Anyone else feel like they’re on the edge of their seat?

jaxbl

I’ve been up since 4 with horrible constant pain. Of course my mind went to the worst places, but I’m pretty convinced it’s gas. I’ll just be happy when I can stop freaking out about every little thing. 

ladyk127

@jaxbl yes, I've had a tiiiiny bit of spotting three times in the last two days, and even though I spotted the entire first trimester with my daughter I can't help but feel like it's always going to be worst case scenario.

shoogapoff

I don't know if this is helpful or not, but I check the miscarriage statistics for myself every single day. This website is very helpful for me and puts things in perspective. https://datayze.com/miscarriage-chart

emeraldcity1214

TW - loss

I hate that chart. It gives me absolutely no comfort. I fell in the 1% with my loss. This was after I had a great US confirming my massive SCH was healed and she had a great heart rate. Her heart just suddenly stopped beating 3 days later. 

OP, the best thing you can do is just take it one day at a time. Today you’re pregnant. You can’t control what happens tomorrow so enjoy what you have today. 

dancingnarwhal

I definitely have some nerves/anxiety. I think I'll feel a lot more comfortable after I've had my first prenatal appointment and am out of the first trimester. I'm trying not to worry too much though because I know it won't change anything. 

jaxbl

@ladyk127 My pregnancy with my daughter was the same. Tons of spotting, and some actual bleeding before I even realized I was pregnant. 
@shoogapoff that was super helpful and comforting, thank you! 
@emeraldcity1214 I'm sorry for your loss. My last time pregnant wound up in miscarriage, too. It has definitely left me more aware of the reality of loss.

emeraldcity1214

Feel free to jump into the PGAL thread. There are several of us feeling the exact same way as you and we all understand the fear and anxiety that come with being pregnant after a loss. 

ladyk127

I miss the peacefulness I had with my first pregnancy.  He was so easy.  No spotting, no real nausea.. other than gestational diabetes there were no issues.  You lose that peace after any type of loss and no pregnancy is without worry after that.  I was worried when I wasn't crampy at all, and then was worried the next day because I was crampy... lol it's honestly exhausting.  
@shoogapoff
I think there was a chart on The Bump somewhere with the probability of NOT having a miscarriage.  I have that on my phone and look at it every few days.  

shoogapoff

@ladyk127 The one I posted can be changed to either say odds of having a MC or is of NOT having a MC. 
@emeraldcity1214 I'm sorry for your loss. I hesitated to post the chart, because obviously *every* MC is a minority statistic, and whatever happens to you is 100%. Honestly I'm super triggered by hearing about late losses and losses without warning signs. I already feel like the unlucky minority with my infertility history, and this is our literal only shot at a baby because we only had 1 embryo from our ivf cycle. I've never had any good news related to being a mom, so I can't imagine actually making it to the end of this with a baby. I know that's the reality of pregnancy and numbers give me some comfort, even if it's short-lived. I just wanted to offer it as an option for others who might find it helpful. 

emeraldcity1214

@shoogapoff I get that. I know people get comfort from seeing those numbers. Those numbers just really irritate me. I hope this is your take home baby and the rest of this pregnancy is nothing but joy and good news. 

ladyk127

@shoogapoff For someone who is terrible at math, I am such a numbers person when it comes to stuff like this. I like looking at statistics. 

emeraldcity1214

@ladyk127 I just realized you’re already participating in the PGAL thread. 😆 I’m still working on getting used to everyone’s name. 

ladyk127

@emeraldcity1214 Don't worry, it's going to be even more confusing when more people join 

bobbyflies2020

@ladyk127 I feel this way, too. I already know I don't want to do any more egg retrievals, so the 3 embryos I have are all I have. This one was the best, so if it doesn't stick, the next will have a bit of a foreboding tone.

