I was on call all weekend. Today i am post call but still had work to do. So for the last hour after finishing my work, I’ve been setting up my maternity leave in my calendar and getting my appointment book set for the year. I’m on June.
I also need to do laundry and grocery shop and read a book chapter for supervision and pay bills 🤦🏻♀️
I’m going to break some of this up between today and tomorrow because Brielle has dance and gymnastics today and I’m going to want a bath/nap lol
@angelz429 How long of a maternity leave are you taking?
AFM: I actually looked at the baby countdown part of the baby app I have. I usually just look at it for a vitamin reminder and to see how big baby is. I wasn't ready to realize I'm 15 weeks from my due date, and 12 weeks from when they wouldn't stop me from going into labor. So yeah, I'm over here silently freaking out.
@makingbacon for my son, I had 2 weeks paid off, and took 6 weeks unpaid (I was 24 and made 30k per year)
For my daughter, I was a resident and got 2 weeks maternity + my 3 weeks vacation + 1 week SL paid and took 5 weeks unpaid as a part time over 2 months (she was a 31 weeker in NICU after emergency c section)
this time, I get 12 weeks paid maternity, and can use up to 4 weeks of my saved sick/annual leave. I got permission to extend it part time over 2 months instead. So I’m doing 12 weeks off + 2 months of working 2.5 days per week.
I’m excited about this extended paid leave. AND at the same time, it’s not comparable to other countries. We’re so far behind. AND I have had shittier parental leave…. Which is just sad.
Maternity leave? What is this maternity leave you guys are speaking of? Haha just kidding…. Kind of. I had a few days off when I had my daughter in 2018. This time I’ll probably only have a few days off again but I’ll probably do part time from home the first 2 months, then 2 months of full time at home, then start going back in full time.
The state of maternity leave in this country is so disgusting. I feel very fortunate that my company gives 16 weeks fully paid + Massachusetts now has state leave so I should get another month partially paid on top of that. But it's wild talking to friends from..... literally every other country that are able to take as much time as they need physically/emotionally and don't have a clock ticking down the second they give birth.
@angelz429 I’m glad you’ll be able to take more time for maternity leave this time!
I’m taking the full 12 weeks my company offers again. I get paid through my short term disability, so I’ll get 60% of my pay for 6 weeks and then I’ll be unpaid for the last 6 weeks. If I end up having a c-section, I’ll get 60% of my pay for 8 weeks. So it’s not great, but I’m glad we’re in a place financially that we can swing it.
Maternity leave in the US is appalling. It is very clear that as a country we are still operating like we are in traditional 50s households. I feel lucky that my state offers 90-100% paid family and medical leave for 12-16 weeks, even though I'm self-employed. It won't be much because I'm self-employed, but it's better than 0$ of income and I won't feel pressured to "get back to work" - that in itself is a privilege, on top of having a daycare that's a 7min walk from my office and they'll let me drop in to breastfeed if I want. This kind of thing should be standard.
@chgilmore I agree with you. I'm jealous you can do drop-in breastfeeding. Ours allows/encourages it at lunchtime, but I always worry that it's going to mess with baby's day when I have to travel during the day or overnight, so I've never done it.
I'm attempting to schedule all the travel I can for later in 3rd trimester to avoid traveling overnight right after getting back at 12 weeks. Holidays are messing it up a bit because my doctor usually grounds me from flying at 33 weeks, but I think we'll get everything done. I only took 6 weeks with DS1 and ended up traveling overnight for the first time when he was 9 weeks old. I'm trying to avoid as much early travel, outside of daytime travel, as I can. DH is going to have his hands full with 3 kids, and we don't have any family close who can help while I'm gone.
On a happier note, I figured out how to use Door Dash to get dinner and a milkshake tonight. I'm waiting on it now, and I am so excited for it. My only criteria was I needed a chocolate milkshake lol.
I do not understand how a country like the USA doesn’t have proper maternity leave or even decent options. It just blows my mind and isn’t right.
My last day of work will be January 14 2022. I’ll start my leave/EI (I max out at $638 a week which is gunna hurt financially but I’d never give the time up - We’ve been able to save some money) and I’ll return January 2nd 2023. DH will go off January 2 2023 until March 1 2023 under the same EI. We get a 6 weeks extension on EI when both partners take time off.
Me: 37 DH: 37 - Married 10.2015 ❤️ Canadian DX: Endometriosis - Stage 4, DOR, RPL
My request to take a full semester off goes in front of the school board Thursday. My principal is supportive, but im nervous because finding subs has been a nightmare this year (no surprise).
I took 12 weeks last time, most of which was paid thanks to me being part time + a new “leave bank” I got to dip into (donated days from other teachers). I technically got closer to 16 because of Christmas and spring break.
