GTKY Monday 02/15

mindyb2019

Heyy were all human and these moments happen. Whats the most awkward or embarrassing thing that has ever happened to you? Come on let's here it LOL

mindyb2019

Ok.. well apparently NO ONE has has ever had any awkward or embarrassing moments in their life 😆🤣

akoros

@mindyb2019 I think it's more picking the *most* embarrassing thing that's the struggle! But I'll give it a shot...

When I get very drunk I tend to sleep walk. The running theory is that my body knows it needs to use the bathroom, so tries to get there on its own even though my mind hasn't woken up yet. If I'm at home it's not a big deal, as my body can find its way based on memory. The issue happens if I'm not at home (i.e. sleeping at a friend's house or in a hotel). It's actually kind of scary, as I seem to have no problem opening up doors, but there was a time when a group of us was staying at a friend's boyfriend's house after a wedding when my friend woke to find me fiddling with a window. When she asked me what I was doing, I got very frustrated and exasperatedly told her that I was, "looking for a new government!" After laughing she asked if I needed to go to the bathroom (the answer was yes) and led me there. 

_orchid_

Lol @mindyb2019 my entire life is a series of embarrassing/awkward moments.

_orchid_

One of the worst that comes to mind is getting birth control from PP in the early 2000s.

Spoiler bc kinda long

Prior to being diagnosed with hypothyroidism at 19 my periods were terrible- heavy, long, vomiting days 1-3, super fatigued to the point I couldn't get it of bed, etc. At 15 I'd heard going on the pill helped with symptoms, but my mom wouldn't take me to see a Dr bc she didn't want me on the pill bc I'd just be a "giant slut" and sleep around (yeah, I have no relationship with her anymore bc of abuse in my childhood). She told me if I wanted the pill bad enough I'd have to get myself to PP (while watching me be sick every 40 days). 

Well, I finally was able to get myself there at 17. I had to do a long risk assessment interview prior to being examined to see if they needed to check for STDs also. Questions were general and included how many sexual partners, how often I engage in group sex, etc (embarrassing enough for a virgin to answer). 

What made this mortifying? The person doing my risk assessment was my SUNDAY SCHOOL TEACHER. I vaguely thought she looked familiar, and then she saw my name and was like "OMG! How are you? My daughter still talks about how much fun you guys had in class together! So long since I've seen you! Have you ever participated in an orgy?" 😳😐😢

mindyb2019

@_orchid_ OMG can u say ackward lol that would be really embarrassing and uncomfortable. Especially talking about group sex and orgys etc LOL 

@akoros your story made me laugh. Looking for a new government 😆🤣 

Here's my embarrassing/ackward story. Sorry it's long too! 

A long time ago when I was 19-20 years old, I worked at a department store called Zellers(They were replaced with Target). I worked at the front tills as a cashier and one day I showed up to work for my usual day shift and I was wearing a pair of my black work pants that I have worn for years. It had a zipper in the back on the butt area. Anyways, halfway into my shift im helping the customers and ringing there merchandise through the cash register and then all of a sudsen I felt this POP and it felt really drafty. Anyways, my zipper on my butt decided to break and rip open. So there i am standing at the front cashier and I was wearing thong underwear that day and my ass cheeks are hanging out cause my pants are hanging open 😆🤣 I finished helping the customer and I grabbed the back of my pants and waddled out and called my boss over and I told her what happened and she's like whattt!?? Let's see lol so I turn around and show her my butt ( My boss was like a second mom to me. We were close and still talk to this day) Anyways she BURSTS into laughter 😆🤣 she thinks its the funniest thing. I felt soo embarrassed as my butt is hanging out and I dont have any other pants. I didnt gave a car either and would have had to walk home for a bit to change. So my boss comes up with this idea."Well how about we staple your pants shut in the back?" I'm like ok. At the time I thought it was genius but then after she stapled my whole pants shut.. I said wait!! " how the hell am I gonna get my pants off to go to the bathroom?" LOL she's like oh shit!! 😆 Long story short.. I had to walk like 25 mins in the freezing cold in a snow storm with broken pants to go home to change and come back. Now that I'm in my 30s I laugh my ass off about this story. LOL 

I have sooo many ackward stories I could tell but there you go thats one of them. 
 
 

_orchid_

@mindyb2019 LOL. Your poor butt in the snow!! I love that your boss stapled them shut!! 😂

I worked in retail, waitressing, bartending, and then in the public library for about 15 years straight, and have so many crazy stories from working with the public. I have one of those faces that just invites conversations and an generally pretty reserved around people I don't know so people always just assume quiet = boring, trustworthy and tell me crazy sh!t. 

ramzlau

@akoros That is so funny that you were looking for a new government. And apparently I speak fluent in a second language when I am drunk. 

@_orchid_ As a teenager that would have been mortifying. 

@mindyb2019 OMG I laughed so hard I almost woke DD up. 

I don’t know what my most embarrassing moment would be. I am such a clutz and always trying to do multiple things at the same time, so I feel like I have so many stories but not ones that are funny, they are more like sad/tragic embarrassing. 

akoros

@ramzlau I'm not sure if I'm fluent in Spanish while drunk, but I definitely seem to think I am (at least, back when I could speak passable Spanish)

laurad75

I don't know how well this will translate in text (maybe you had to be there) but I used to take my dog to a training school each week to help her with basic commands and obedience.  It was a huge gymnasium type room with 30+ people working with their dogs in designated areas.  We were working on sit/stay and while she sat in her spot I was supposed to walk away and check on her every several steps to repeat stay.  I was walking backwards to keep her eye contact and tripped over a rope meant to separate our area.  As soon as I fell I started to laugh and one of the trainers came running over to make sure I wasn't hurt.  The dog then came bounding over to check on me and caused a stir so a bunch of other dogs started to bark and throw off everyone's training.  It was very embarrassing but also hilarious.  

halfanewt

Not sure how well this will translate, but here we go. 

When I went away to college, my dad decided it was the appropriate time to call and give me “the talk”. It was an hour+ of him talking at me (horribly awkward) and completely unnecessary. I grew up on a farm. 

A few days later, my aunt (his sister) called to say how awkward that must have been for me...then give a 30 minute run down of the yearly exams and all the things that could go wrong (she was a nurse). 

A few days later, my older cousin called to say how awkward it must have been for me to get both talks...then take 30 minutes to give me her favorite tips and tricks. 

A few days later, I was complaining about all of this to my friend, and she asked if it would be okay to talk to my family about it since hers wouldn’t. At this point I gave up and didn’t answer my phone for a few weeks...