IUI / Infertility Questions trigger: mention of loss

jr130892

Hi Everyone:
Reaching out here in hopes of some advice.

I am 29 years old and husband is 36. We were TTC for a few months and ended up pregnant last October. Unfortunately, at the 10 week ultrasound- the fetus had no heartbeat. I had to get a D&C. We were devastated. Afterwards- we got a bunch of testing done— karyotyping, and I went to An RE for a workup.

Everything for me is in normal ranges (egg quantitiy/quality), ovulating regularly as well.

They did a sperm analysis on my husband. Initially his sperm motility and concentration was great (86% and 48 million concentration.) morphology was 0% and volume was low, about .5 instead of the expected 1.5 ML.

We recently did our first IUI last week. Pre wash sperm was at 46 Million but day 1 post wash; we only had 3 million. Day 2 post wash we had 4 million. Both days the volume was also still low (.4 and .5 so they said IUI sucess would be less.

The RE says these numbers indicate the need for IVF. Does anyone have any advice? I am very, very scared of needles and the IVF process. What has me confused is I’ve gotten pregnant before so I just wish it’d work this time and IVF sounds scary..

Thank you for any advice

[Deleted User]

I'm sorry you find yourself here, and for your loss.  That must have been devastating.

I am not sure if I'm the best person to respond as we found out my husband had zero (0) sperm in his ejaculate.  So iui was never an option for us; they were talking to us about ivf and donor sperm.

For us, if IUI had been an option, as you said in your case - you were able to conceive naturally - I would continue to exhaust all natural or less invasive options such as iui prior to going down the ivf road.  We never had those options available to us, so that alone was crushing.  I'm sure it must feel that way too, to hear the doctors say you might need to go straight to ivf.

There are a lot of factors to consider, and it's a decision that's personal to you.  The needles are the least of it, really.  If ivf is something you do choose to pursue, my experience is it's a bit like eating an elephant.  You do it a bite at a time, and suddenly you turn around and realise you did something that at first seemed so daunting.  But it is also kind of like a Pandora's box.  We are lucky enough that ivf worked for us, (and we are still hoping to conceive again by transferring the last of our remaining embryos), and it may work for you too.  I think you will know what's the right decision is for you when the time comes.  GL

jr130892

Thank you so much for your response @BusinessWife ! I guess i’m getting really impatient and just wanting to move forward. I’m glad to hear your IVF went successful and hope future luck to you as well!

For us- They said we have less than a 3% chance with IUI due to the sperm. A part of me wants to continue IUI but I think i’m stressing myself out so much. I also thought that If I had to do IVF: it may be great to get the stims and ER over now while I am working from home.

If you don’t mind me asking- was yours only male related or did you also have any other diagnosis? For us- it seems to me my husbands sperm only. Just devastated. A part of me feels we got pregnanct once naturally and can do it But the numbers tell me that was just luck. His sperm morphology is also 0% & I read that can also be a reason for miscarriage - so thats another reason I’m confused!

I feel like I always read about this and once it becomes real.... just feels so different!! I’m finding comfort in reading the posts on The Bump!

[Deleted User]

In our case as well, I never had a diagnosis.  But ivf is a whole new ballgame, and infertility treatment in general.  One thing you can start to do right away, regardless of what direction your path may take, is looking into fertility nutrition and vitamins for both of you!  My husband took a lot of vitamins specifically to help boost whatever sperm production he had, as well as Clomid for 3 months, to try and prepare for his retrieval.  So whether it's iui, or ivf, or trying naturally, things like that can't hurt - only help!  (<i>Please don't self-prescribe Clomid tho lol</i>)  For me, even though we only had an MFI dx, it helped me feel like I was doing my part to get myself as healthy as possible, too.

https://www.healthline.com/health/boost-male-fertility-sperm-count#Other-tips<div>
I'm having trouble finding the nifty table I had before that included recommended doses, but if you search you will see a lot of the same stuff, E, C, D, selenium, Zinc etc we did maca as well, this just reminded me.  One thing I remember though is to read the label carefully with vitamin E, because the source makes a difference.

<img src="https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/7v/rxpoyx18f9mm.jpg" alt="">
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Lisa3379

I'm right in the middle of my first IVF cycle, and I feel like we're both similar regarding pregnancy history and apprehension about the needles. 

*TW: loss, LC* 
I'm 39 years old, and have had 2 successful pregnancies, but then we had to terminate my third at 15 weeks (a year ago today, as it were) and then I had a MC at 8 weeks in November. So I was like, ok, we can conceive and it's worked before, but what's going on with the past two times? Because of my age, we had two choices: keep trying naturally, but my clock is really ticking here; or consult an RE and get help. After speaking with an RE, my anxiety about IVF was seriously relieved. The process just didn't sound as intense as I had worked it up to be in my mind, and I'm REALLY nervous with needles. We did genetic testing (we don't share a condition for which we're both carriers) and my husband didn't have any issues with his sperm, so I guess we could've tried IUI, but we just felt like we should really go for it and just do IVF, mostly to avoid wasted time with failed IUIs. 

Anyway, when it got to the needle part to prepare for the egg retrieval, again, it really wasn't all that bad at all. The needles are really tiny, and at least for me, they were all injected under the skin, not into the muscle. I had my husband do them all for me while I closed my eyes and clenched a pillow, haha. But honestly, it wasn't that bad. Get a heating pad/ice pack combo thing to help if you need it. I was a little sore after the week of 2-3 shots a night, but it really was not a big deal. The egg retrieval was super easy - I was under anesthesia, and it was over in like 20 minutes. Had no idea. Recovery was a breeze. Right now I'm in the middle of the transfer protocol. I'm doing a natural cycle frozen embryo transfer (oh - we had the embryos tested to make sure we weren't going to transfer one with abnormalities, so then they had to be frozen afterward while we waited for those results). I had one subcutaneous shot last night, and now I'm doing progesterone suppositories for awhile before and after transfer. The transfer process, from what I understand, seems way easy. 

Anyway. Everyone has different experiences, different protocols, etc, but I just figured I'd tell you my experience as someone that yeah, was super nervous about it before I really knew about it. Obviously the expense can be huge, and that's an important consideration, but the process is not a big deal. If anything, the biggest advantage for me is knowing that, for my situation, we're doing everything we can possibly do to make this happen, like, there is no further step that could've been taken instead. Hopefully that makes sense. Sorry for the novel, haha.