PAIF Mommies- Fall/Winter 2020

cashewchicken

Hello!

Hoping to chat with new and veteran mommies again. How are you and what have you been up to?

cashewchicken

About me: I have a 2-month old daughter and a son who is 2.5 years old. Breastfeeding is going okay and I feel like I’m finally getting the hang of raising two kids. STMs, how is your older child handling the new arrival? My son was jealous and did not like our daughter initially, but it’s getting better. It’s still a struggle to get him to calm down around her though... he’s full of energy and he’s accidentally punched her a few times from jumping up and down near her. He’s also a screamer and has woken the baby up a few times

mtpbadger

Hello! I have an almost 2.5 year old and will be having my second sometime in the next 5 weeks so I’ll keep you updated on how that adjustment goes! Thankfully DD is fairly calm but we live in a 2 bedroom condo that’s already busting at the seams so it’ll be an interesting 6ish months before we move halfway across the country. 

How are you all planning on coping this winter (if you live in a cooler climate) with covid? Are you all planning on still socially distancing still and any activities planned for your kiddos?

cashewchicken

Hey @mtpbadger! 5 weeks to go, that’s exciting! I’m sure your daughter will be a great older sister.

My hope is to hunker down this winter to avoid Covid but it’ll be difficult with so many holidays/events this winter. We were invited to my SIL’s kids’ birthday party but we probably won’t go as I’m not sure how many families she is inviting (her family doesn’t shelter-in-place nearly to the extent we do). I don’t want to take chances with the newborn. I am debating whether to host a scaled-down 100-day celebration for my DD in November. I’ll decide based on the Covid case numbers. The case numbers are dropping where I live, but I also heard that the second wave is coming, so... I don’t know. And then there’s thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s...

hanshotfirst77

Hi! I have a 6 yr old boy and an almost 4 month old girl. Just went back to work this week and it’s such an adjustment. I was really enjoying maternity leave and did not want to go back to work. Juggling the kids and work is def a work in progress. Also I hate pumping. 

@cashewchicken my son is mostly good with the baby. He’s older so that presents different benefits and challenges. He’s good at helping he will grab me diapers or wipes and always wants to help pick out her clothes for the day. But he also gets kind of bored sometimes cause she’s not very fun yet. And sometimes I feel bad cause I’m dragging her everywhere for him. Soccer and baseball etc. 

@mtpbadger You’re so close! So exciting! As far as covid stuff. My son has been going to in person school since mid September and he’s been playing baseball and soccer. But they all have levels of mask wearing and social distancing. So far it’s working out ok. Im hoping to still have some holiday stuff with family but as responsibly as possible. 

wildrainbow

Hey y'all! I have a 4yo boy, an almost 2yo boy, and a 15week (8w adjusted) baby boy. I will be honest, we live in total chaos, lol. Baby was in NICU for 33 days after being born at 32 weeks, we came home 3 weeks before his due date, which was pretty awesome. We've been dealing with our share of jealousy from ds2. He turns 2 on Thursday (the 15th) and is a staunch mama's boy. I often have him and baby in my lap while I nurse. My house has taken a hard hit in the fact that I have little time to keep it clean, and H works all week, hence the chaos we live in. It's been a wild, crazy adventure, lol. 

@cashewchicken I'm glad your ds is getting better with the jealousy. It's so hard when they are still so little and need us, but so does baby. I try to make sure to snuggle ds2 a lot when baby is sleeping, this way he still gets undivided mommy time. It seems to help him. 

@mtpbadger You're so close!! Do you feel ready? As far as winter goes for us, we will be here. We live in a Hotspot, and I doubt it will get better for the winter, so we will just shelter in place and maybe do virtual Christmas, etc. 

@hanshotfirst77 Pumping is the absolute worst! I hate it too. 

mtpbadger

@hanshotfirst77 pumping uggggg. I exclusively pumped for the first three months with DD since she was a preemie and I hated every second of it. Hang in there!

