Week 3 (12/15-12/21) Check-In 06/07/2020

sierra2020

Estimated Due Date/Weeks + Days:

FTM/STM/STM+: 

Team Green/Pink/Blue: 

Interesting Baby Fact/Baby is the size of: 

Upcoming appointments: 

How are you feeling: 

Rants/Raves: 

Questions:

GTKY: If you could only eat one meal for the rest of your life, what would it be?

hham10

Estimated Due Date/Weeks + Days: 11w6d

FTM/STM/STM+:  4th

Team Green/Pink/Blue: well know tomorrow!

Interesting Baby Fact/Baby is the size of: I should really figure this out. 

Upcoming appointments: This Thursday 

How are you feeling: Fine other than throwing out my back today and can’t walk 😩 and I’m pretty huge so hoping it evens out at some point. 

Rants/Raves: today while just making breakfast I someone threw out my back. Now I can’t walk straight and am in agonizing pain. Praying this heals quickly because I need a strong pain killer and this Tylenol isn’t cutting it. 

Questions: None for now 

GTKY: If you could only eat one meal for the rest of your life, what would it be? I’d probably play it safe and go with pizza. 

willashbaby

Estimated Due Date/Weeks + Days: 12/18 12+3

FTM/STM/STM+: STM

Team Green/Pink/Blue: I should know soon!

Interesting Baby Fact/Baby is the size of: Packet of sugar?

Upcoming appointments: Tomorrow! NT scan, NIPT, glucose test, all the fun!

How are you feeling: Much much better.

Rants/Raves: Nothing really, I just need to get tomorrow over with so I see that baby is OK. Then the NIPT results, then we'll tell more people (right now it's just parents and some close friends). DH got called back from Furlough and we have no plans to tell his work for awhile, we want to make sure we don't give them an excuse to furlough him again (our state has paid parental leave). 

Questions: None.

GTKY: If you could only eat one meal for the rest of your life, what would it be? Mac and Cheese with Shortrib!

notvincent

Estimated Due Date/Weeks + Days: 12/19. 12w2d

FTM/STM/STM+: STM+ Third baby

Team Green/Pink/Blue: Blue!

Interesting Baby Fact/Baby is the size of: A ripe apricot. Or a kiwi.

Upcoming appointments: The last week of June I have a regular OB appointment

How are you feeling: Maybe a little better? Slightly less nauseated every day. Everything still stinks, though.

Rants/Raves: I'm so tired today! I've been sleeping like crap and having all kinds of weird dreams. Also, somehow, we have ants all over our house. We have to call someone to take care of that.

Questions: None really.

GTKY: If you could only eat one meal for the rest of your life, what would it be? Tortellini with arrabiatta sauce and meatballs.

luckypenny11

Estimated Due Date/Weeks + Days: 12/17, 12+4

FTM/STM/STM+: STM

Team Green/Pink/Blue: pink 

Interesting Baby Fact/Baby is the size of: apricot/hacky sack/chicken nugget

Upcoming appointments: OB appt and AFP testing 6/30

How are you feeling: <knock on wood> continuing to feel a little more normal; occasional but manageable nausea and daily bouts of fatigue.  I'm hoping to get back to lunchtime exercise but all I want to do is sleeeeeeeep.

Rants/Raves: Rave - with the NIPT results looking good, we've started to tell more friends.  They've all been pretty surprised (I think mostly given proximity to DD) but very supportive 

Questions: for those of you with 2+ kids already, how long did you want help from parents/friends after you got back from the hospital? I suspect most of the help will be needed for DD1 until DH and I figure out a new routine, but I have no idea how long that will be.  My parents are already looking at plane tickets given the proximity to Christmas travel and a likely need to quarantine before we can all interact. 

GTKY: If you could only eat one meal for the rest of your life, what would it be? Might be cheating a little, but sandwiches! Endless variety of proteins, veggies, cheese, and hot or cold.  My non-preggo fave is a toasted english muffin with honey smoked turkey, romaine, caramelized onion, and honey mustard. 

shelmcclel

Estimated Due Date/Weeks + Days: 12/15, 12w + 6d

FTM/STM/STM+: FTM

Team Green/Pink/Blue: Its a girl!!! We got our NIPT results back last Tuesday. 

Interesting Baby Fact/Baby is the size of: Plum/ripe apricot/lime - or yesterday the height of a tennis ball which seems significantly bigger than all of these fruits.

Upcoming appointments: tomorrow for my NT U/S

How are you feeling: Pretty good. I am waking up with way more energy to do more. But I am burning that energy really quickly. All of the closets in our 94 year old house have really ancient/inefficient organizers in them, so we are going to redo them before the baby. I'm trying to clean everything out to take measurements. I got through one small closet yesterday before having to take a nap. This would have normally taken me 1 day total. Looks like its going to be spread out over the course of this week.

