Weekly Randoms 3/17

jackie_dunny

Since yesterday was National Panda Day 

marbellie

Work has been kicking my ass lately. I didn't get a new email between 8-8:30pm tonight, so I thought my email system had crashed. I sent myself a test email from my phone to double check 🤣

sliztee

marbellie said:

Work has been kicking my ass lately. I didn't get a new email between 8-8:30pm tonight, so I thought my email system had crashed. I sent myself a test email from my phone to double check 🤣

Do you work outside of the typical 9-5? 

marbellie

sliztee said:

marbellie said:

Work has been kicking my ass lately. I didn't get a new email between 8-8:30pm tonight, so I thought my email system had crashed. I sent myself a test email from my phone to double check 🤣

Do you work outside of the typical 9-5? 

Technically no, I start the day at 8am, but am lucky if I can log off by 8pm. Every day for the last month it's been more like 2 or 3am (sigh) with no days off. I do corporate law deals so I have a few closings coming up next week... Just trying to grit my teeth and bear it.

If not for the fantastic (for USA) maternity leave of 6 months I would've thrown in the towel already lol.

teamginger13

@marbellie you get 6 months mat leave!?! My company doesn't even have a mat leave policy (basically just FMLA). My last pregnancy I negotiated with them to give me 8 weeks paid which they agreed to but it wasn't easy and I ended up having to use part of my PTO to cover it.

sliztee

marbellie said:

sliztee said:

marbellie said:

Work has been kicking my ass lately. I didn't get a new email between 8-8:30pm tonight, so I thought my email system had crashed. I sent myself a test email from my phone to double check 🤣

Do you work outside of the typical 9-5? 

Technically no, I start the day at 8am, but am lucky if I can log off by 8pm. Every day for the last month it's been more like 2 or 3am (sigh) with no days off. I do corporate law deals so I have a few closings coming up next week... Just trying to grit my teeth and bear it.

If not for the fantastic (for USA) maternity leave of 6 months I would've thrown in the towel already lol.

Ha! Americans don’t get 6 months of leave. The maximum under FMLA (unpaid leave, unless you have PTO) is 12 weeks, and that’s only if you meet the requirements. 

Anyway, I bet corporate law is brutal. Try to take it easy, if you can! Maybe schedule yourself 8-5 after these few deals close? 

[Deleted User]

*lurking*
My company has 16 weeks paid, up to 24 weeks unpaid for maternity leave.  In the USA, it is up to the company's discretion; they may choose to offer more than the minimum FMLA.  Mine does. 🤷

KNB1027

My company only has FMLA so I have to save up my PTO and sick leave. It is a little stressful because some mornings I feel awful but I don't want to miss a day now since it would be one less when I am out for maternity leave. 

marbellie

Argh! I could make an entire burn book with how mad it makes me when people get no leave. I know people who had to work days after birth (so many people can't afford to go unpaid and also don't get paid vacation time) and it really sucks. I'm really grateful for my firm's benefits, but I also hate that it makes a gift of what should be a human right. 

marbellie

@slitzee thanks, I'm hoping to be able to have just 9/10 hour days again soon (the best I could swing for in my type of law) 🤞🏽

doodleoodle

I’m in the US and with my first, when I was working, I got 3 months paid maternity leave (separate from any other pto I had accumulated) and then the additional 12 weeks unpaid FMLA. Since I’ve left, I’ve heard from old friends that are still there that they now offer 6 months paid maternity leave.

amostpeculiarmlle

@doodleoodle That's amazing! I'm glad there are some US companies giving decent leave! My company had no maternity leave policy until just a couple years ago and now it's the standard 12 weeks FMLA and after that you have to use sick/PTO time. I wish it were more, but I also feel I can't complain.

mkp0903

I’m technically an independent contractor, and my employer/group provides a short term disability plan that gives me partial pay for 8 weeks (yay for repeat c/s, otherwise just 6). Good thing is I can take however much time off I want. I took 24 weeks off with me first, and then worked part time for a month. Bad thing is that I don’t get pto or sick leave, so I have to save the money for however much time off. This time it probably won’t be as long b/c my husband is going back to school while he’s still working, so we’ll have tuition and other stuff to pay too, ugh. Haven’t really decided. He gets 6 weeks paid off for paternity leave since he works remotely for a Canadian company. So many decisions...seems so far away but it sneaks up on you. 

marbellie

@mkp0903 for DS, MH was working for himself and took 4 months off (it was an easy call to make since I'm the breadwinner and we both just wanted to soak up as much family time as possible). It was really amazing.

This time around he got hired by a client and will likely have 8 weeks leave... Hopefully.

mkp0903

@marbellie 4 months is awesome! I’m the breadwinner too, so it’s a lot of pressure to actually work more pregnant and save up as much as possible. 8 weeks will still be great. The timing might work out that he might get a couple of extra tacked on the end b/c his office is closed from Christmas through the end of the year. I really hope so!

teamginger13

@mkp0903 I was thinking the same thing regarding the holidays. My DH company closes for 2 weeks at the end of December which will be toward the end of mat leave so that will be nice! Plus a few days around Thanksgiving. It’s always easier with 2 people and that extra support. 

jackie_dunny

I told my boss today. I’m only 7 weeks but since I work with chemicals I wanted him to know sooner rather than later in case there were any precautions I had to take (there isn't, I’m safe). Plus with how nauseous I am, I wanted permission to be able to run off to the bathroom lol he was so nice about it and it went a lot better than I thought it was going to! I was nervous because I only started in early February but he was so chill about it so phew. Whole load off my shoulders 😪 I won’t be telling anyone else until after 12 weeks though 

Starynightsky24

This is my 4th baby, and 4th time using TB and I’ve never seen the boards so dead 😳. What happened???? 

usedtobeknottie

@jackie_dunny congrats on the big step of sharing your news! Glad your boss was so understanding. It’s got to feel good to have one else worry. 