This time I’m requesting off the full semester, starting late Jan. I’d return in August. We can only take 12 weeks paid, but I don’t have anywhere near that saved up since I just used all my leave days in 2019/2020. It’ll be financially tight, but I’d much rather the time at home with baby.
@ninrms Good luck, and fingers crossed you’re able to get all the time off you want for maternity leave!
Does anyone know of a good travel maternity pillow? I found 1 that had really mixed reviews (Boppy Side Sleeper pregnancy pillow) so I’m nervous to try it, but after sleeping horribly last night at a hotel I usually sleep well at, I’m definitely needing something.
I'm so excited! I told my friend I wanted to buy a double BOB and I put it on my registry to get a discount on it, but she found a used one yesterday for $400! She picked it up and I'm headed to grab it from her this weekend. ❤❤❤
I got a Snoo off marketplace for $800 yesterday. I know it’s a lot but the resale will be $600-900 depending. Which means spending up to $200 on it instead of thousands. It sucks for now but will be worth it.
@kaf1788 since my youngest is still so little we don't have a lot we need, but marketplace is where it's at! Last year I got a brand new in the box lillebaby carrier for $50!
I’m all about Marketplace. I look daily for deals. So much better than spending full price. My boss at work had Child that was 1.5 years younger than Parker I passed some stuff to and now they are passing it back. Worked out so well. Lol
Me: 37 DH: 37 - Married 10.2015 ❤️ Canadian DX: Endometriosis - Stage 4, DOR, RPL
Love the Marketplace idea. Has everyone done local pickups or has shipping items worked? I don't have a lot of experience with the shipping side of it.
Funny story: So I had read that if you do pushups after your flu shot that you won't get a sore arm.
Yesterday: I get my blood drawn in my left arm for glucose test. I get flu shot in my right arm. The nurse leaves the room and I drop to the floor to try it. I wish this could have been on camera. I couldn't move my body 1" into a pushup. I tried 4 very pathetic push ups and laughed at myself. Worth a try with two sore arms and a heavy belly hanging down. hahahaha. I don't know why I thought it might be possible. I can hardly do push-ups regularly.
I took 12 weeks with my son and was paid partial short term disability once I used all of my pto, but it was 60% like some of you have said. This time since I don’t work full time I don’t have any protected or paid leave, but since I’ve been with my company for 5 years I’m able to keep my position. I’ll have whatever time I need until my doctor lets me go back. Probably 8 weeks, and I’ll probably ask her to give me a note to let me take the last couple of weeks pregnant off too, but I worked until 39 weeks with ds no problem! I only work a full shift in fridays and a half shift on Saturdays. So I’ll maintain that for the foreseeable future. I’ve saved what money I’ll need to spend on my portion of the bills for my leave so far.
@lexilougolden I'm dead XD @photographerwife I don't think I can adequately verbally convey the eye roll I just made. WTF, America.
It's looking like I'm going to need to start trolling marketplace for a bassinet. Our crib ship date has been delayed AGAIN (ordered in early August, pushed to September, then to 10/23, now to 11/6) and I am simultaneously angry and anxious. I knew global supply chain was broken but I didn't realize just how ridiculous it was.
@photographerwife Yes, it is sore. My measly push-ups didn't qualify apparently. lol
I'm in independent contractor so I get zero paid maternity leave. Definitely perks to my job but also big drawbacks. Thankfully MH has a great job + paid paternity leave for 2 months (that he can space out however we need).
@lexilougolden same situation here. No paid maternity leave for me since I do in-home daycare. My husband will be able to use vacation time and personal days, but I'm not sure how many he will get. We just found out he has to use 4 personal days by the end of December or he will lose them. I'm pretty bummed he can't just roll those over until the baby is due and use them then. Parental leave is a shitshow.
@chgilmore it really is shitty about the is maternity leave. And the sad part is, I had a better leave than a few of my friends. You still waiting on the mini crib? Can you cancel and reorder somewhere else? If I remember correctly we both have babyletto stuff and I was able to get mine through wayfair with fair shipping times.
@lexilougolden boo sore arm! I’d be In the same boat too! I have no upper body strength. but your story is so funny 😆
@modoodles that’s crap about your dhs personal days. That sounds like something mhs job would do. I think he’s going to have to use his vacation time for next year for paternity leave if he wants it paid. 🙄
@photographerwife yes this is the mini crib. my mom ordered it throufh 2Modern because the colors I wanted weren't available anywhere else (at the time). I'm hesitant to suggest starting over somewhere else in case that causes even more delays. Plus I've been going back and forth about a bassinet anyway...maybe I should just do it. Amazon is offering returns through Jan 31 2022 for stuff bought now through the end of the year so why not I guess? Ugh 😒
@chgilmore if you just want a bassinet as a backup in case the crib doesn't come in time you can try asking on your local Buy Nothing group or if you have a neighborhood parents' facebook group. People are always looking to get rid of stuff like that that's only for tiny babies! I got an Uppababy bassinet for free my first time around.