Rants/Raves: This falls into the category of both, but is mostly a rant. My MIL is super excited about her granddaughter, which is amazing and so great and nice. And she wants to be a part of every step which is great because my Mom passed away 2 years ago, so its nice to have a Mom involved. But she's also hounding me multiple times per day about EVERYTHING baby. My mom would NEVER have done this. She would have offered advice when I asked for it, and otherwise would have let me do my thing. Examples of what I've dealt with in the last week alone:

What am I eating today? Shouldn't I also eat x, y, z? She is concerned about my the stress level of my job (corporate lawyer) and its effect on the baby. How big is the baby today? What about today? How about now? When can she start buying stuff for us - she is ready to ship us the Snoo now because of all of the "quarantine babies" and its probably going to sell out if we wait any longer. (my reaction was ) When can she tell certain people she hasn't told. A reminder of the list of people she has already told, how she told them, and exact details on how they reacted. When are we going to post our social media announcement? Can we do it before Wednesday because she's having lunch with friends that day. We need to make sure to call a list of people to tell them before we post the announcement, but we should Facetime a specific list of people not just call, and can we tell her after each person so she can then call? Am I planning to breastfeed? She wants to come live with us for the first month or two so her son doesn't have to help with overnight feedings (in sum my answer was "No.") I should buy the Nuk bottles because that's what her son loved the most 40 years ago. Why I shouldn't get an epidural. I should start journal-ing to our daughter so one day she can know my innermost thoughts and feelings while I am pregnant, since my Mom is dead and I can't know my Mom's thoughts on pregnancy, don't I want my daughter to be able to know? Also in response to me saying I know I wish I could ask my Mom so much right now. She said "Even if she was here, she wouldn't remember her pregnancy anyway." (this one was 100% the worst comment and it took everything in me not to react like a psycho - I just said "ok") What is our current name list. Has it changed? Have we added any more ideas since yesterday? Why am I not okay with her wearing the baby in a kangaroo pouch shirt? Can she buy the baby a cheerleader outfit for every sports team my husband likes?

It is simply maddening.

Questions: how to deal with the above.

GTKY: If you could only eat one meal for the rest of your life, what would it be?

A lithuanian dish called Kugela (or kugelis) with a lot of sour cream.

gh1219

This is not my board.  But oh. My. God. @shelmcclel ... I'm in shock.  Just to field all of that is much more than I could do.  I'm so impressed!!  I have no advice for you other than "you can do it!" and at this time I'm grateful my MIL is on another continent and doesn't speak much English.

JBcakes08

*lurking from week 1*

@shelmcclel OMG 
I would lose it, I am so sorry 😣

willashbaby

@shelmcclel I would die, or kill her and live happily ever after 

luckypenny11

@shelmcclel - I'm exhausted for you! Can you enlist your husband to run interference and help establish some healthy boundaries now?  Not that she shouldn't respect your words/wishes, but I've found that a) some things go over much better from the offending parent's own child, and b) a united front is *really* important.  If you haven't seen it before, I'm a big fan of Slate's "Care and Feeding" advice column - there are lots of great entries on how to manage overbearing/over-enthusiastic grandparents.  Sending you some patience and strength vibes! 

shelmcclel

Thanks guys for your support. @willashbaby @gh1219 @JBcakes08 @luckypenny11   I’ve been mentioning how exhausting her questions/texts are becoming to my H but he just said this weekend “she’s just really excited, this is an important time for her too.” It’s slightly complicated by the fact that my FIL passed away suddenly last Fall, and she’s all of a sudden bored & alone Bc of quarantine, so I’m trying to be empathetic but I have a limit and I’m at it. She’s also, truly, one of the nicest people on the planet and I know she means well. She’s just way over zealous lately. I’ve been trying to create some space - I.e. just not sharing as much details, or offering anything except when she asks. I’ll have to make H intervene if this continues. I am slightly worried that this is never going to stop, though. 

@luckypenny11 I’m also going to check out that Slate column!

dobiemom11

@shelmcclel. Oh my!  I thought my MIL was driving me crazy, but that is way worse.  She texts me all the time asking how I am feeling and how the baby is doing.  I know she is excited, but now it seems like three people are daily asking me how it is going through text messages.  First of all, how many ways can you say I feel crappy?  And secondly it makes my anxiety go off with all the messages and trying to figure out what to respond. 

Maybe not the best strategy but I often don't reply or reply much later to her messages.  Just so it gives me a little breathing room! Then I mention I was napping or not feeling well.  Reminder that this isn't easy. My husband also responds sometimes on his phone to help divert some attention from me.  I have also been looking on Pinterest for ways to set boundaries!  

I am also getting hounded on the when can she tell people thing.  She is gonna be pissed when I tell her we are not putting it in FB! 

