March STM+ Check In

bluehydrangea17

Hope it is okay with everyone that I am posting this! 

EDD/Weeks + Days: 

How old is/are your other kid(s)? 

How is/are your kiddo(s) doing?

Any questions/concerns?

GTKY: Do you have a special activity planned with your kids before the baby arrives? 

bluehydrangea17

EDD/Weeks + Days: June 25th 

How old is/are your other kid(s)? DS 1 is 4 1/2 and DS 2 is 19 months 

How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? DS 1 is doing great at school. DS 2 has been throwing up all day, poor little guy.

Any questions/concerns? DS 1 Is super excited about baby but I am concerned about handling all 3 kids, especially when my husband is late from work. Anyone else getting nervous? 

GTKY: Do you have a special activity planned with your kids before the baby arrives? 

We are driving to Florida in April and we are super excited. Since we are driving, we are hoping the Coronavirus does not ruin our trip. 

hanshotfirst77

EDD/Weeks + Days: 6/21, 25 weeks today!

How old is/are your other kid(s)? DS is 5 

How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? DS is doing great in kinder. I can’t believe he will be 6 next month! Planning his first real birthday party with kids from school. 

Any questions/concerns? I just signed him up for summer camp. I was a little on the fence since maternity leave will fall over summer break to keep him home or send him to camp. I decided to go with a local town camp, enough to get him out with other kids and give baby and I some bonding time but cheap enough that I won’t feel bad keeping him home sometimes. Anyone else with older kids doing camp? Or littles still going to daycare? Or keeping them home over summer?

GTKY: Do you have a special activity planned with your kids before the baby arrives? 

Nothing yet but I would like to do something special with him. He’s been an only a long time and it’s just been us for awhile too so I’d like to do something nice. 

chaos-and-coffee

EDD/Weeks + Days: 25+5

How old is/are your other kid(s)? 16 months tomorrow 

How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? Exhausting me. Holy moly. 

Any questions/concerns? Just your general how in the world am I going to handle two crazy boys? 

GTKY: Do you have a special activity planned with your kids before the baby arrives? DS and I are doing swim lessons right now! So far either my parents of DH have came to watch, which makes DS flip, so the next four weekends are strictly DS and mom time. 

@hanshotfirst77 My DS is still going to go to daycare. 

ReneeJ2011

EDD/Weeks + Days: 24w+6d 6/22

How old is/are your other kid(s)? DS 4.5yrs

How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? He is great!  Got to feel baby brother kick for the first time which was awesome!  He is so excited and keeps asking when the baby will come out and play. 

Any questions/concerns? I mean the concern of raising 2 rowdy boys...

GTKY: Do you have a special activity planned with your kids before the baby arrives? Nothing big. We will probably go see the new Trolls when it comes out and make a day of it.  

pourmeanothermocktail

EDD/Weeks + Days: 27, 6/6

How old is/are your other kid(s)? 3.5 and 18 months

How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? Big kid is doing alright, I'm hoping spring arriving in the next few weeks help his stir crazy cabin fever self. I can't really bring kids outside until our patio furniture is out so I can sit. 18 month old is getting evaluated for speech and sensory stuff tomorrow, no words is super frustrating and super picky eating has gotten out of control.

Any questions/concerns? A 21 month (from 2 to 3) and 48 month (from 1 to 3)  gap just isn't long enough. 

Also, oldest is in preschool, which ends of the year about a week before I anticipate baby. We don't have the ability to do daycare or camps or any paid activities for kids this summer, so it's going to be chaotic.

GTKY: Do you have a special activity planned with your kids before the baby arrives? I wish. Maybe we can take big kid to his first movie if we can find the right one. The toddler just likes being with people-everything is special to her still. 

brose1117

EDD/Weeks + Days: 25w5d 6/16💙

How old is/are your other kid(s)? 5 in May & just turned 2

How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? They are exhausting me! We are so ready for warmer weather. Today the weather was so nice and we basically spent the entire day outside, it was amazing to just let them run and get some of their crazy out. 

Any questions/concerns? I’m feeling sad about DS1 being the oldest of 3, and just turning 5. I know how much responsibility will naturally be out on his shoulders and I hate that. I’m hoping being conscious of it, will help me rely on him less. 🤞🏻 And i get sad when i look at DS2 and picture him as a big brother soon. He’s just still so my baby and I don’t want to rush his growing up. I know I’m giving them a gift, but I just feel sad about making them grow. 

