Hello! New here!

isabelherna

Hello to all!
I have been reading and visiting threads for a couple of days and I finally decided that I am ready to maybe become a part of this community, so I would like to introduce myself.
I am 38yo, single and ttc. I have been diagnosed with PCOS a long time ago, but I naively thought that when I really wanted to conceive it would happen despite this. I was in a long term relationship, I wanted to TTC, but he didn't, and wasn't very clear about it. He just kept putting it off, or changing his mind, and I just kept waiting. Long story short, when I decided that I want to have a baby, and that I am capable to do it alone, I started my journey with doctors and fertility tests. That's when I learned that it is close to impossible for me to conceive naturally, and they would suggest IVF and donnor egg even if I was with a partener. So, I am going to need a donnor egg (and sperm obv). Right now, I am at the researching stage, trying to figure out and understand this chaos in front of me (is it trully a chaos or is it in my head?), trying to have a positive attidute about the journey I am just starting and really really trying to keep the dark, self blaming thoughts out of my head.

Not sure if this the right way to go about it, but well that's where I'm at atm.
I do apologize for the long post, I promise I will get better with practice.
Also, I did a mistake and posted my introduction to the "New members" part of the forum at first, and then I realised my mistake.
Sorry if you have found both, but I don't know how to delete the other one.

Nice to meet you all, and good luck to everyone!

oranges226

Welcome! I am new as well  
did they say why they thought you would need a donor egg? Is it just because of the PCOS? 

Wishing you luck! 

oranges226

Sorry, messed up again. The format is confusing!

oranges226

Removing

isabelherna

Hello! Welcome! 
We are running some more tests atm, but from what I understand yes I need donor egg. I don't mind to be honest, I am just trying to be prepered for every possible scenario. 

[Deleted User]

Welcome!  I'm sorry you received such impending news.  Just also throwing it out there, since you were looking at donor egg and donor sperm, embryo adoption might be a viable option for you!  There are various programs with different guidelines, and many thousands of embryos available due to people having completed their families, but they still want those embryos to have a chance.  I would think it would be a much simpler overall (and more affordable, tbh) option, should you choose to move forward with ART, in one way or another.

http://www.embryosalive.com/
https://nrfa.org/embryo-adoption/

There was another amazing resource page I found through one of the clinics as well.  If I can find it again on my computer, I will post that, too.

isabelherna

Thank you so much for your suggestion! 

Tbh the thought didn't cross my mind, but you are right it sounds like it's what I need!
Do you know if in embryo donation, the reciepient learns about medical history of the donors? Nothing too personal if they are healthy people. (Sorry for the stupid question people) 

Thank you for the resources, you've given me more material to read and research upon! 

kiwi2628

In embryo adoption there are open adoptions, semi open and closed, just like with newborns. The traditional route is a closed adoption with just medical info, although more open adoptions are becoming more common (due to the benefit to the child). If you are interested in exploring EA, I suggest groups on F a c e b o o k as they have a ton of specific, non-biased info and can sometimes help you connect with Embryo donors. I don’t know as much, I just don’t a bit because we have looked into being embryo donors. 

skin999

I know where U are coming from Kiwi2628.....I used a donor as well and I was so concerned about knowing everything worth knowing about my donor. I had access to her file. The agency I used back in SA (South Africa) released some medical and family background information to me. That gave me some peace of mind....but if they dont here in the US (I am assuming U are in the US) then just pray and hope for the best.....
Good luck dear...

isabelherna

Thank you all for your support. I live in Spain, but I don't mind to travel for an ivf clinic somewhere in europe. I will try Facebook groups as well to see about embryo donations, but like skin999 said, in the end of the day all you can do is pray and hope for the best.