You got this!  You are a strong Momma and keep kicking butt.  

readermom1

@shelmcclel She is too much! I would definitely feel the same as you on this one! Could you give her a project to keep her busy, like maybe a family history book for baby? Or if she’s crafty, maybe knit a blanket/sew a quilt or curtains? If that doesn’t work, I think your DH is going to have to gently tell her to back off.

readermom1

Estimated Due Date/Weeks + Days: 12+2

FTM/STM/STM+: 4th time mom

Team Green/Pink/Blue: I had my NIPT today. Hopefully I’ll know in about a week!

Interesting Baby Fact/Baby is the size of: the height of a Rubix Cube

Upcoming appointments: I had one today, so not another until July 1.

How are you feeling: Ok, still exhausted and still nauseous every evening, but it is definitely improving.

Rants/Raves: I just saw the little munchkin at my appointment today with good growth. It is always so good to see that heartbeat!!!

Questions: None really.

GTKY: If you could only eat one meal for the rest of your life, what would it be? Right now, I’d probably say pizza!

readermom1

@luckypenny11 I have been thinking about your question about help with the transition to 2 kids. I think it really depends on how old your 1st is, and I think your DD is younger. When my 2nd was born, my 1st was only 19 months old, so not really independent. I had a lot of extra help from DH (of course) and family for about the first 3-4 weeks, but my family all live in town, so I didn’t have anybody staying at my house. My DH didn’t have a lot of leave, so he made a schedule of family helping out, so I wasn’t on my own at the beginning. You’re right, it was mostly about giving DS attention during that time, plus some help with housework. Once I got nursing established and it didn’t take forever anymore we settled into a routine that became very manageable for me on my own. When I was pregnant, I made a bunch of “busy bags” with toys/activities for DS that I could pull out while I was nursing and he would play on the floor by me or he would cuddle up with us and I would read to him, while I fed her. Sometimes we would watch Daniel Tiger while I nursed on the couch. I also would put him in his high chair with crayons while I sat at the kitchen table and nursed. The main thing was to keep him out of trouble when I didn’t have a free hand. Then, when the baby was napping, I gave him plenty of one on one attention. 

*There are tons of lists of ideas for busy bags online based on the age of your child. Most are pretty easy to put together.

*Sorry for the novel!

luckypenny11

@readermom1 - thank you so much, and the more info the better!   DD will be 16mos, so definitely not very independent.  I was hoping we could get away with less help (I love my family but sometimes they're a lot to handle) but I really want to make sure DD has as smooth of a transition as possible.  The busy bags are a great tip - definitely looking into that 

sweet3261

*Moving to this week's check-in due to a change in due date. ☺️

Due Date/Weeks + Days: 12/20

FTM/STM/STM+: Third baby

Team Green/Pink/Blue: Will find out

Interesting Baby Fact/Baby is the size of: I forgot to check this week!

Upcoming appointments: Not until mid-July

How are you feeling: Feeling better lately. Still tired, but not as nauseous

Rants/Raves: My OB office is consolidating appointments and stretching the time between appointments due to covid, so instead of a check every 4 weeks, it will be every 6 which worries me.
Is anyone else's OB implementing changes like this? 

I had my blood drawn this past Tuesday, but my office doesn't offer the NIPT so I need to have the second half of the blood work done at the next appointment - which isn't for another 6 weeks. I had the NIPT with my previous two pregnancies so I'm unfamiliar with this. 

Questions: Just the one above.

GTKY: If you could only eat one meal for the rest of your life, what would it be? Any kind of pasta

willashbaby

@sweet3261 No, I'm in NY and still go every 4 weeks. I think it's very odd that the office doesn't "offer" NIPT. It's done through a company so why wouldn't it be? I would push on that to find out and maybe look elsewhere. 

hham10

@luckypenny11 when my 2nd was born my son was 18 months and when my 3rd was born my oldest was 2.5 and 2nd was 17 months. I definitely liked having help with my other children especially because they were not independent at all. At the time I still sent my kiddos to daycare a couple days a week for help so any extra help or support was appreciated. 

sweet3261

@willashbaby thank you. I called again and they said that it's because I'm not over 35 and not considered high risk for genetic disorders. I guess I was just surprised I wasnt given the option when I had it done at a different provider in earlier pregnancies and was given that choice. Thanks again for your response! 

dobiemom11

@sweet3261. My doctor said that I could pay for the test out of pocket if my insurance wouldn't cover it.  They didn't think my insurance would cover it, since I am in a similar boat to you (not 35 and no increased risk for genetic disorders).  Maybe you can look into that if you are really interested in getting the test run.  At my doctor, it was 300 dollars to pay for it myself and almost 500 to pay for it with my insurance (but that money went towards the deductible.  Insurance is so silly!)