Trying to Get Pregnant

GTKY Friday 4/9

bows22bows22 member
edited April 2021 in Trying to Get Pregnant
This is not really a GTKY but I saw this in a group I’m in (and I’ll bet there are lurkers here who are in the group too so Hi!) and was shocked about the replies. Curious if there will be a divide here too!

When you send an email and put a “read receipt” on it - how do you pronounce that in your head?

Options - “red” receipt or “reed” receipt? 


Re: GTKY Friday 4/9

  • "Red" because it's past tense. Email has been read. 
  • Reed.

    But I also never use that feature because I absolutely hate when people use it on me.  Just because I read the email does not mean I have time to immediately reply or address the issue. I print out every email I need to do something on and it sometimes takes me awhile to actually get to it.  But I need to read the email to see if it is something that immediately needs to be done.  It is a struggle. haha!
    TTC History:
    Started dating DH 2006 . Married 2015

    TTC July 2015-November 2015
    BFP November 2015
    Baby boy born August 2016

    Oops BFP February 2021
    MMC March 2021

    Back on BC for a year to decide what we want to do.

    TTC Since March 2022
    MMC June 2022

    BFP September 2022 - Due June 2023!

    bows22[Deleted User]
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  • bows22bows22 member
    edited April 2021
    I say “reed” and it has never crossed my mind that it might be “red” - but “red” is what most people on the post commented! My mind was blown haha. I still think it’s reed though 😂
    [Deleted User]
  • @ReadyForaB I agree with you, I think when people use it a certain way it can be so rude. But with my job I have to contact clients other service providers to confirm certain information directly (for example the attorney). And if it’s the first time contacting them, or someone I don’t contact frequently, I will use the read receipt to make sure that they get the email and that it didn’t get caught in spam. But no way to people I communicate with regularly. 
    [Deleted User]ReadyForaB
  • @bows22 @ReadyForaB it's so passive aggressive IMO. However, if you're using it for a "I need you to read this important communication but no action required" type thing, I think that's ok. 
    [Deleted User]ReadyForaB
  • anniemarie887anniemarie887 member
    edited April 2021
    red until the day i die. lol. same justification as @pajamstagrams , past tense, you read the email.

    i send them randomly, there has to be a cause to send it, not on every email. for ex: if there is a process update i need to communicate to my team, i will often send it that way to make sure they were made aware and they do not need to (god forbid) reply all they got the email.

    i have a lot of strong opinions about email (maybe this will be UO?!), it's not a form of instant communication and people should not expect a response immediately. i will have someone email me at 4:45pm, and then at 9:30am the next day being like "i didn't see a response from you" and it makes me want to passive aggressively put them at the bottom of my to do list. if you need an immediate answer pick up the phone. that being said 3 business days and i haven't gotten a reply, i am wondering what is going on. 

    I Make My Own Rules GIFs - Get the best GIF on GIPHY

    edit b/c spelling and grammar are hard, promise i check them in emails just not on here or in text messages lol and @bows22 caught that i am clearly an idiot this morning.
    [Deleted User]
  • I always think "red" but I always decline the feature because it pisses me off. You'll know I got your email when I respond to it, bye.
  • @anniemarie887

     I don’t think you meant to tag me! we are on opposing sides

  • @anniemarie887 oh God I've been caught in some serious "reply-all storms".  Why do people think replying all "please remove me from this distribution" is appropriate??

    And totally agree about instant replies. You want instant, IM me or pick up the phone. But I will say that supporting a team 6 hrs ahead of me has it's advantages...I can write up an email at 4 pm and have an answer by the time I wake up!  

    Maybe UO but I actually hate phone calls. I get anxiety trying to phrase my thoughts coherently and God forbid having to leave a voicemail 🥴 plus, I've kinda been burned not having something in writing, so I generally prefer email/IM...Unless I need to talk about sensitive things that I don't want in writing 😬
    [Deleted User]
  • @anniemarie887 oh God I've been caught in some serious "reply-all storms".  Why do people think replying all "please remove me from this distribution" is appropriate??