I’ve been thinking of telling mine after my ultrasound Friday too... actually my hubby asked me to. I could not slow my anxiety last week with my work load and it’s bordering on dangerous levels of stress right now. Hopefully mine is as understanding as yours! 

jackie_dunny

@Starynightsky24 TB doesn’t really “advertise” their community boards anymore. They have a very confusing way of even trying to find them. So I think the majority of people who use the forum only do so because they’ve seen it before and know it exists, did some TB sleuthing, or have used them before. It’s a shame but at the same time makes for tighter knit communities 

sthlm_21

@jackie_dunny that sounds awesome. I too work with stuff that are potentially carcinogenic, like today. I try to be very careful. My manager is a very nice guy. But having an underperforming staff for 2 years might disappoint him. 
@usedtobeknottie I have my u/s scheduled for Friday too I’ll be 8w+2 days though. Hoping to break the news at workplace depending on how the scan goes. 

I’ve been sick at home since I discovered I was pregnant. First day back at workplace, everything smells like garlic 😭 so nauseating. I had to keep chewing a watermelon flavored gum under my mask to save myself from my breathe. 😩

marbellie

I called my OBGYN to schedule my 8 week appt, but when I told the person on the phone (receptionist?) she kind of freaked out that my last period was February 8th and that I wanted to wait a month. She insists that I come for an ultrasound April 5th when I'll be 8 months based on LMP. I told her that I'll be 6+6 that day, but I stopped fighting. Meh, hopefully we'll see something reassuring anyways.

It's lucky that I understand my cycle and ovulation, because otherwise I would show up to that appt and get freaked out about the small size of Baby. 

cyanne12

@marbellie Wow! My last was Feb. 2 and my appointment is April 14. They didn’t seem concerned about getting me in at 8 weeks.

marbellie

campbellcobb said:

@marbellie Wow! My last was Feb. 2 and my appointment is April 14. They didn’t seem concerned about getting me in at 8 weeks.

Did they ask you for your cycle length? Mine didn't and I told her that my cycles were super long while breastfeeding (still no change on her stance though). I feel like she must be new.

 I'm waffling between calling back to push it back a week or keeping the appt 🤦🏾‍♀️ on the one hand, would be great to see the baby, but on the other hand the baby will be but a tiny abstract one lol

cyanne12

@marbellie No. The receptionist I spoke to seemed like she barely had time for me. I was kind of disappointed. 

I didn’t really ask her any questions. She seemed like she just wanted to set up the appointment and be done. 

Starynightsky24

@jackie_dunny that makes sense. It did take me a bit to find it this time. So sad! 
 

doodleoodle

@campbellcobb that’s so frustrating! A similar thing happened to me before but, the opposite. I ended up not getting an ultrasound until 12 weeks because the receptionist didn’t understand you add two weeks from the date of conception lol

marbellie

@campbellcobb well that's annoying! And now hearing @doodleoodle I'm now realizing that it's possible to get truly clueless people, even despite where they work 🤦🏾‍♀️ I'm going to call back and push mine 1 week.

tmk2021

Does anyone know if it’s normal for pregnancy tests to fade at some point? I took them every other day until last Sunday. Then I stopped and decided to take one this morning, just because I had some cramping last night and felt worried. No blood or anything, but it’s definitely lighter than the one I took 9 days ago. That one, the test line was a tad darker than the control line. This one, the opposite. So it’s definitely lighter 😬

jenniferjoy37

@Starynightsky24 I’ve noticed that too! I’m on baby #3 and it takes me AGES to find the community board anymore...it kinda stinks. I’ve found some amazing mom friends on TB and I want to continue that with baby #3!

artsiefartsie

@tmk2021 how far along are you? I wouldn't worry about it because tests aren't good indicators of actual amounts of hcg. You can also get a hook effect once your hcg gets super high and the tests don't know how to read it and they'll be lighter. 

tmk2021

@artsiefartsie I’m 7w2d. I hope you’re right, it makes me so nervous 

artsiefartsie

@tmk2021 100% at 7weeks your hcg is going to be way too high for urine tests to accurately be picking it up.  Those tests are only meant to pick up about 25 mlU/mL and at 7 weeks you are in the tens of thousands or hundreds of thousands. It will cause false negatives at that level. I know it is easier said than done,  but don't poas anymore lol It will only drive you nuts and isn't indicative of anything this far out ❤❤

KNB1027

@jackie_dunny glad your boss was supportive! I told my direct supervisor as soon as I found out since she knew I was doing fertility treatments. I am going to wait to tell HR until the second trimester.

@marbellie I would expect that receptionists at an OB would know how it works but oh well glad you track and will know to expect a slightly smaller blob on the ultrasound. I had to explain to the receptionist that I had an exact date of conception and couldn't tell her when my LMP was since I was doing IVF - she too seemed a little confused  

tmk2021

@artsiefartsie okay, I’m putting the tests away right now lol