Many people have it worse, but I hate hiding all of my treatments from my son. Sending us all hugs! One day at a time! ✨

ashleyhj29

I have my 1st US today at 5w6d and my anxiety is thru the roof! Ive been doing IVF for a few years and we've received one bad news after another. I've never made it this far...my last pregnancy in July was ectopic, even thru IVF. 
How do you calm your anxiety? My symptoms come and go, other than being tired, and today I feel 100% normal. Aside from anxiety. Still spotting brown, had some cramps last night...I cant shake this doom and gloom feeling. 

ladyk127

@ashleyhj29 TW

I didn't spot for long with my miscarriages.  I spotted the night before and then by the next day was bleeding.  But with my daughter, I spotted for the ENTIRE first trimester, every single day.  So for me, spotting was with the viable pregnancy not with my miscarriages.  Sometimes it just happens.  It's definitely not always a sign of something bad.  Cramping is also totally normal and expected.  My symptoms come and go as well.  I barely had any symptoms at all with my son, so again not a sign of something bad.  Positive vibes!!  Everything that is happening is normal!  Good luck today!

surrenderdorothy

@ashleyhj29 I'll be thinking of you and hope your ultrasound goes well. I understand the constant worrying. What helps me, is getting some fresh air (even a walk around the block will do the trick). I also treat myself to something I enjoy- like going to my favorite bakery for a tea and a muffin for breakfast. Are you sharing the pregnancy news with close friends? A call to my bff always helps. GL! 

cyanope

Good luck today, @jaxbl! I hope everything goes well! 

lrynwnab

@ashleyhj29 how did it go?

ashleyhj29

@lrynwnab
Everything was perfect! We even got to see a heart flicker! I go back next week at 7w to hopefully hear/measure the heart rate. I made it thru the appt and got into my car and BURST into tears. I had bottled all my nerves/anxiety up for days and finally got the positive release I needed!

surrenderdorothy

@ashleyhj29 I kept checking yesterday looking for an update! So glad you had an appt and got a good report.

jaxbl

@ashleyhj29 Yaayyyy! I'm so glad it went well

BourbonBiscuits

@ashleyhj29 YAY! What a relief. Nothing like seeing that little heartbeat for the first time.

cyanope

@ashleyhj29, so happy to hear this news!!

lrynwnab

@ashleyhj29 wow, great news! So glad to hear it! What a relief. With your history I can understand your anxiety. I am right there with you with a m/c at 8w back in March. I had my transfer on 11/23 so am just a few days behind you; I have my first ultrasound on Monday. What day do you go back for your 7w appointment?

ashleyhj29

@lrynwnab Thank you! I go back on Thursday for my 7w...praying everything stays on course for everyone!

ashleyhj29

@lrynwnab How was your US today???

lrynwnab

@ashleyhj29 - thanks for asking - I had it today and the sac was there and measuring normally - but no heartbeat yet. So, have to wait another week and worry. By those IVF due date calculators I think I am 5w5d today, so seems early. I just talked to the nurse and my beta is at 5,278 so seems to be rising appropriately.

Good luck at your Thursday u/s!

bobbyflies2020

@lrynwnab That is an awesome beta number! 

ashleyhj29

Started red spotting tonight. Made appt for an US tomorrow morning. 🙏🏻

surrenderdorothy

I’m sorry to hear that, @ashleyhj29. I hope it is nothing. You’ll be in my thoughts.

jaxalia

Sending you all the positive energy @ashleyhj29  

shoogapoff

@ashleyhj29 💜💜💜

mrspants0809

@ashleyhj29 I hope it’s nothing and everything is ok. 💕

cyanope

Hoping it’s nothing to be concerned about, @ashleyhj29. I’ll be thinking about you! ❤️

jaxbl

@ashleyhj29 I'll be thinking of you today I hope all goes well.

claireloSC

Hope all is well @ashleyhj29

BourbonBiscuits

Thinking about you @ashleyhj29 - hoping the appointment goes well

ashleyhj29

Ladies...I had a miscarriage this morning. Started spotting red last night, no cramps, but when I woke up this morning I felt a gush and I passed some tissue. My US showed a completely empty uterus...just days after seeing a heartbeat. Such a bummer. We found out it was a girl and my doctor confirmed that what I passed was the sac. I didn't have any pain or cramping. Such a bummer....

shoogapoff

@ashleyhj29 I'm so very sorry! I'll be thinking of you. Please take care of yourself. 

lrynwnab

@ashleyhj29 I am so, so sorry. Thinking of you.