@chgilmore I would for sure consider having a back up plan or reordering! Especially if its delayed already going into the holidays. And with you being a ftm, who knows if you might deliver right after Christmas you know? We are not buying a bassinet, but are using a pack and play with a bassinet attachment before moving to the crib. If you have the space, that might be a good multi purpose solution too while you wait! They’re a bit bigger than a bassinet but not too bad.
@chgilmore you could △⃒⃘lways rent a Snoo. It’s $150 per month so you have something and if it’s worth it - awesome. If not, return as soon as your crib comes in
@chgilmore I ordered a babyletto rocker from 2Modern and the ship date keeps being pushed back. Though, right now both babyletto and Amazon have the product. So maybe 2 Modern is struggling to get their inventory for some reason. I got my babyletto crib from Amazon and it came in 4 days.
@lexilougolden@chgilmore we also got a babyletto dresser from Amazon and the crib from wayfair without problems. I think our crib maybe took a week? And I’m waiting for a rocker right now that I ordered last week. Expected tomorrow from wayfair.
I overslept this morning, so DH woke me up. I tried to tell him that I had to stay in bed and sleep when the baby sleeps. So he put his cold hand on my stomach and woke the baby up. We laughed, but I was so comfortable and sleepy lol.
@makingbacon Ugh, my husband had cold hands the other day and put them on my belly. I about screamed. lol. I'm jealous that you used the word comfortable when speaking about sleep.
@photographerwife@angelz429@kaf1788@lexilougolden Also thanks everyone re: bassinet ordering and the crib issue. After scouring the Facebook marketplace and talking with MH, we ended up ordering a baby delight beside me from Amazon that will arrive tomorrow. Free returns until end of January just in case we want to return it. It sounds like 2modern is the issue here, I'll tell my mom (she ordered the crib) and see if we can cancel and order elsewhere.
We hosted a dinner last night with a couple of friends. Felt so good to cook. Made homemade chicken cutlets, homemade pasta, family recipe tomato sauce, and a side salad. Delicious but I was on my feet for waaaaay too long so now I am going to sit for as long as possible today 😅
I had a small nesting urge - I’m kinda ready to start putting some stuff out/together to start envisioning a baby here. Put a diaper caddy together and emptied the top drawers of my dresser to put baby stuff in since he’ll be in our room for the first while/not setting up a nursery until 4ish months.
Me: 37 DH: 37 - Married 10.2015 ❤️ Canadian DX: Endometriosis - Stage 4, DOR, RPL
Re: Weekly randoms 10.25
AFM: I actually looked at the baby countdown part of the baby app I have. I usually just look at it for a vitamin reminder and to see how big baby is. I wasn't ready to realize I'm 15 weeks from my due date, and 12 weeks from when they wouldn't stop me from going into labor. So yeah, I'm over here silently freaking out.
for my son, I had 2 weeks paid off, and took 6 weeks unpaid (I was 24 and made 30k per year)
For my daughter, I was a resident and got 2 weeks maternity + my 3 weeks vacation + 1 week SL paid and took 5 weeks unpaid as a part time over 2 months (she was a 31 weeker in NICU after emergency c section)
this time, I get 12 weeks paid maternity, and can use up to 4 weeks of my saved sick/annual leave. I got permission to extend it part time over 2 months instead. So I’m doing 12 weeks off + 2 months of working 2.5 days per week.
I’m taking the full 12 weeks my company offers again. I get paid through my short term disability, so I’ll get 60% of my pay for 6 weeks and then I’ll be unpaid for the last 6 weeks. If I end up having a c-section, I’ll get 60% of my pay for 8 weeks. So it’s not great, but I’m glad we’re in a place financially that we can swing it.
I'm attempting to schedule all the travel I can for later in 3rd trimester to avoid traveling overnight right after getting back at 12 weeks. Holidays are messing it up a bit because my doctor usually grounds me from flying at 33 weeks, but I think we'll get everything done. I only took 6 weeks with DS1 and ended up traveling overnight for the first time when he was 9 weeks old. I'm trying to avoid as much early travel, outside of daytime travel, as I can. DH is going to have his hands full with 3 kids, and we don't have any family close who can help while I'm gone.
On a happier note, I figured out how to use Door Dash to get dinner and a milkshake tonight. I'm waiting on it now, and I am so excited for it. My only criteria was I needed a chocolate milkshake lol.
