Why My Pregnant Self is Crying - June

[Deleted User]

<img alt="Why My Pregnant Self is Crying The Bump" src="https://external-content.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=https%3A%2F%2Fus.v-cdn.net%2F5020794%2Fuploads%2Feditor%2Fjz%2Faef3bhn3e4fl.gif&f=1&nofb=1">

[Deleted User]

My toddler fell asleep during quiet time on her brand new, grown up TWIN SIZE floorbed... Cue all the tears!  So proud.

makingbacon

@BusinessWife That is adorable. They always look so small in their new bed, too. 

Commercials make me cry. I watched an old one from last year of this tiny duck with a Disney book. He dropped the book in bad weather while flying north, but then met his hero, Donald Duck, at Disney the following spring.  

kmw611

@BusinessWife aww I’m glad she napped all on her own but I would totally cry too. We’re currently shopping for a twin to move DS2 into and I’m not really ready to see his tiny little self sleeping in that big ol bed. 

chgilmore

@BusinessWife AWWWWWWW
@makingbacon I have seen this commercial and I just straight up teared up just READING this lol

In the last 24 hours I have teared up because: my colleagues got me a slice of cake and a card for my birthday (tomorrow), I didn't know what I wanted to eat, I did know what I wanted to eat, DH and I had a really good hug, and the dog was cute.

lexilougolden

I saw a picture of brothers (10 years apart) and they looked so happy. I teared up. I don't cry very often so to even get teary like this always surprises me.

@BusinessWife What a big step! They look so little in a regular sized bed 

@chgilmore Choosing what to eat is hard! I feel ya.

@makingbacon I've never seen that commercial but it sounds adorable!

[Deleted User]

I cried, literally the instant I walked in the door and saw my friend's baby.  lol  And then again as I was leaving, talking about this baby,

*TW*
<div class=" Spoiler">and mentioning our losses. <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 I didn't get into much detail, but it was obviously enough that I got choked up.</div><p>
</p>

[Deleted User]

I can't be the only one weeping at the drop of a hat here...

This morning when the doctor handed me the u/s pic of our teeny tiny little bean and told me, "this is for your refrigerator," I immediately burst into tears!!! 😭😭😭

makingbacon

@BusinessWife You are not alone in your tears lol. I cleaned the fridge, which I do a lot for some reason while pregnant, and the almond milk spilled all over as I was putting it back. Like spilled from the top shelf down. I burst into tears because it hates me. My husband just hugged me and braced himself for all the feelings. I rarely cry when I’m not pregnant, so there’s always an adjustment period lol. 

photographerwife

@BusinessWife you’re not the only one! Currently getting teary about your u/s pic comment! 😂😅

chgilmore

@BusinessWife absolutely not alone! 

I bawled at the restaurant on my birthday when the cannoli with a candle came out (this was a Sicilian restaurant lol) because I didn't know what to wish for because "I already have everything I want". I also cried yesterday because I was listening to music from my middle school emo "phase" and realized that I wasn't in middle school anymore (I do not know why this felt so sad lmao).

[Deleted User]

@chgilmore Aw, that is so cute, not only that you got to have such a proper birthday dinner - but also that you cried when the dessert came out!

@makingbacon I think it's a nesting thing, cos I totally get you.  I'm sure I would have cried if I spilled something the whole way down like that, too!

kmw611

@makingbacon I absolutely would have cried about that even not pregnant. 

@BusinessWife I would have too! I’m getting tears at everyone else’s ultrasounds already I know I’m totally going to cry at my first US. I’ve never had an early US with a pregnancy so far but I think I’m going to request one this time for reassurance. 

chgilmore

Today I cried because:
1) a coworker asked me about what we're doing for father's day and I couldn't tell her that we're announcing to my FIL that day but I welled up just thinking about our announcement plan!
2) my IRL bff and I take dance classes at the same studio but we've been missing each other for like 3 months and tonight I got to see her dance again and she has grown in her dance so much, it was beautiful

[Deleted User]

Aww, those both sound so wonderful! @chgilmore I kinda wish we were announcing Father's Day, but I guess it's still a bit soon for us.  Plus, we don't actually have official plans to see FIL or grandpa (but maybe we should?) 😬

chgilmore

@BusinessWife I totally hear you! it is your timeline and you get to decide who you tell and when I figured since we told the rest of our parents, it was time to tell him, but he's also the only local one so he's the only one we're doing any kind of special thing for (telling my mom aligned with her birthday but that was kind of a happenstance kind of thing). I'm also very bad at keeping secrets lol

[Deleted User]

Oh that's cool. @chgilmore none of my family is local, so they will pretty much all get a card in the mail a little while down the road... With DD my mom was still around.  I think I was 8 weeks and FILs birthday was the following weekend, so when we were visiting MIL, we called my mom so they could both find out at once.  It was ... Awkward 😬 for a few reasons. Lol but I'll never forget how my mom called into my shower however many months later, even though she couldn't be there.  That meant so much to me. #whymypregnantselfiscrying hahaha

Anyway, since both girls were about a month apart, we told FIL with a onesie on his birthday both times, so now I feel kinda bad I didn't think to push for that for Father's Day this time. 😬 Whoops.  I'll figure something out lol

makingbacon

I cried today because it was raining, and I felt bad for my indoor plants. I watered them so they wouldn’t feel left out because they couldn’t feel the rain. 

lexilougolden

Tried to start writing my vows... and I lost it. I don't know how I'm going to read them out loud!

kmw611

@lexilougolden we did traditional vows and I don’t think I made it through one line without tears😂 no way I’d have made it through personal vows. You won’t be alone in the criers club!