GTKY: Do you have a special activity planned with your kids before the baby arrives? No, but, I’ve been trying to focus more on taking time to cuddle my oldest in quiet moments where DS2 is resting and it’s just us. I’m also planning on taking him on a mom and son date at least 2 times before babe, maybe movie and lunch? He will be ecstatic, and we need the time for him to just be center of attention! 

@hanshotfirst77 DS1 will be out of preschool last week of May and then the boys will be home with me all summer until he starts Kindergarten in September. How is my baby going to be in Kindergarten in just months?!? 😭 I’m so ready for the space as well as so not ready for him to be gone so much. 

For everyone nervous about raising two boys, don’t be! We are about to have our third boy and honestly I’m excited because i love watching my two so much! Yes they bicker, yes they wrestle ALOT! But mostly they just are obsessed with each other and love each other so much. DS2 constantly asks for DS1 if he’s sleeping or at preschool. It’s one of my favorite things. ☺️

@pourmeanothermocktail good luck! My DS1 was delayed speaking, my dr was okay waiting until 2.5 to start any therapy and literally at 2.5 he opened his mouth and had full sentences and large words, it was crazy and unexpected and made me feel so much better! At nearly five now, we literally cannot get him to shut his mouth! 🙈😂 DS2 just turned 2 a couple weeks ago and is also delayed in speech. I’m trusting in DS1’s process but it’s very difficult and frustrating. I remember DS1 constantly being frustrated and I know DS2 is frustrated. It results in a lot of fits. I don’t know if not doing therapy is the right move for us, but it’s the path I’m following for now. I applaud you for looking into options. I hope it helps. The fits are very very challenging and make me feel like I’m drowning, especially as my mama guilt kicks in because i know he’s feeling similar. I just hate it all. 

chaos-and-coffee

@brose1117 that is so sweet about your boys asking for each other! I’ll admit there was a tiny twinge of omg/sadness when I found out I was going to have two boys, but I’m so excited for the brother bond they’re going to have. 

hanshotfirst77

@brose1117 I had that seem feeling last year right before my DS started kinder. They grow up so fast. But as much as I miss him being my little baby(even though he always will be) It's also fun and exciting watching him get older and do more things. He has learned a lot in kinder this year. He's practically reading already and his writing is way improved. You'll be amazed at all the stuff he will bring home from school. 

FigTreeMama

EDD/Weeks + Days: June 4 / 27 weeks + 4 days

How old is/are your other kid(s)? DD1 is 2 years + 3 months 

How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? So good. I really love this age, every week she has some fun new thing going on, some catch phrase or song or being able to jump or getting into more imaginative play. 

GTKY: Do you have a special activity planned with your kids before the baby arrives? 

I know this is a cheesy thing to say, but I feel like every day that she gets to be our “only” is so special. Will we ever get this quality time again?

@hanshotfirst77 We will be leaving our toddler in daycare, it seems like it will help to just keep her in her routine rather than pulling her out for a couple of months and then putting her back in. I also think it will help in terms of bonding and acclimating to having two kids. The newborn phase was not kind to us last time so I am expecting it to be really difficult again and think this will just be one less thing. 

alli392

@brose1117 and @pourmeanothermocktail
my brother also got all sorts of testing for a speech delay. Turns out his older siblings knew him so well we were doing things for him without him asking! Somewhere around 3 he started to really branch out once we backed off 🤦🏻‍♀️ It’s stressful but most of the time by the students I work with in middle school, you can’t even tell it was once an issue!

runwmusic

EDD/Weeks + Days:  6/1, 28 weeks

How old is/are your other kid(s)? 15 months 

How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? He's insane but good. So much energy!!! 

Any questions/concerns? Nothing that hasn't been said already. We wanted two close in age and now I'm wondering how my baby is going to be a big brother. I feel bad we won't get more time together just us. 

GTKY: Do you have a special activity planned with your kids before the baby arrives? Not really. He's so young he doesn't have any idea what's coming and I feel bad about that. 

@hanshotfirst77 ds will continue daycare. For one, there's no way I could manage, but also we would lose his spot.