@wildrainbow I’m ready to not be pregnant anymore but not sure if I’m ready to go into labor and have a new born again! 😬 I’ve made it past when DD when born at 32 weeks so I’m okay with this baby coming anytime it’s ready! Also really excited to finally find out if it’s a boy or girl! 

We will prob be hermits this winter with everything going on. Thankfully I was already mentally prepared to have a low key Christmas since we usually travel to Mn (from VA) to be with my fam and already knew that wasn’t going to happen with a newborn and while my inlaws are local, they don’t celebrate Christmas. They are already giving us a hard time that we are skipping thanksgiving but I’ll have maybe 2-3 week old and know I won’t feel up to socializing with them (they are not my favorite ppl and they have not been careful with social distancing or anything either. But still expect to come watch DD when I go into labor. Ha. They are not first on my list to call) 

31magnolia

Well this is my first, so I'm in a different boat than the rest of you. Although, I never wanted to have just one child, I don't know if I could do another one. LOL. I think I'm too old for this! My OB/GYN is waiting for me to decide because of me being AMA.  I will say we were having a tough time with her feedings and she was breaking out (rashes, infant acne, eczema), horrible poop diapers, and violent spit ups. So I've been changing her formula. Two days ago I finally switched it to a lactose free, protein free formula and BOOM, the rashes have cleared up and just everything is better! I don't know why I'm surprised because I'm lactose intolerant, but I didn't get bad until I was an adult. Although, my mom says when I was a baby she had to switch me to soy formula because I also had a hard time with milk formula. Anyhoo, I'm just glad she's doing much better!

[Deleted User]

I'm sorry you had your formula struggles. @31magnolia out of curiosity, what's the new formula you found?  I had to give up dairy and that dramatically helped baby girl's spitting up and rash, so now I'm a bit hesitant about if I had to supplement, starting her on a dairy based formula, even though DD did quite well on it.  I'm bummed because I stocked up, feeling like it was a pretty good one -- and it is!  So time will tell, but it would be nice to have another option in mind that comes recommended.

mbradfo2

Greetings! I have a 2.5 year old girl from a FET and am looking at potentially starting a new ER this Jan. 

I'm actually looking forward to making the holidays special this year even with all of the limitations due to covid. We aren't going to be able to do our normal "traditions" -- Christmas day with my parents, Christmas eve out at a nice restaurant...so I've been trying to focus on how to make Christmas magical with being stuck at home. I've already planned out where the decorations are going, ordered a few Christmas presents due to sales, and our advent calendar arrived yesterday. 

31magnolia

@BusinessWife - It's the similac anlimentum. But I may have spoken to soon. It definitely helped with the rash but the spit up started again. I came to the conclusion that she has GERD and today the doctor agreed.  She went ahead and prescribed a medication, since I am already doing everything else I can (feeding sitting, keeping baby upright for 30 minutes, etc.).  Yesterday I went ahead and reduced her bottles from 5 oz to 4 oz to see if that would also help. Fingers crossed.
How are you doing?

wildrainbow

@31magnolia Fellow reflux mom 3x over. Be aware that it takes about 2 weeks for the meds to really start working. Also, know that the meds will not necessarily stop her from spitting up, they will just keep her reflux under control. Reflux peaks at around 4 mo typically, so make sure they adjust her meds then to accommodate. 

31magnolia

@wildrainbow - How are you doing? Thanks for the info! When you say under control does that mean her spit up will be normal spit up now or will it still be more like vomit? Also, will it control how often it occurs? When did your children outgrow it? I feel so bad for her. I can't imagine it peaking. It's already bad. But the doctor said the same thing. We're starting her out with Pepcid first but if it doesn't work the doctor said we can look the prevacid, etc.

wildrainbow

@31magnolia Pepcid is good. It will help tremendously. What will happen is that her spit up will not smell like acid. She may have normal spit up, but it should no longer be a forceful throwing up. She may quit spitting up all together, ds2 was a projectile vomiter with severe GERD and pepcid helped him a lot. He rarely spit up, only if I ate something spicy or he did when he started solids. Usually, by the time they are ready to start solids at 6mo, you will see a decline. Ds1 grew out of it around that time, ds2 was worse and was under the care of a GI and he was released from them in April of this year,  he just turned 2. It all depends on how bad it is. 

