October PGAL Check-In

manillabar

This thread is for anyone who has experienced loss at any point in pregnancy or experienced the loss of a child. ((Please feel free to share your loss story if you haven’t already.)) Also a general TW (trigger warning) in that previous losses will likely be discussed in this thread.  Feel free to bump this thread back up throughout the month any time you have a question or would like some support.

How far along are you? 

How are you feeling (symptoms, mentally/emotionally)? 

Any upcoming appointments? 

GTKY: Would you rather have unlimited sushi for life or unlimited tacos for life?

manillabar

How far along are you? 17w2d

How are you feeling (symptoms, mentally/emotionally)? Aversions are still around but getting better little by little. Heartburn is still killing me.  

But today I have been feeling particularly on edge/triggered by Chrissy Tiegen’s situation. I feel so heartbroken for her but also it’s heightening my anxiety considering how far along she was. 

Any upcoming appointments? Anatomy US in 3 weeks

GTKY: Would you rather have unlimited sushi for life or unlimited tacos for life? This is hard but I think maybe tacos, especially if I can have all different types of tacos 🤤

kloe818

How far along are you? 17w4d

How are you feeling (symptoms, mentally/emotionally)? Physically great aside from bug bites and heartburn. A little triggered today by Chrissy Tiegen. 

Any upcoming appointments? Next week, tuesday. Anatomy Scan.

GTKY: Would you rather have unlimited sushi for life or unlimited tacos for life? Tacos. 

@manillabar I was 100% going to post on the last PGAL to see if anyone else was triggered. I saw it 5 minutes before I had to be on a videoconference and had to let it out and pull myself together so quick. Same reasons as you...sad for her and anxious for me. Considered calling my OB to see if I could sneak in for a heartbeat check today. 

treebagel

How far along are you? 16+4

How are you feeling (symptoms, mentally/emotionally)? Much better, I think I’m emotionally ready to be optimistic and happy. Physically I’m in pain from work, standing all day. My back and feet are killing me. I am probably going to tell them I’m prego soon. Occasional headache but that’s better since switching to labetolol. Taking Pepcid every morning keeps heartburn away until evening. 

Any upcoming appointments? AS 10/26 but I need to reschedule due to work. Ugh. 

GTKY: Would you rather have unlimited sushi for life or unlimited tacos for life? Tacos! Love sushi but tacos definitely win here. 

I feel like my tags aren’t working- but I’m having the same feelings as you ladies regarding chrissy’s pg loss. So sad and made me anxious. 

kloe818

Yeah there's a mess happening with the tags. I had to try several times. I mentioned to my sister my feelings and she went into this monolog about how I shouldn't focus on all the bad things that could happen and focus on the good things and I just went "Do you think I only think bad things all the time?? NO! I am allowed to be triggered by bad news like this. It's normal. Thank GOD you've never gone through this because you have no idea."
She came back with "Well my biggest fears are (nieces' names blanked out) A being taken away from me by (her dad) and (husband's name) leaving me and taking S." Yeah because your child living in another home is exactly the same as having 2 miscarriages. Sure. 

manillabar

@kloe818 ugh some people just don’t understand. I read something recently about “toxic positivity,” which is what your sister’s original comment sounds like. I’m sure she thought she was being encouraging but it doesn’t help!  I think people with losses and/or fertility struggles are all feeling the same right now.

kloe818

@manillabar I'm to the point I'm texting her my moods as they come. Also, despite being told it would take me a long time to feel the baby move due to anterior placenta, if I concentrate after I eat, I can sometimes feel the baby moving so that's helping with the anxiety. Baby moves more noticeably after pizza or Mexican food, which hubby and I find funny because those are 2 of our favorite foods. We'll try Chinese next week and see how that well that works (his absolute favorite food). Baby was meh about pot roast earlier this week   

mvt2003

How far along are you? 14+3

How are you feeling (symptoms, mentally/emotionally)? Still feeling queasy, so hoping that will be done soon! I'm feeling a bit better emotionally, although include me on the list of people who are devastated for Chrissy Teigen and who also immediately gets brought back to my own traumas. I have literally been in her shoes this pregnancy with my SCH (although I realize her issues were not the same) when blood was literally gushing out of me every time I stood up. 

Any upcoming appointments? Have to schedule my anatomy scan and appt for 19 weeks! I should probably call now... 

GTKY: Would you rather have unlimited sushi for life or unlimited tacos for life? Sushi please!!!! Tacos are kind of an aversion right now, whereas a fellow pregnant friend and I are fantasizing about sushi together knowing neither of us should have it!  

sunny_native14

I was totally and completely devastated after learning about Chrissy Teigen's experience. I had a phone appointment with my midwife yesterday evening and literally burst into tears twice talking about waiting to feel baby and scheduling an appointment to hear the heartbeat. I was a mess yesterday. Today is a bit better. Definitely can't wait to feel this little one more regularly! 

redselig

How far along are you? 14+4 weeks

How are you feeling (symptoms, mentally/emotionally)?  

Like many of you have already mentioned, triggered by Chrissy Teigen’s news. I’ve had the NT Scan and NIPT results and all seems well. I’ve had very light brown spotting throughout this pregnancy which I never had during my last. My doctor told me not to worry about it but of course it’s always on the back of my mind. 

Any upcoming appointments? Scan at 17 weeks

GTKY: Would you rather have unlimited sushi for life or unlimited tacos for life?

I love both but it’s hard to compare because I’m not sure if I’ve ever had a really good taco. I watched season 1 of the Taco Chronicles and I think I need to go to Mexico to experience how good tacos can be. Just the very mention of sushi makes me crave it even though it’s on the list of my taboo foods. 

kloe818

I had been feeling the baby move at least a little bit every other day/every day for the past week or so. Haven't felt anything since Thursday that I can be sure of. Trying not to freak out but not really succeeding. The logical part of my brain says it's just a position she's in right now that the placenta is in the way and I've been doing a LOT of activity the past 2 days so I just haven't noticed it. The PGAL brain is already disconnecting... 

treebagel

@kloe818 I could have written your exact post. I hate the ups and downs. I am using your same logic to not freak out, but even knowing movement is inconsistent until 28 weeks doesn’t help all the time. You’re not alone. I almost wish I never felt anything this early!  

kloe818

@treebagel that makes me feel so much better. SO much better. 

manillabar

@kloe818 I’m there with you too! Even having had a baby and gone through all this before, the PGAL mindset is strong! Hope baby girl moves again for you soon, but @treebagel is totally right, you’re not expected to have consistent movement until closer to 28w, which is why kick counts aren’t really recommended until that time.

kloe818

@manillabar thank you. I think I'm feeling her again but I'm still going to call for a heartbeat check in the morning just to be sure. 

kloe818

I ended up not calling because she was moving around SO MUCH Sunday afternoon and evening, and again last night when we went to bed that I feel secure. I mean she was bouncing around last night when we went to bed like a mexican jumping bean. It made me laugh.