Vent but not a loss, just dont know how to feel. Do you know how I feel? — The Bump

Vent but not a loss, just dont know how to feel. Do you know how I feel?

I honestly don't know what I am feeling, I'm kinda stuck. 
Have any of you felt like this?
RET was done 2 days ago, nothing fertilized ( We used DH frozen sperm)  some eggs were frozen, DH is working overseas so I am here by myself.  I'm still in pain from the RET and it's a little hard for me to make it to the bathroom without going a little leakage. One minute I'm worried about OHSS, from a high E2 Level and next, I have to stop all meds because I won't be moving forward in the process. 
 I have to go to work tonight, I'll only work for 4 hours but I'll be standing on my feet. I'm grateful for my mother as she brought me home from the RET, but she just does not understand the whole process. So talking to her or my friends is not going to work. 
I just feel drained and want to lay on the sofa. I have not even taken a shower. (I'll take one before I go to work tonight). I'm a very busy person, and my productivity level had been at 5% these past 2 days. My body is tired, but I know we will be trying again in 2 to 3 months when DH comes home. 
I'm trying not to become consumed with things but I feel like I am going to, just to make sure we are successful the next time. 
Have you ever felt like this?
I just don't know what to do or how to feel. Some moments during the day, I dont feel anything. Im trying to process but, then I dont
Its like Im stuck. I want this moment in time to pass along, but its standing still. 
Do I make sense? 

Re: Vent but not a loss, just dont know how to feel. Do you know how I feel?

  • You do make sense. I think it’s more difficult because your husband is overseas, and no one can relate to you. But I’m here to tell you, there’s hope, try to think of the good. I know it’s easier said than done. I’m sure your RE will speak to you as to why it didn’t progress, And a new protocol will be written out specifically For your body’s needs to make this happen. Don’t lose hope, you can’t. Good luck to you, And wishing you all the best. 
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  • @chocolatesassy this whole process is so mentally and emotionally (not to mention physically) draining. I think it’s ok to take a day to yourself and just recharge, sleep, binge watch a favorite show for the 8th time. Whatever you need to do. I spent so much time and energy stressing during my last IVF round and it didn’t take. So all of that stress was for nothing. It didn’t impact the outcome. It was out of my hands. And it’s out of all of our hands. Infertility can feel like a sad and lonely club to be part of, but remember you’re not alone 💕 
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