I am good. B is on pepcid too for his reflux. He's a silent refluxer and doesn't spit up too much, very different from the projectile vomiting I'm used to. We have several specialist appointments coming up. He has a swallow study at the end of this month to make sure he isn't aspirating since he chokes quite a bit, and a neuro appointment in January to check for Cerebral Palsy because he has tight muscle tone, especially in his trunk. So, I'm just trying to take things one thing at a time not to freak out if I can. It's not easy, I won't lie. 

mbradfo2

@31magnolia
Fortunately, Anne-Banane only had some mild reflux so we didn't need meds, but my dad (pediatrician for 30+ years) suggested mixing a little cereal into her formula once she got a bit older to help prevent some spit up. We started that at around 4 months and didn't have any spit up issues after that. Also helped tame the baby crankies - since she got very cranky whenever her tummy was empty and the cereal/formula mix kept her full longer! She's still like that at 2.5 and is very much a grazing type eater rather than eating defined meals -- she'll have a bunch of snacks over the course of the morning instead of a single breakfast (which I offer to her, but she will usually just want a snack type meal like some cut fruit, and then some cereal to munch on, etc). We have her sit for lunch and dinner like human beings, but she only picks at the food and then wants a poptart later.  /sigh   but the doctor said she's growing fine -- she's a tall girl!

Once you start introducing solids, that's likely to help anyway. One of my nieces had horrible reflux/GERD as an infant and she mostly grew out of it by toddlerhood, but she is a very picky eater now (not sure if that's related, but I suspect having negative experiences with eating and then getting reflux can't help). 

I think I stopped getting coupon codes for similac a while back, but I'll keep an eye out for anything in my email or at work (I work at my dad's pediatric practice). I know the alimentum can get pricey >.<

31magnolia

@wildrainbow - Thanks for the info. She's been on Pepcid for 3 days now, and every time I think she's doing well she spits up. The doctor wants me to give the meds 30 min before she eats, which is hard to do because I can't time her eating. I've been trying to give it to her while she sleeps and then just wake her up 30 minutes later to feed. That's only worked once. All other times she wakes herself up and then screams for food. That's what happened today. So there was only a 12 minute span between the medicine and her feeding. Of course she threw up twice and last night she still choked. Hopefully, relief is around the corner and her little body has time to heal.
I will definitely be keeping you and your LO in my prayers. I know that has to be stressful. Stay positive.  I still find myself getting super worried concerned every time baby girl does or does not do something. Google can sometimes be bad for my sanity!

@mbradfo2 - I did hear that spit up in the formula can help. I also heard that GERD peaks at 4 months. So if I can cereal around that time that would be great. Thanks for looking out for coupons!

mbradfo2

https://www.facebook.com/groups/563424387441169

I was just reminded that not all of our new mommies have our facebook group info -- just join that group and give your bump screen-name when joining so we can approve you! We try to do Sunday snapshots and other chatter as things pop up

Anne and I have been ill for the past couple days with some sort of sinus cold - ick. Seems to have skipped my husband for whatever reason, but we're both feeling much better today.  Anne's currently enjoying a late snack/lunch of soup while watching her favorite Minnie Bow-Toons and I'm just glad to see her perked up. We spent most of yesterday cuddled up in her room in various stages of sleep/wake. 