DX: Endometriosis - Stage 4, DOR, RPL
03.2016 - Natural BFP - MC 5w4d
04.2016 - Natural BFP - Chemical
10.2016 - IUI w/ Injections #1 = IUI Cancelled (cyst/no mature follicle)
11.2016 - IUI w/ Injections #2 = BFP, EDD 08.2017 - It's a BOY!
TTC #2 06.2019
08.2019 - IUI w/ Injections #1 = Chemical
09.2019 - IUI w/ Injections #2 = BFN
10.2019 - IUI w/ Injections #3 = BFN
01.2020 - IUI w/ Injections #4 = BFN
08.2020 - Natural BFP - MC 9w5d
11.2020 - IVF Retrieval - 3AB & 4BB
05.2021 - FET #1 = BFP, EDD 02.2022 - It's a BOY!
I took 12 weeks last time, most of which was paid thanks to me being part time + a new “leave bank” I got to dip into (donated days from other teachers). I technically got closer to 16 because of Christmas and spring break.
This time I’m requesting off the full semester, starting late Jan. I’d return in August. We can only take 12 weeks paid, but I don’t have anywhere near that saved up since I just used all my leave days in 2019/2020. It’ll be financially tight, but I’d much rather the time at home with baby.
Does anyone know of a good travel maternity pillow? I found 1 that had really mixed reviews (Boppy Side Sleeper pregnancy pillow) so I’m nervous to try it, but after sleeping horribly last night at a hotel I usually sleep well at, I’m definitely needing something.
@kaf1788 since my youngest is still so little we don't have a lot we need, but marketplace is where it's at! Last year I got a brand new in the box lillebaby carrier for $50!
DX: Endometriosis - Stage 4, DOR, RPL
03.2016 - Natural BFP - MC 5w4d
04.2016 - Natural BFP - Chemical
10.2016 - IUI w/ Injections #1 = IUI Cancelled (cyst/no mature follicle)
11.2016 - IUI w/ Injections #2 = BFP, EDD 08.2017 - It's a BOY!
TTC #2 06.2019
08.2019 - IUI w/ Injections #1 = Chemical
09.2019 - IUI w/ Injections #2 = BFN
10.2019 - IUI w/ Injections #3 = BFN
01.2020 - IUI w/ Injections #4 = BFN
08.2020 - Natural BFP - MC 9w5d
11.2020 - IVF Retrieval - 3AB & 4BB
05.2021 - FET #1 = BFP, EDD 02.2022 - It's a BOY!
@photographerwife I don't think I can adequately verbally convey the eye roll I just made. WTF, America.
It's looking like I'm going to need to start trolling marketplace for a bassinet. Our crib ship date has been delayed AGAIN (ordered in early August, pushed to September, then to 10/23, now to 11/6) and I am simultaneously angry and anxious. I knew global supply chain was broken but I didn't realize just how ridiculous it was.
but your story is so funny 😆
@modoodles that’s crap about your dhs personal days. That sounds like something mhs job would do. I think he’s going to have to use his vacation time for next year for paternity leave if he wants it paid. 🙄
I overslept this morning, so DH woke me up. I tried to tell him that I had to stay in bed and sleep when the baby sleeps. So he put his cold hand on my stomach and woke the baby up. We laughed, but I was so comfortable and sleepy lol.
@lexilougolden yay congrats on passing!!
@photographerwife @angelz429 @kaf1788 @lexilougolden Also thanks everyone re: bassinet ordering and the crib issue. After scouring the Facebook marketplace and talking with MH, we ended up ordering a baby delight beside me from Amazon that will arrive tomorrow. Free returns until end of January just in case we want to return it. It sounds like 2modern is the issue here, I'll tell my mom (she ordered the crib) and see if we can cancel and order elsewhere.
We hosted a dinner last night with a couple of friends. Felt so good to cook. Made homemade chicken cutlets, homemade pasta, family recipe tomato sauce, and a side salad. Delicious but I was on my feet for waaaaay too long so now I am going to sit for as long as possible today 😅
DX: Endometriosis - Stage 4, DOR, RPL
03.2016 - Natural BFP - MC 5w4d
04.2016 - Natural BFP - Chemical
10.2016 - IUI w/ Injections #1 = IUI Cancelled (cyst/no mature follicle)
11.2016 - IUI w/ Injections #2 = BFP, EDD 08.2017 - It's a BOY!
TTC #2 06.2019
08.2019 - IUI w/ Injections #1 = Chemical
09.2019 - IUI w/ Injections #2 = BFN
10.2019 - IUI w/ Injections #3 = BFN
01.2020 - IUI w/ Injections #4 = BFN
08.2020 - Natural BFP - MC 9w5d
11.2020 - IVF Retrieval - 3AB & 4BB
05.2021 - FET #1 = BFP, EDD 02.2022 - It's a BOY!