@brose1117 I have been feeling sad that ds wont be the baby anymore. I know he won't be a baby forever but it just feels too soon 💔

pourmeanothermocktail

@brose1117 My oldest will be oldest of 3 as well, and will turn 4 just after baby arrives. My soon-to-be-middle won't be 2 until a couple of months later.

My husband has a speech difficulty, my oldest was in speech therapy for a full year and a month before he turned 3 and then started at a special needs preschool this fall to make sure his speech stays on schedule. My second has LESS expressive speech than her brother did at this age. It's really hard, she throws fits for 30 + min when she doesn't get what she wants, but I frequently have no idea what she wants, plus seems to have some serious sensory issues leading to an extremely limited menu, etc. So while I hate the idea of even contemplating therapy again, especially with me being currently disabled which just makes even trying to participate in therapy worse (and having people into your home that aren't close family/friends when you have a newborn is awful as well, just awful!), and knowing that every time the therapist comes over, the dogs will explode loudly and the baby will wake, even if it's the first time they've slept in hours....

Ugh. I hate therapy. I loathe it, even while recognizing the usefulness. But newborn stage has always been super difficult here (anyone else have only had colicky screaming babies who don't sleep more than 2 hours at a time until they're at least 4 months old? And only take 20 min naps?) and having any sort of appointment on a schedule is just painful to me. 

My biggest concern is if she does have serious sensory or speech issues (and I know she has a pretty rough lip tie that was never addressed) and I'm going to need to do something about therapy before baby is at least 6 months old. But I need to at least know, because only having a diet of 10 things (she won't touch fruit OR veggies, or most meat), and throwing fits over every single meal is really starting to wear me out too. I want a meal (and 4 total are served in this house daily) where there just isn't a fight....trying to parent without carrying kids or walking is enough of an awful challenge. 

brose1117

@pourmeanothermocktail i hope you didn’t take my message as passing judgment, I absolutely didn’t intend it that way! I was just trying to say, I understand! And that I’m glad you’re taking steps you feel necessary to help. I certainly look forward to the day that all day isn’t a constant melt down, one after another. It’s really hard and draining. 

The newborn stage has never been a good stage in my house either. 👎🏻 I’m hopeful this time is easier, just because i so want to enjoy those moments with our last. Naive, i know. But a girl can dream 🙈😂

hayhay2501

EDD/Weeks + Days: 26 weeks, 2 days

How old is/are your other kid(s)? DD is 3

How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? She’s good. Still pretty difficult but talking up a storm and saying pretty funny things. She’s excited about the baby but I know she has no idea what’s in store!!

GTKY: Do you have a special activity planned with your kids before the baby arrives? : Not really but we’ve crammed A LOT into her 3 years so I don’t think she really needs a special activity hah.

@hanshotfirst77 DD goes to full time preschool/ daycare hybrid and were going to keep her there full time. I think it’ll be a lot easier on her to not interrupt her routine. Not to mention will help us get through the newborn phase!

alli392

Finally getting on here and getting caught up!

EDD/Weeks + Days: 26+3 (this 24-28 week stretch is going soooo slow-how is it not third tri already?)

How old is/are your other kid(s)? Almost two!!

How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? She’s great-she likes to feel baby kick (aka I flex my abs muscles) and give baby kisses and it melts my heart 😊 she’s really reaching that point where the world is opening up to her and I love interacting with new things to show her!

Any questions/concerns? Starting to get nervous about labor after such a rough go last time. Everything looks so much better than last time and I know we know so much more about how my body works and how to prepare specially for what I’ll need, but still nervous. 

GTKY: Do you have a special activity planned with your kids before the baby arrives? 

Not really-she doesn’t quite get it yet. I’m sure we’ll do some family time towards the end to be out last days as a family of three but too broke to do anything too special. 

I’m starting to get really sentimental with my time with just her though for sure. Any time I have to rock her to sleep (two year old molars we think 😭) I just cuddle her before putting her down. And it’s getting harder to put her down each time. Where’d my baby go and how will it be when she’s not my only anymore? Gah-going to make myself cry thinking about it. 