I have to do a deep dive in her toys and sort out the baby ones she's outgrown. It's amazing how much she has grown in just a year! I'm looking forward to being able to play candyland with her eventually -- I was a pro-Candyland player as a kid and I hope she enjoys it as much as I did! We're big on board games in our house so being able to include her in them will be so much fun!

cashewchicken

@hanshotfirst77 That’s great that your son is good with the baby. I’m sure as your daughter grows becomes more fun, they will be even closer. I agree with hating pumping. So much so that I haven’t done much pumping this time around. I’ve been meaning to do a bottle feeding once a day but that’s not going well. 

@wildrainbow I don’t know how you handle 3 kids, as I’m struggling with just two! It’s cute that your 2 year old is mama’s boy. My son was too, until we came home with the baby. These days whenever he wakes up from a nightmare, he wants nothing to do with me. Always asking for his dad. Breaks my heart. 

@mtpbadger Congrats on your baby boy! Hope your adjustment to your new life as a mom of 2 is going well!
@31magnolia Welcome and congrats on your baby! I’m sorry that you are having feeding issues with your baby. Hope the medicine works soon. 

@BusinessWife Hello! Hope your life as a mom of two is going well!
@mbradfo2 That’s great that you are making the holidays special for your daughter despite the pandemic. Being a lazy mom, I have not celebrated any holidays with my son yet. We have a Christmas tree made with felt that my mom got for our son last year but other than that nothing planned so far. Now that I’m not working and have more time, I should plan something fun for him. 

Ugh, so much has happened since my last post. I lost my job It wasn’t unexpected because it was after a series of reorganizations but still. I’ve been telling my friends and family for years that I don’t love my job but I’m staying with the company only because it just wasn’t the right time to switch with wanting to start a family (which took a while with IF) and have two kids. Well, I guess now I have no excuse to look for a new job! In a way it’s good that it happened after I had DD since I was able to claim state benefits and also gives me more time to bond with her now. 

31magnolia

@cashewchicken - Sorry about your job! I'm sure you'll find something you enjoy soon. 

cashewchicken

@31magnolia Thank you! I’m going back and forth wanting to find a job soon and wanting to stay home with DD with the pandemic raging. Fortunately we are okay financially so that’s one thing we don’t have to worry about. 

I’m in a bit of a pickle. DD does not like to drink from a bottle. I thought I will be working from home so I didn’t spend much effort getting her to drink from the bottle. Now I realized that was a huge mistake. She does not like the nipples we have now (Avent and Pigeon). Mamas, do you have a nipple that you recommend? I bought a Comotomo and a TommyTippee bottles to test. 

wildrainbow

@cashewchicken I know you will find something when you're ready. As far as the bottle goes, does she take a bottle for your H?  B never took a bottle for me, even in NICU, so I didn't get to do any feeds until he was ready to nurse. That said, all my boys have preferred Dr. Browns bottles and nipples. I always use nothing faster than a 1 because they need to work for it from the bottle the same as from the breast. 

I got crafty today and made a hat for B since it's finally getting chilly (ish) down here 

cashewchicken

@wildrainbow Oh the hat is adorable! You’re talented! 

Thanks for your recommendation. I’ve heard good things about Dr. Brown bottles. Will definitely check it out if the bottles we have now don’t pan out. My husband is the one tasked to give DD the bottle. I’ve read that with me she may expect to be breastfed and not take the bottle.

DD drank out of MAM bottle yesterday after 30 minutes of putting up a fight. And she drank it again today this time after 20 min of struggling. Hopefully by the end of next week she will drink without complaining too much. 😊  

Hopeful_mom

Hi ladies!! I cannot believe how long it’s been, The bump has been a pain to get into sorry I’ve been MIA! Congrats on everyone’s babies!! Delivery is never easy but during covid had to be even more stressful!!! 

@wildrainbow I see you’ve had a bit of a bumpy road! So glad you have everyone home! Omg how insanely you must be with all your boys, it’s wonderful!! And gd bless u had time to be crafty! Super cute! 