    And totally agree about instant replies. You want instant, IM me or pick up the phone. But I will say that supporting a team 6 hrs ahead of me has it's advantages...I can write up an email at 4 pm and have an answer by the time I wake up!  

    Maybe UO but I actually hate phone calls. I get anxiety trying to phrase my thoughts coherently and God forbid having to leave a voicemail 🥴 plus, I've kinda been burned not having something in writing, so I generally prefer email/IM...Unless I need to talk about sensitive things that I don't want in writing 😬
    I HATE phone calls and unfortunately it's a large part of my job. I get so much anxiety from it. I actually prefer leaving voicemails because I don't have to have voice-on-voice contact and then my conscience is clear because I say, "Well, I called them..."

    You know what I hate? A follow up phone call within a half hour of receiving your email. Chill tf out. 
    chgilmore[Deleted User]acleverusername
  • I know it should be red...I get brain maintains that it is reed. 

    @fifilala516 @pajamstagrams I also hate phone calls, which is particularly difficult because being a pandemic therapist means that I have to make calls for sessions or check ins, so the calls are at least 30-60 minutes each. I get so nervous when it's quiet and I can't see their faces to know what they're thinking. 
  • edited April 2021
    I had a family member do this to me with a personal email that was super awkward.  She sent it twice. (And it had actually gone to junk in the first place.) So I pretended I didn't see it bc I just did not want to poke that nest.

    So after sending it twice and getting no response... SHE TEXTED ME THE EMAIL IN ITS ENTIRETY!!!!  Complete with a preface that she saw I hadn't replied to her email that she sent twice already! 🤦🤦🤦 Take a hint then maybe????  Bloody heck.

    Anywho, it's "reed," as in, "Did they read it?"

    ETA I can see how both could be correct, but to my ear, the two contrasting vowels is just harder than it needs to be.  EE - EE is easier in my head than EH - EE.
  • <b>Related question:</b> If you are going back and forth a bit via email (or text) and someone responds with something definitive that requires no further action on my part, as in, "Great, I will reach out to so and so and have her set that up."  Do you have to reply again with something like, "Thank you!  I'll look out for that invite."  Or do you prefer not clog up their inbox / blow up their phone, and just let that person just have the last word?  Does it depend on any particular factors?
  • @fifilala516
    I definitely had a coworker at my last job that would send an email, then minutes later walk over to her boss's office to ask if he saw her email. Basically an IRL read receipt lol

    So I've been thinking about this... I've probably said it both ways but more often as "reed" receipt. As in "I need to know that people are reading my emails". I think it really depends on the context for whether you say it in the present or past tense.

    Logic - when talking about them in general or as a topic, that's a "reed" receipt. The notification or whatever that you get back itself is a "red" receipt because it's telling you that the email was "red" by the recipient.

    Therefore, both are correct.

    I polled DH and he said "reed" and agreed with my logic above for it being a "reed" and "red" receipt.
    *TW* History:
    Me: 34 DH: 35 | Together since 2007 | Married July 2016

    TTC #1 since 7.2017
    Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies

    IUI #1-3 all BFN
    IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys
    FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name"
    RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET
    FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer
    2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle
    Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks
    TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20

    Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21
    Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation
    Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal
    Bloodwork | 10.21.21 high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies
    BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22 B) | biopsy provided same effect as endometrial scratch; added supplemental progesterone and estrogen, prednisone, levothyroxine, and MTX to maintain pregnancy
    DS born 7.19.22 after induction

    TTC #2 begins in 2023
    Consultation with RI | TBD
    [Deleted User]
  • oh god @pajamstagrams we had an epic one about 2 years ago - i'm talking company wide distribution list to 100k+ people. i had to create a rule in outlook to mass delete them as they came in, it took a solid week for the "please remove me" and "for the love of god responding please remove me won't work" emails to stop. it was easily over 1000 of them. almost crashed our server apparently. i get ptsd thinking about it. 

