PGAL Check-in 04/26

mimser

How far along are you?

How are you feeling (symptoms, mentally/emotionally)?

Any upcoming appointments?

Any milestones? Or milestones you are trying to get to? (Made it to a specific week, heard baby’s heartbeat, baby bump, baby movement, etc)

What are you doing to keep any worries away? 

GTKY: What was your childhood nickname? 

mimser

How far along are you? 13 weeks

How are you feeling (symptoms, mentally/emotionally)? I still have sore boobs, although less than they used to be. Less fatigue too, I successfuly skipped my nap yesterday! I wonder if that will stay the whole time. I felt so good for a few days after my 12 week ultrasound then got a call to double check the genetic test and I started to feel anxious again. The genetic counselor opened up saying she's not worried for me, but I guess I thought I was as sure as possible to this day that things were going well and now we have to wait another week. When I look at the numbers I even feel ridiculous getting myself worked up... my fiancé said it's as if I wanted an A+ and got a B and now I'm that annoying student who acts like she failed when she clearly didn't.

Any upcoming appointments? NIPT this afternoon. Tele appointment with my GP tomorrow. Looking forward to finding out if I need thyroid medication and what's her opinion on my 1st round of genetic screening results.

Any milestones? Or milestones you are trying to get to? (Made it to a specific week, heard baby’s heartbeat, baby bump, baby movement, etc) I've reached all my previous loss milestones a few weeks back

What are you doing to keep any worries away? I had a good talk with my fiancé and we agreed that I should actively switch to a positive mindset for this pregnancy and that preventing myself to do that won't have any benefits. So I'm repeating a few positive affirmations and talking to my baby.

GTKY: What was your childhood nickname? Mimi!

laurenmicheley

How far along are you? 12w+4d

How are you feeling (symptoms, mentally/emotionally)? I have migraine every other day. It's terrible and I'm trying to cope the best I can (peppermint oil, ice packs, rest), but I'm getting very frustrated. On a positive, looks like MS has greatly diminished, so basically traded one evil for another.

Any upcoming appointments? Friday with my OB; am supposed to get a call from them on Tuesday or Wednesday with my NIPT results.

Any milestones? Or milestones you are trying to get to? (Made it to a specific week, heard baby’s heartbeat, baby bump, baby movement, etc) Made my MC benchmarks a few weeks ago. I guess now, 2nd trimester is the next biggie followed by 20-weeks.

What are you doing to keep any worries away? Ignore them until they go away!!!! Haha, just kidding (but also kind of not). Whenever I'm worried, I really just talk to MH who is a truly reasonable person and puts things in perspective for me. I also am so thankful that I told my BFF (who had a baby in Oct 19) because she has been such a great help to me as well. 

GTKY: What was your childhood nickname? Lulu (still is with my family and MH)

surlyjaneausten

How far along are you? 10 weeks today!

How are you feeling (symptoms, mentally/emotionally)? I’m feeling pretty good! My nausea is way better unless I don’t get enough sleep or see something unappetizing. Mentally my scan last week brought so much peace of mind. 

Any upcoming appointments? My 12 week appointment in a couple weeks. Next week I’ll go in for my NIPT testing. 

Any milestones? Or milestones you are trying to get to? (Made it to a specific week, heard baby’s heartbeat, baby bump, baby movement, etc) seeing a cute little baby with a heartbeat was a huge milestone. And knowing that second trimester is on the horizon is exciting too. I try not to wish time away, but honestly first trimester with pgal brain is tough to enjoy. 

What are you doing to keep any worries away? I try to remind myself that I have no evidence that this pregnancy is anything but healthy. 

GTKY: What was your childhood nickname? I have really never had a nickname. In college my now sister in law called me Scary Carrie. My name is not Carrie, but similar 😆. 

mimser

I know what you mean @surlyjaneausten , I've caught myself wishing to fast forward to the baby being born, healthy and all, but then I'm like, wait, I want to enjoy this pregnancy too!

potofgolden

How far along are you? 11 w 4 d

How are you feeling (symptoms, mentally/emotionally)? Sometimes I have no symptoms, sometimes exhausted, nauseous, lightheadedness, crying spells
No symptoms feels great, but then it freaks me out like something is wrong.

Any upcoming appointments? May 5th... it seems so far away.

Any milestones? Or milestones you are trying to get to? (Made it to a specific week, heard baby’s heartbeat, baby bump, baby movement, etc) I felt butterflies two nights in a row, then nothing last night. I saw babies heartbeat at the 1st US. This is the week of my previous m/c. I can’t wait until this next appointment and to officially get out of the 1st Tri.

