When/how to stop worrying? (3 HCG tests in)

wishingforsnow

Hey all - this is our first pregnancy after trying for 2 years and change, 4th fertility treatment cycle and first since the start of the pandemic. 

I'm feeling so excited and blessed to be pregnant, but the constant anxiety over whether "Baby Snow" is doing well is driving me nuts! Having trouble focusing on anything else! Have received 3 good HCG results over past 6 days, but not sure how to deal with myself until after the heartbeat scan in 3 weeks.

Tips/tricks?? 

madiirosee

I totally feel this. Just got my first hcg back and it’s looking good. 38,231 at 6w2d. My US is scheduled for next week, and with my last pregnancy ending as a missed miscarriage I’m so so nervous. I’ve been listening to podcasts, cooking, baking and napping honestly to get my mind off of it! I don’t think us mommas ever stop worrying though. Good luck to you ❤️

wishingforsnow

Yes podcasts and cooking/baking sound like great ideas. I need a new podcast!!

I honestly have a terribly busy job so I should probably just get back to focusing on that, will definitely get my mind off of things. Wonder if I just need a routine where I allow myself like an hour of thinking/reading about all this stuff per day, and then move on!

Good luck to you too @madiirosee

kitandcat

I have been a bit of a wreck with this! I had two losses in 2020 and can’t stop thinking about losing this baby. Reading definitely helps me. Journaling really helps - just to get it out of my head and on paper helps me process it (and really understand when I’m being unrealistic) and writing down the positive thoughts I want to focus on helps me reset myself later in the day when I’m anxious. Yoga and meditation are amazing. Yoga with Adriene is my favorite and it feels like every single practice I do, she says something that relates perfectly to what I’m going through. It’s hard to find time for all of that though, or any of it, especially now that I’m so sick all the time and feel like I can’t do anything. But thank you for posting this so I could share these tips and remind myself of what helps and what works and what I should be doing! 

chindimples04

i have a TTC TikTok account where I have been documenting my journey. 

noprobalo

Just got a call that my levels at 5w3d were 29,800. I guess that's good? First time pregnancy, and I don't have an OB appointment yet. This was just from my primary care doctor. Now hopefully the novelty can start to wear off and I can focus on other things.

momofmiracles31889

Waiting for the heartbeat ultrasound is just so hard! For me with my pregnancy with my son after my 3 losses, there were so many milestones that added a new layer of relief and lessened the anxiety (first heartbeat, 8 week heartbeat, healthy 12 week scan, healthy anatomy scan, feeling kicks and then hitting the point he could be born alive). So although I would say I struggled with some level of anxiety the whole time it got less consuming for sure! I feel a LITTLE less anxious this time now that I’ve had a live birth BUT with my pregnancy record being 1/4 so far the fears are still there for sure. So eager to see the heartbeat next week. 

Anyway one thing that has always helped me is talking about the baby being a part of our family as if it’s definitely going to happen (even though I know it’s not guaranteed). Praying and certain Bible verses and quotes help me too. Also I would always buy something early on for the baby to see as a tangible hopeful reminder. Usually it was an outfit but this time I actually was getting a stuffed dinosaur from IKEA for each of my two sons while there and I had just found out I was pregnant and got one for the baby too!  Might sound silly but it helps me hold onto hope  

demimondaine

I tested until I had a dye stealer and then stopped. I still don't really have many symptoms - 5+4 - so I'm just waiting for my first ultrasound on Monday, hoping we can see something! My appt is with radiology, not my OB - do you think they will tell me anything? I hope I can at least get a pic if everything looks ok!

tingsmom

@demimondaine Most of my US always happen with radiology.  Technically, I do not think they are supposed to tell you anything but I always try to butter them up to get more information.  Also, I just think it's best to have a conversations with someone who is doing a transvaginal US on you.  My tech this week told me the heartbeat and the how the baby was measuring.  Also indicated they could see the blood, they didn't tell me about the ovarian cysts but did tell me my bleeding was likely a SCH.  I hope it goes well for you on Monday! 

demimondaine

@tingsmom I never one with radiology last time, only for non-pregnancy things. In a way it may be better, because last time I was the one that pointed out my SCH to my OB!!! Do you know what she said?? "Oh the sac just isn't filling the uterus yet" (8+2) 

lovemygirls-

I understand. I'm also having a lot of anxiety about weather baby is okay and I have this irrational fear that when I go for my ultrasound on the 8th that there's not going to be anything there😢
I had a miscarriage in Nov and a chemical pregnancy in Dec, and to make matters worse, I'm usually very sick by now and am only getting waves here and there. But I have been taking cheapie dip strips every morning and it helps to relieve my anxiety a bit. I also remind myself that "for today, I am pregnant" and that also kind of brings some light to the situation.

kitandcat

My therapist gave me really good advice this week, to ask myself “What is real right now?” And everyday I’ve been telling myself, Right now, I am pregnant. This baby is real right now and I feel joy and hope and those happy emotions are real! It’s been helping me to focus on what feels good instead of all of my stress and anxiety. 

vampirina

For me, I've almost taken the opposite of hope approach. I can't hold onto hope only to be let down, so instead I tell myself that I'm doing everything right, and the rest is out of my control. This pregnancy will turn into a baby or it won't, but either way I will move forward and my family will move forward.  This way I know I can focus on what I can control - eating healthy foods, abstaining from alcohol,  etc. And not what I can't.