenis_fan_for_life I agree that we should probably decide on some criteria for FB admission. Personally I don't think I would be comfortable posting pics of my kids and family and sharing more personal info with people who have only posted on here a few times. I think also people who respond to others and interact with others is important...so not just posting once a week on the check ins, but actually responding to other posts and showing support to others I think is important too if that makes sense? I would love to hear what others think. But I definitely think it would be good to come up with some specific criteria so people know ahead of time. There was definitely some drama in my last group when we made the move, so it would be good to avoid that!

jenis_fan_for_life

@Panaceia I think you make an excellent point. One of my favorite things about this group is that we can lean on each other for questions, concerns, and support. I think that is a key characteristic that we would want to continue in the Facebook group. 

morgantu

So in my last group, the process looked like this: 
We voted (via TB) on admins for the FB group. I think there are 4 or 5, but that's probably overkill, tbh. 
Then we had a process for others getting into the FB group- you found an admin on FB, sent them a DM with a photo of your bump and the date, when they would invite you to the group. 
The admins were people the general group trusted to make the call of who had participated and who was a definite yes to make the move. 
I think there were some that the admin group internally debated about, then made the call. 
If they were torn, they would ask those who were already in the FB group what they thought about so-and-so making the move over, and then delete the thread. 
Some members weren't comfortable or ready to move to FB right away. Those who had the time/capacity tried to keep up on both platforms so late-comers/lurkers could participate for a while and join the fb group later. 

Not sure if this is the way we should do it, but context for some of those who haven't been in a bmb before on how it could look.  

animator_mama

I feel like it would be easier to post more if the group was on fb. I voted for January but would be comfortable with any decision. I agree with @Panaceia that avoiding drama within the group is important as well as it being a safe place to post questions, concerns,  or celebrations.  I'm comfortable with any criteria that the group decides on. 😊

friends-fan

I was a December vote as well, but do agree with a January move.  This type of group is new to me.  I wasn't aware groups like this even existed with my last pregnancy and was overjoyed to find it this time! I feel I'm a bit socially awkward but I'm  trying to contribute and have more conversation as the days goes.  Hopefully I will meet the criteria to be moved over, but I will understand if not. All of you have been so helpful with questions I have had or just to follow along in conversations.  I need to join in more and become more familiar with everyone though! I will be working on that.  

goldfishcraker

@morgantu that sounds very similar to what we did.
Our bump group had 4 weekly check in threads (one for each week of the month) and I think we ended up voting in an admin from each (maybe accidentally haha).
Those that applied (same method as you), were accepted by the admins if they were frequent posters/supporters.
There were a few that none of the admins were familiar with and it was put to a vote to the whole FB group. People could say "oh yeah, she was super active in these 3 weekly threads" or there were some no one had ever seen. Some applied who "never made an into but posted a standalone thread about themselves once". 

We didn't expect everyone to be a daily poster. But frequent enough that people recognized them and had some sort of relationship formed with at least a few members. And like @panaciea said, offered support/interaction, not just once a week "here is my life" and then gone again for the week.

Also, I assume our group will be set to private settings?

I don't post my son on social media, EXCEPT for my bump group. 😅

goldfishcraker

Also I just want to say that I'm super relieved that no one seems to have taken offence or anything to my initial comment. It wasn't meant to be offensive in any way, but I was hesitant posting it and it being taken the wrong way. My anxiety was super high 😅

Panaceia

Similar to @morgantu . We voted in 3 admins (I think it was good to have 3 as one of them does not really participate in our group anymore so at least we still have 2 more). Everyone who wanted to make the move posted in a thread. They invited people based on number of posts and participation. Once you got an invite and joined you had a week to post a selfie with your bump visible, a specific household item, and a piece of paper with your Bump user name and the date. I liked that this was a thread in our actual group so we all got to see eachother and get used to the change in user names (I don't use my real name on FB since it's only for BMBs so I also posted my real name with my user name in the photo). 

I think if we agree on admins I am happy to trust their decisions in terms of who to admit etc. I am happy with whatever process everyone wants to use...but might it be useful to vote on admins soon ish? That way they can consciously think about who should be included starting now ish and maybe keep a list rather than trying to sift through everything at the last minute? Just a thought...

realhousewife519

I am pretty private on social media. I have only ever posted a few pics of the kids ever and I keep my friend list small. I never made the move with my last two BMBs over to FB just because they were big groups, I didn't participate that much, and at the time I was barely using social media. Not sure what I'll do this time but I am enjoying the bump for now! I guess we will wait and see! I am happy to say that this group has been really friendly and supportive. Some of my prior BMBs I didn't engage when I saw others getting catty with one another, but there has literally been none of that here - just kindness - even towards random knotties starting threads

Panaceia

@realhousewife519 My first BMB had a super bully on it and everyone just sort of followed her with the exception of like 1 lovely person...so I only every really lurked. The same bully tried to join a different BMB a few years later and got called out by the group (they kept asking her if everything was OK in her life and if they could do anything to help since she seemed to be so miserable all the time 🤣). My second BMB was amazing and I love my FB group with them. I don't do social media either, but I do post pics of my kids on my FB group with my second BMB since it's a private group and I trust everyone on there. 

achanceintime

@Panaceia I agree that deciding on admins well before making the move to FB is a smart move. That way they have plenty of time to make decisions on the procedures and keep track of involvement. 

jennifer_m21

Agree with the sentiments above. This group has been friendly, supportive, and no drama! I also voted for January because December seems to be a busy month in itself with the holidays!

goldfishcraker

Not that this is the official place for it, but I nominate @Panaceia for an admin. I don't know how you do it, but you are always there and supporting everyone! ❤️

morgantu

@goldfishcraker +1000 to that. for sure, if you're willing, @Panaceia!