Mikki62

EDD/Weeks + Days: 26w 6d

How old is/are your other kid(s)? 
DD 7 and DS 5
How is/are your kiddo(s) doing?
They are really excited to finally be getting a little sister. Have been asking for a long time. 
Any questions/concerns? No

GTKY: Do you have a special activity planned with your kids before the baby arrives? I do want to do something but am not quite sure what yet. Definitely some one on one time with both of them.

runwmusic

@alli392 i have been in the same boat getting ds down at night. I just can't believe he won't be THE baby anymore. He's still my baby 😭😭😭

kyrwyn

EDD/Weeks + Days: 25 June (24+5)

How old is/are your other kid(s)? 2 + almost 4 months. I love this age so far. 

How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? He's amazing.  He's so excited about being a big brother, and we've been really focusing on getting his big boy room set up (which I why I've been around here less. Manual labor = tired K). My dad and stepmom (Papa and Yaya) came over several times this weekend to help with the work and he can't stop chatting about how we all worked on his room TOGETHER.  His bestie also just got a little sister, and he asks constantly about Geoffy's baby sister Lily.  I'm hoping some of this enthusiasm will persist through the reality of having a baby brother, but it's nice so far that he's excited about the prospect. 

Any questions/concerns? How do you survive the newborn no sleep stage with an older kid (very active)? I think this is just a hypothetical/pre-emptive whine, since I expect every family answers this differently. 

GTKY: Do you have a special activity planned with your kids before the baby arrives?  I'm trying to work in as many fun things as I have time and energy for, and also get family and friends on board and scheduled for taking Big Brother out for fun activities once baby gets here. That way he'll have some one-on-one time with his favorite people still, and I'll get a break from adventure toddler plus baby. I've been really lucky to get to spend as much time with him while he's this little as I have -- it certainly wasn't what we'd planned -- and I'm feeling a bit guilty that I'll be job searching as soon as I feel able once baby 2 gets here.  DH and I are brainstorming how to make one-on-one time happen for each kid, and also family time, when we're both working full time again. 

chaos-and-coffee

@kyrwyn no advice on the sleep because same boat here, but I remember wondering how I was going to do it the first time and people kept telling me you just do. I had no idea how I was going to function at work when DS was up 3+ times a night...but I just did. I don’t have the answers but at least we’ll all be right there with you! 

pourmeanothermocktail

My only answer was my husband getting up with toddler overnight, because I won't be at the beck and call of two beasts at night.

I have one friend who they split the night, so mom handles bedtime until whatever time, and dad handles from that time until wake- giving both parents 4 or 5 hours free per night, and still have other friends who do 3 nights in a row all duties, then 3 nights off all duties, and alternate sunday night or whatever. 

Just to give a few ideas for different family situations. 

alli392

@kyrwyn DD will be DHs responsibility from the moment she’s up until the moment before he leaves for work and the moment he’s home until the moment I do bedtime with her (because I love that time). She’ll get lots of one on one time with me during the day so she’ll have dad time whenever he can. Then I can focus on baby during those times instead of juggling. In the evening once DD is in bed, DH will have baby so I can sleep as much as possible while he’s still awake. He doesn’t wake up to anything during the night so once he goes to bed, it’s all me. It’ll be a hard few months while sleep regulates since it won’t be much time together but he’s actually excited for that schedule that gets him one on one time with both his girls as he put it. As far as during the day while he’s gone, I guess we‘Ll have to take it one hour at a time. Lots of baby carrying for the newest little

kjack86

EDD/Weeks + Days: June 19 / 25+5

How old is/are your other kid(s)? 17 months

How is/are your kiddo(s) doing? He’s doing great, though I am starting to get a little frustrated with his lack of words. I’m not overly concerned with the delay in speech as he babbles constantly and follows verbal directions very well, but sometimes I wish he could just tell me exactly what he wants. Sounds like there are a few others in the same boat!

Any questions/concerns? My son (weaned since 11 months) has recently started wanting to look down my shirt and I’m wondering if he’s going to get very interested in my boobs again once I start nursing baby sister. Obviously he sees mine regularly and I’m not worried about him being curious, but I also don’t want him trying to check out everyone else’s rack lol. Any others experience this with older siblings?

GTKY: Do you have a special activity planned with your kids before the baby arrives? I don’t have anything in particular planned, though we may try to hit the zoo and a few other fun things before the baby comes. As an only child, he gets to do some “special” just about every weekend!