I feel like I never have anything to add here because I’m not usually a pregnancy crier but I think I finally found a midwife and as soon as I got off the phone I burst into tears. I’m so relieved. We got on really well over the phone and have an consult appointment Monday to make sure we’re a good fit for each other. 

[Deleted User]

Oh, I'm so glad!  @fuscok88  I hope the midwife works out for you!

makingbacon

@fuscok88 That’s so exciting! I hope the midwife works out!

alexxajams

@fuscok88 I'm looking into having a midwife.. what were some key factors for you when searching for one ? Aside from being comfortable and being on the same page 

kmw611

@alexxajams are you looking for a midwife to birth at home or in the hospital? I am going for a home birth and I live in a town that only has a post office and nothing else so finding someone who would service my area was hard on its own. I loved the midwife I had with DS2 and went to her for recommendations since I’m outside her area now. For me, I need someone VBA2C friendly first and foremost. I won’t be induced prior to 40 weeks, preferably not at all so I needed someone who was with me on that. My first was born at 41+1 and the 2nd was 39+5 so I want someone who isn’t scared of going post dates. This midwife is comfortable going to 42+, comfortable with VBA2C, and comfortable following my lead. The only thing she said she requires is at least one ultrasound to verify my placenta isn’t over my scars or cervix, which is fine for me I’m pro-ultrasound. When we meet Monday I’ll get into what her transfer rate is, VBAC success rate, I prefer no cervical checks and it sounded like she was comfortable with that, What her stance is on the GBS test (we had a really hard time with my IV with DS2 so I really don’t want to go through that again, it threw off my labor groove) what kind of testing/labs she likes to do, I don’t agree with the 24 hour clock once waters are broken so I’ll discuss that with her, reasons for transferring, some midwives in my area carry some pain management options so we’ll discuss that but I labor really well as far as managing my own pain once I’m in “the zone” so I’m not super concerned with having anything available to me. I’ll ask about if she accepts insurance because some do and some don’t near me but no insurance really doesn’t matter to me I just need to know the cost to plan ahead. What I really want is someone who is going to follow my lead when I’m laboring, I tend to have long labors (36h for DS1, 34h for DS2), I love to move freely, I liked being able to get in and out of my birth pool/shower/bed, I also really don’t want to be touched until I’m in transition. I’ll probably hire a doula because my husband kind of forgot all the birth class tips for helping. He’s a great advocate for me but not a great hands on birth partner. If you’re going to homebirth and want a birth pool I would ask about borrowing from the midwife vs buying your own. We bought one for DS2 because we want more kids and more homebirths so it was more cost effective than renting. 

chgilmore

@alexxajams I'm going the midwife route as well. I have a nurse midwife team that is affiliated with a hospital (the birthing center inside of it is AWESOME). I intend to continue going to this team after birth for all my gynecology care because of how great they all are. I appreciate the setting and affiliation because 1) they work with OBs as well but are fully able to support births on their own with both minimal and standard interventions, 2) the setting has birthing jet tubs (!!!), 3) the hospital has a level 4 NICU (just in case), and 4) the midwives have one of the lowest C-section rates in the country. 

[Deleted User]

@alexxajams It can really vary a lot by state.  When I was getting ready to have my first, I think there was talk of or had maybe *just* opened a birthing center.  But it was a good 40 min away, and I had already found a MW team affiliated with the hospital 10 min from my house.  Despite hiring a doula, and the Ob having a comparitively low C-section rate (for a state with pretty high rates overall), I still ended up with a section, that luckily was otherwise safe and untraumatic.  So for my second, I was ineligible to use the birthing center anyway, due to VBAC concerns.  When I got to the hospital I had meconium in my waters (so I couldn't labor in the tub :( @chgilmore) and my covid test hadn't come back yet so no one offered me nitrous, even though my hospital had it available.  Sigh.  So take from that what you will!  Lol. I think some hospital based midwives are more or less medical ish than others, and some midwife affiliated Ob's are more or less supportive of inducing, or going to 42+ or other types of concerns you may have.  So I would really recommend meeting and interviewing the Ob as well, because ultimately they are the ones calling the shots.  You may like the MWs all very much, but if the Ob believes in growth scans at the end, inducing "big" babies, sections for breech etc. you may end up with a rude awakening when you find yourself in a non-standard situation approaching delivery, and the standard of care shifts gears on you.  I don't have experience personally working with home birth midwives, but I have several friends who have.  Haha in fact, I know two moms with the same midwife, for whom one baby was poorly positioned, she was transferred, they did a version and she delivered safely at the hospital, while our friend's baby came on his own, and they both share the same birthday! Lol  The home birthing community tends to be pretty amazing and tight knit, which is cool.

alexxajams

Thank you all so much for the insight! Looking for a dr is so overwhelming 😫  finally have my first appt next Tuesday. Hopefully it goes well. Also are there in Florida babies in here ? 😅