What are you doing to keep any worries away? 

I’m on progesterone so that helps put my mind at ease.
Plus it’s so much better being pregnant with a pot of gold baby than a rainbow baby. I tried not ever get my hopes up with My rainbow, which is a sad way to live. With my pot of gold baby I’m soaking in all the goodness and getting excited... which scares me even more.
Hugs to everyone, November 2020 successful birth stories here we come!

GTKY: What was your childhood nickname? BETBET 

mimser

Love the way you put it with the pot of gold @potofgolden ! Wonderful way to see it I will take example 😊

hedgepig

How far along are you? 12w5d

How are you feeling (symptoms, mentally/emotionally)? Good! The bloating and constipation and gas persist, but sometimes are better. They make be look 6 month pregnant some days 🙄

Any upcoming appointments? Wed phone appt for NIPT results 

Any milestones? Or milestones you are trying to get to? (Made it to a specific week, heard baby’s heartbeat, baby bump, baby movement, etc) I've passed my loss milestones (and the anniversary for one is this week). Just waiting for good results on Wednesday, then on to monthly appts and the A/S for reassurance. 

What are you doing to keep any worries away? Even though the yucky first tri symptoms are mostly gone, I feel pregnant now, which helps alot.

GTKY: What was your childhood nickname?  My brother (13 mo younger) called me Fifi for no reason anyone could ever figure. 

hedgepig

@mimser Sorry about the uncertain results - that would stress me out too, even though it's still almost certain that everything is ok. I am glad that you're able to start feeling more positive! 
@laurenmicheley So excited for you to get your results! Not so excited about migraines. That sucks, and I'm sorry. Is your friend super pumped about your kids being almost exactly a year apart? Does she live near by?
@surlyjaneausten I also think a lot about having no evidence that this pregnancy is anything but healthy. I can't do anything to change it, so I should just assume it's healthy. 
@potofgolden FX the next week flies by!

dumbledoredies

How far along are you? 11w1d

How are you feeling (symptoms, mentally/emotionally)? I still haven't had many symptoms which concerns me. Mentally I feel okay because I can no longer suck in my lower belly. That has to be my uterus/baby, right?!

Any upcoming appointments? This Thursday! I'm so nervous. This is the appointment where I found out baby wasn't growing last time and I have to go alone.

Any milestones? Or milestones you are trying to get to? (Made it to a specific week, heard baby’s heartbeat, baby bump, baby movement, etc) If I go to my appointment on Thursday and everything looks good I will finally be able to get excited about this baby. Then just waiting impatiently for the AS.

What are you doing to keep any worries away? I continually remind myself that there's nothing I can do to control the outcome. What will be, will be. If I go my appointment and I have a other MMC then I'll get through it like I did the first time. With copious amounts of wine.

GTKY: What was your childhood nickname? Meesh.

@mimser it's so important to try and remain positive! Which is easier said then done.

Good luck to everyone with your genetic testing results!

kelk5

How far along are you? 12 weeks today

How are you feeling (symptoms, mentally/emotionally)? I've been awful today. Can't move around without getting sick and just exhausted. My poor kiddos are not having a very exciting day, although we did make it outside for  a bit before I got sick again.

Any upcoming appointments? Monday May 4th. It's the anniversary of my nephew's death but it was the morning that worked best for my husband to watch the kids. So I'm just going to try to get through it and not worry too much that it's a bad omen. 

Any milestones? Or milestones you are trying to get to? (Made it to a specific week, heard baby’s heartbeat, baby bump, baby movement, etc). This next week is my milestone week in several ways. My MMC was at 12 weeks, May 3rd was that baby's due date, and as I mentioned it's the anniversary of my nephew's death on May 4th.

What are you doing to keep any worries away? I'm just telling myself to get through this week. My son's first birthday is May 8th so I am starting to think about his zoom cake smash party and the presents I need to wrap. Focusing on my children is what helps me the most. I'll be devastated if I lose the twins but I'm so fortunate to have my two little loves. 

GTKY: What was your childhood nickname? My dad called me Roxy when I was little. In highschool a few people called me kelk but mostly I was called by my last name in swimming.

kelk5

@dumbledoredies I hope today's appointment went well.

@potofgolden I hadn't heard that the baby after a rainbow baby is a pot of gold. I like that. That's a really good way to look at it.