    @fifilala516 so i like calls - if an email goes back and forth like 4x and we're still not squared away i'm picking up the phone. that being said, emails easily deserve a 24 hr turn around. so i agree, chill. 

    @BusinessWife YIKES personal is next level, read recpts for business only. also as someone who suffers in a constant state of email purgatory please don't send back "Great, thanks!" i got it. 

    @inthewoods23 please tell me your boss told that human to stop. 
    [Deleted User]acleverusername
  • boymama2018boymama2018 member
    edited April 2021
    Am I the only one who is guilty of clicking "do not send response" when someone attaches a "Reed Receipt" to something not urgent?  :D Also, I always read it as "Read Receipt", hehe.
    [Deleted User]chgilmoreanniemarie887inthewoods23
  • Another “red” receipt here, as the purpose of adding that feature is so that you know whether your email has been read. I use this sparingly, as it is annoying AF and should be reserved for important things only. Same with <Urgent> in the subject line or the red exclamation point. 
  • That is reassuring. @anniemarie887 In the past I always felt, "But I need to make sure that I <i>THANK THEM</i>." until DH said to me, "you know you don't always have to have the last word." 😳 And I was like<div><img src="" alt="">
    Because I really didn't see it like that.  Now it feels very uncomfortable, but a super high up just emailed me back, and I had to super duper fight the urge to THANK HER!!!! 😫😫😫 I really wanted to, but deep down inside I knew it was better to just let it lie.  Why do I have no chill?
    <img src="" alt="">
  • haha @BusinessWife think of this way - she was just gonna delete that thank you, so you saved the email from it's sad deleted box fate! 
    [Deleted User]acleverusername
  • @BusinessWife @anniemarie887 I think there is a fine line with the “thank you” email because sometimes I feel the need to acknowledge the subject is settled? So @BusinessWife in your example, if my boss sent me an email like you mentioned, I wouldn’t say anything back. But if a staff accountant said that to me I’d want to say thank you meaning “yes, I confirm that this is what you need to do” but maybe it’s just been drilled into my head too much that Gen Zers need reassurance like that. 

    [Deleted User]
  • @bows22 yes, perfect comparison.  As a boss, I agree that sometimes it is important to confirm, say Yes, Go ahead, etc. just to give that finality to it.  But the fact that she is so ridiculously high up on the totem pole from me, and I'm lucky even to be graced with a reply(!) -- really, she is wonderful though, I've met her a few times, and she is very close with my original hiring manager -- the last thing a lowly pleb like me wants to do is take up too much of her time, ...or make her do any unecessary clicks. 😬 Lol
  • i don't think she would be offended by it @BusinessWife !! 
    [Deleted User]
  • I'm in the "reed" camp, as per @BusinessWife's explanation. 

    Also, this is how I have the final word:

    But also, 95% of my communication is over IM (Slack). Anyone else? 
    TTC History
    Me: 38, MH: 37 | Met 02/2009 | Started Dating 08/2017 | Married 02/02/2020
    TTC #1 since 02/2020
    2009 | Dx PCOS; likely a misdiagnosis
    07/14/20 | Dx Hashimoto's Thyroditis
    07/21/20 | 1st RE appointment
    07/2120 - 08/20/20 | so much testing; no signs of PCOS
    08/20/20 | Dx Unexplained; AMA
    09/08/20 | IUI #1 Clomid + Trigger + Prometrium | BFN
    09/30/20 | Urology consult; more testing required
    10/2020 | Clomid + OPK + TI + Prometrium | BFN
    10/26/2020 | Starting 2nd IUI cycle, with Letrazole and with a new RE / different clinic
    11/03/2020 | New Dx "poor egg quality"; IUI cancelled in favor of Trigger + TI + Prometrium | BFN
    11/26/2020 | Combo IUI (Clomid + Menopur) + Trigger + Prometrium | BFN
    12/20/2020 | Combo IUI (Clomid + Gonal-F) + Trigger | IUI Cancelled due to thin lining; TI only | BFN
    01/14/2021 | Combo IUI (Letrazole + Menopur) + Trigger | BFN
    02/06/2021 | Switched to a new RE (TEW) ; trying naturally until we complete additional testing 
    03/14/2021 | Hybrid Double IUI, with Zymot (Letrazole, Gonal-F) + Trigger + Endometrin | Ovulated 4 mature eggs but still a BFN ☹️
    04/07/2021 | Natural cycle while we regroup | BFN
    04/09/2021 | Employer announces fertility benefits starting 05/01/2021! | Search for a new doctor who accepts insurance
    05/10/2021 | New RE consult & plan for IVF
    05/13/2021 | Mid-luteal IVF cycle #1 interrupted; had to get cancer genetic screening done to make sure I didn't have the same SDHA gene mutation as MH. 
    06/10/2021 | Aygestin priming IVF cycle #1; opted to Cx after 9 days of stims since only 5-6/12 follicles responded
    07/26/2021 | Attempt #2 at IVF cycle #1 (mid-luteal start): 8 retrieved, 8 MII, 6 fert (1 PN3), 3 Day 5 & 6 blasts: 3AA, 3AA, 6AB; 3 euploid
    08/09/2021 | Rest cycle / unmedicated TTC | Shockingly, a BFP! EDD: 5/25/202 | CP at 4w4d
    09/23/2021 | IVF cycle #2 (mid-luteal start): 14 retrieved, 13 MII, 11 fert, 5 Day 5 & 6 blasts: 2 x 3AA, 2 x 3AB, 3BB; 2 euploid
    11/12/2021 | IVF cycle #3 (mid-luteal start): cancelled due to ovaries being on vacation
    12/20/2021 | Rest cycle / unmedicated TTC + Pregmune Immunology Testing; BFN
    01/22/2022 | Rest cycle / unmedicated TTC + understanding uncovered immunological issues; BFN
    02/18/2022 | Mock transfer cycle! ERA, ReceptivaDx, EMMA/ALICE; start Prednisone to address NK activity
    03/16/2022 | Final, "Hail Mary" super-ovulation + TI cycle before FET; BFP! EDD: 12/21/2022 | MMC 05/08/2022
    05/20/2022 | D&C; recovering... 
    06/21/2022 | Trying naturally until October 2022
    07/21/2022 | BFP! EDD 04/02/2023

    [Deleted User]
  • @acleverusername we use Microsoft Teams, and I HATE the chat function as a replacement for email. I keep missing things. We just started using it during the pandemic but our other office has been using it for awhile, so they are really good about using it and I’ll read something and can’t reply immediately and then just totally forget. If it’s in my email then that’s my “to do” list. So basically I only like chat if someone needs to tell me something and nothing is required on my part. 
    [Deleted User]chgilmoreanniemarie887
  • @bows22 YES! IM/chat is like what do you want for lunch? How’s it going? But same thoughts, I will lose track of a to do over it. 
  • @bows22 @anniemarie887 oh no, I use teams chat for everything! How else do you get a hold of someone whose calendar 100% packed and double booked with meetings? Can't call them, and we have already established emails aren't for instant stuff🤷‍♀️ plus it's again nice to have the conversation history for documentation.  
  • bows22bows22 member
    edited April 2021
    @pajamstagrams it probably depends on the industry. Our calendars more filled with client site visits versus meetings, but are still expected to be available by phone (not immediately but whenever you can step away) if someone needs us. If I could Teams chat with clients I’d probably use it more!

    Oh man now I’m wondering if some clients would reply faster if I could use Teams. I did try with one client and they could message me but I couldn’t reply. Maybe it’s a setting we have internally that could be changed. 
  • @pajamstagrams phone! Leave a voicemail. Old school style. LOL. Like @bows22 I can’t do any kind of chat with clients, it’s purely internal. And I work mostly client facing. 
    [Deleted User]
  • @anniemarie887 we only recently got voicemail on teams so I'm not used to it. (They took away our desk phones years ago) Also, I'm awkward AF on voicemail 🙈
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