MusicalFamily

Yes I agree with you all! It’s so hard to post on here all the time- I feel like I get a little lost lol! I wish there was notifications or something. I’m happy with the wait. Also happy that we have not had any drama on here. There was drama in my first bump group which never happened on Facebook. We moved to Facebook in December and we were due in February. So January looks like a good month to make the switch. The group should be private and then maybe create some criteria for the people who want to join. We didn’t do a screener in my first bump group but just our screen names from the bump. I’d feel better with what others have mentioned with the criteria to be in the group and then posting a selfie with a household object. 

Panaceia

@goldfishcraker @morgantu Awww thanks guys ❤

I'm happy to throw my name in the mix for consideration...I've never been an admin before but happy to learn:) I think all of our regular posters would make great admins! Maybe anyone interested in being an admin can post here and then we can compile a list and choose maybe 3 or 4 as a group? I know @jenis_fan_for_life has experience as admin and has expressed interest in being admin. I'll throw in some of our more frequent posters if any of them are interested? 
@goldfishcraker
@morgantu
@kgg2241
@rachelredhead
@gembud
@MusicalFamily
@night_nurse
@nursejenn5
@faithmovesmountains
@realhousewife519
@achanceintime
@jennifer_m21
I haven't added everyone, just a few off the top of my head:) Anyone else who wants to be added or anyone on here so far who definitely does not want to do it?

Also, how many admin do we think we want? Thoughts?

goldfishcraker

I'm fine doing it if people want me to but I'm also fine with any of the people you listed @Panaceia, I feel all are frequent participants and supporters!

MusicalFamily

@Panaceia you are the first person that comes to mind for admin! Also agree with the list you made  

gembud

@Panaceia is BEYOND AMAZING would be an awesome admin, so blessed to have gotten to know her these past three years!

Panaceia

Thank you @MusicalFamily
Right back at ya @gembud . Love you lady 😘 

lurvleybunchococonuts

💯 @panaceia as an admin! I think @night-nurse would be a good pick also. I'd volunteer but I'm not on TB frequently enough and with soon to be a newborn, a 1 year old, and a 3 year old I don't anticipate finding more time 🤣🤣🤣 I'm going to attempt to be more active on here but no promises since #holidays.

I voted for sometime in January move. That way if we have any early babes we're settled or starting to get settled over there. December feels too soon and with holidays too hectic. I think picking/deciding on admin early January, giving them a few weeks to discuss rules/guidelines/etc and then planning the move mid-to late January would be a good timeline. Apologies if this is reiderating anyone. I skimmed to catch up while on break  

Sarah0335

I like the idea of January. I think Facebook is much easier to communicate through and be engaged with. I understand the desire to facilitate a smooth and seamless transition. 

I think January would be good to support any mamas that go early. My best friend has her first baby at 27 weeks and I remember how important the support was for her during that time. 

ernursemom4

Now would be great. I would love to bond with the March 2022 mamas and be able to offer support and words of encouragement as we count down to the big day🥰

ernursemom4

Still trying to figure out how to change this long name . I logged out and back in with no change . 

ernursemom4

figured it out !!!! Yayyyyyy

achanceintime

I agree @Panaceia would make a great admin! As for how many we need? I think 3 or 4. That way if 1 or 2 leave or become a lot less active, it doesn’t leave it all on 1 or 2 peoples shoulders. 

jenis_fan_for_life

I agree with nominating @Panaceia! ❤️ I also agree that 4 would be a good number, especially as all admins will be balancing the demands of a new baby.

Panaceia

Agree also that 4 sounds like a good number!

lurvleybunchococonuts

Only thought regard admin number, if something comes up and needs to have a tie breaker, would it be better to have an odd number admin? Or would it then go to the group to decide? I can't really think of a hypothetical atm, but I know it was something discussed in both my Nov '18 & Nov '20 BMBs.

night_nurse

Worked three 12s in a row and catching up on all this! 

Definitely think January will make for a better transition. My last BMB initially transitioned with 35ish members and now there are around 20 of us still in the group and we have all stayed active almost 4 years later.

3 or 5 admins are my vote. Odd number is best. We can also vote in a new admin in the future if someone bows out.

A poll to choose admin would be easiest as it’s too hard to count up comments. Top 3 votes are admins if they accept?

But really this can all be done in Jan. Still a month and a half to get to know each other!

faithmovesmountains

@Panaceia is definitely one of my nominees for admin. I agree with others, you are always so supportive and kind.