@31magnolia Awwwww you’re a mommy! She’s here how exciting! Sorry u had the formula issues hope she’s feeling. 

@cashewchicken I can’t believe your princess is here, wow! Hope delivery was painless as it can be sorry about the job but glad you can be home and safe with your babies! 

Hopeful_mom

@BusinessWife I think I missed your update but your lil bundle should be here too! How r u doing? 

cashewchicken

@Hopeful_mom How are you and your baby girl doing? My delivery was alright, it was a repeat c-section and the recovery's been fine so far. I'm thankful that I had an uneventful pregnancy and that DD is an easy baby. She started sleeping 6+ hours/night starting at a month old! She's almost 4 months now and twice this week she slept 9 hours straight! DS woke up every 3 hours to feed, so I'm loving not having to wake up so often to feed.

mbradfo2

@cashewchicken
I'm currently not working (my choice)  due to being overwhelmed by stay-at-home, no preschool (DH doesn't want Anne in a preschool again until there's a vaccine), etc and then upcoming ER/transfer hopefully. I look at it as a good time to enjoy her and consider what I want to do as my next step moving forward. DH is dying for me to get a job at the university he works for (and they did just post one that is totally in my wheelhouse) since they will fully pay for our benefits then. But a faculty position at the school we want Anne to attend would guarantee her a slot and if I could get one in my area of expertise (French lit/lang, linguistics, or Eng lit/comp), I would be very happy with it as well professionally. So I'm thinking of getting my teaching cert during this time (since I only taught college level before and didn't need the cert) and a specialty cert in a couple different areas to look more attractive. It's a pretty competitive school academically so I'm hoping my experience as a college prof will be more to my advantage rather than against (since I don't have grade school teaching experience except for pre-K).
 
My sister announced somewhat unexpectedly that they'll be moving pretty far away and back to where we grew up so I've been adjusting to that news. In a way, I'm a little jealous since I would love to move back, but DH's position is just too good for us to even consider that (unless he could get an equivalent position there). I understand her reasoning but I'm sad for the loss of nearby cousins for Anne. The only ball up in the air is that DH will be visiting that city/area for the first time next month and if he likes it enough, he might just say, 'screw it' and reach out to some headhunters in the area. We tend to do things on the fly like that haha. 

Hopeful_mom

@cashewchicken How amazing is that!! Mine still doesn’t give me 9hrs now straight, talk about every child being different! My daughter is a dream come true! She’s so feisty and a lil boss! Still struggling to ween her she just won’t budge so that’s a big hurdle right now.  I still look at her and can’t believe she’s here! Now you’ve got that feeling Times two  

[Deleted User]

@Hopeful_mom Thank you!  Yes we are all here and doing well! ❤️❤️❤️ Nice to hear from you.

cashewchicken

Hi @mbradfo2, thanks for sharing your story. I'm currently using this time to work towards my next step, too. I've been wanting to switch my career for about a couple of years now and with the layoff, I’ve finally decided to take action. Luckily I was just offered a position in the new field. I also enrolled myself in online coursework to gain more knowledge in the area. Hope you get your teaching post!

So DD is now drinking from the bottle without much struggle. Hurray! She really only struggled for about 3 days and after that, she’s been drinking from the bottle no problem. Now even I can give her the bottle. One hurdle cleared for my return to work (I have to go in the office sigh)

[Deleted User]

Oh good! @cashewchicken that is such a relief!  I struggled with baby girl accepting a bottle as well and legit cried happy tears when she finally drank from it!  They are not the same ones DD used however, so now I have So. Many. Extra bottles I won't be needed now.  Sigh.  Someone in the family is expecting her first so I'm hoping if she likes them (I even have a few NIP) I can pass them along to someone who will benefit. 🤷. Still hoping for another child, but who knew something like a bottle could be so personal to the kid!?  I had definitely heard that some babies have a bottle preference, but I must have just gotten lucky with DD so I didn't put much stock in it... 😬