I hope everyone's NIPT tests come back and are good.

hopefulmama321

How far along are you? 
10w4d

How are you feeling (symptoms, mentally/emotionally)?
Mildly nauseous all day and terrified about having another mmc

Any upcoming appointments?
next appointment at 12 weeks

Any milestones? Or milestones you are trying to get to? (Made it to a specific week, heard baby’s heartbeat, baby bump, baby movement, etc)

Heard the heartbeat last week but it really only reassured me for a day. I just keep thinking that the heartbeats until it doesn't... Foubd out about the last mc at 14 weeks, but baby was only measuring 12 weeks so I feel like I won't start to feel better until our 16 week appointment. 

What are you doing to keep any worries away? 
Coming here and reaching out to folks who have had losses and gone on to have successful pregnancies. But honestly not sure if its helping. 

GTKY: What was your childhood nickname?  
Carabean

potofgolden

@kelk5 I don’t think it’s widely known or used to call the baby after the rainbow the pot of gold baby or golden baby, but I love the idea. This pregnancy is so much more enjoyable on an emotional level than Rainbow. 

My husband bought me a necklace that looks like peas in a pod, with an Pearl -Angel Baby, Rainbow- Rainbow Baby, and Gold- Golden Baby. I helped him find it on Etsy😁!

I hope your having a good day, I know it must be a rough one today. Hugs.

kelk5

@potofgolden thanks. My parents had been strictly quarantining and so have we, so I took the kids down to their place yesterday. It was a good distraction for all of us. We couldn't get together with the rest of the family because they've had people going to work in their house. 

name1109

@mimser I’m late on asking but what does PGAL stand for? I tried to look it up and failed. I recall knowing but I am forgetting. 

mimser

@name1109 It stands for Pregnancy after loss !

name1109

@mimser thank you.  I couldn’t remember.  This is my 7th pregnancy...definitely stressed til I can feel baby girl kicking. 

dumbledoredies

I'm really struggling right now. I was finally feeling excited about this pregnancy and getting into the second trimester and now I'm having this spotting and I dont know how to relax about it. I've never had bleeding end well and I dont know how to reassure myself that everything will be fine. I was going to announce at the end of this month (around 15-16 weeks) but now I'm so nervous to announce at all. I keep telling myself that I saw the baby on Tuesday and it was moving around and looked perfectly healthy and that the chances of miscarrying this late are so small but I've always been the person that experiences those crappy tiny chances of things happening. Ugh.

And I've been somewhat avoiding the BMB because I'm so nervous to invest more time and emotions into something that could end 😫

mimser

@dumbledoredies I understand how you're feeling. I've been feeling similar while I'm on what seems like a forever wait for NIPT results. And before that, I was anxiously waiting for my 12 week ultrasound,  and before that the 8 week US. I know it's hard, but I've decided to celebrate this pregnancy, because I don't want to miss out and it's just not fair to the the baby. My fiancé said that anyway, if things were to turn bad, it would be horrible whether you invest emotions at this point or not. I'm not saying that I'm successful at this 100% of the time, but I'm really trying. I started telling a few people about this pregnancy and it actually made me feel better. And you know what, at some point the odds gotta be in our favor 😊

kelk5

@dumbledoredies hugs❤️  

laurenmicheley

@dumbledoredies I'm so sorry you are going through this. Your feelings are so incredibly valid and I think pretty normal (when I had a threatened miscarriage in my last pregnancy, I felt the same way). At a certain point, it's self-preservation. I'm really hoping everything is fine and you are able to get the reassurance that you need as soon as possible. Just know, there are internet strangers that are here for you and are rooting for you and your LO. Sending hugs and wishing you a peaceful weekend.

dumbledoredies

The words of encouragement help ❤ I want so badly to be excited about this baby

name1109

@dumbledoredies could you have a SCH pregnancy?  My friend had one with her second https://mamainstincts.com/my-sch-pregnancy-outcome/

hedgepig

@dumbledoredies Oh man, that is so hard and so unfair. Sending lots of love ❤ When is your next appt?

mia80

I just figured out what pgal stands for!

@dumbledoredies I understand how you're feeling. My husband and I struggled with infertility and this is my 3rd pregnancy in the last year. The first we were sooooooo excited, and found out we had a missed miscarriage at 12 weeks. This time we're just so nervous about everything... It feels like we're missing all the joy everyone else gets to enjoy with pregnancy. I had an appointment with my OB this week, so I know baby was good on Wed. I told my boss that day, and have 'announced' at work... But now I'm worried I have somehow jinxed it by announcing!!! (which I know makes no sense). Anyhow, that was a longwinded way of saying you're not alone in how you're feeling... I hope your spotting goes away and and you can start to relax again 🍀

potofgolden

@dumbledoredies I’ve been in your position and it sucks!! Just know we are here for you. I hope that you can let yourself feel the excitement soon.