GTKY: STM+ — The Bump
October 2020 Moms

GTKY: STM+

I know it’s still early, but I thought I’d start a Get To Know You thread for second time moms (and more!). Being pregnant with other kids at home brings unique challenges, so here’s a place to vent/get advice/freak out if you need to. 

How far along are you? 

Age(s) of other kid(s)? 

Any worries you have? 
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Re: GTKY: STM+

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  • How far along are you? 
    4w4d
    Age(s) of other kid(s)? 
    6 DD and (almost) 5 DS
    Any worries you have?
    All of the worries.  My first two are 21 months apart.  This gap is going to be huge.  We've moved since they were infants, so finding a new, reliable childcare is daunting.  I guess fitting three carseats in my car is something I should think about.  Our house is only 3 bedrooms, so who is bunking together? I got to use my favorite kid names already, so what the heck am I naming this one? I have gotten rid of everything, so what did I actually use last time? 

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker


    Pregnancy Ticker
    tdevlindryeMJDsquaredcmessamorebabycakesday
  • I am 5+1 with a 14-mo boy. I am actually most worried about telling my family. My sibs are 3.5 years and nearly 8 years apart (little sis was a surprise!) and I already know that my mom is going to have A LOT to say about babies just under 2 years apart. 😩
    MJDsquaredcmessamoreSmelh324babycakesday
  • How far along are you? 4+3 according to LMP but I think I ovulated late 

    Age(s) of other kid(s)?  DS is 21 months 

    Any worries you have?  Just overall concerned about how I’m going to handle two 
    Me: 27 DH: 27
    Married 6/15/13
    BFP #1 5/8/16, EDD 12/31/16- DD born 9/10/16 at 24 weeks 
    ~In our hearts forever~
    BFP #2 10/14/17, EDD 7/1/18


    MJDsquaredtdevlindryecmessamorebabycakesday
  • MJDsquaredMJDsquared member
    edited February 6
    How far along are you?
    4+5 basd on LMP

    Age(s) of other kid(s)?
    2

    Any worries you have?
    Aside from just parenting two kids in general, I'm a little nervous about finances. We only do daycare 2 days a week though we both work full time, but I'm still scared of 2 in daycare. On top of that, our older car is a little Civic (no car payment) and ideally we want to replace it with a larger vehicle and that's even more financial stress. (ETA This being aside from my trigger warning type worries about the pregnancy being viable.)
    Me: 29 || DH: 29
    TTC #1 4/2016 || dx NIR PCOS 7/2016 || BFP 4/2017
    DD - 12/28/17 <3

    TTC #2 3/2019
    BFP 5/2019 || MC - D&C 5/2019
    BFP 2/2020 || EDD 10/10/2020
    cmessamorebabycakesday
  • How far along are you? 5+2 I believe

    Age(s) of other kid(s)? 19 mo

    Any worries you have?
    Where do I start??H and I are only children. We never thought we would have two but last year we started talking more and more about it. We moved to a bigger house last spring but now I am of course wondering if it's already too small because I work from home and need the 3rd bedroom all the time! like @MJDsquared the cost of daycare worries me too. We have a nanny now and were planning to transition DS to preschool in the summer but now all the places we like have waitlists. Do we pay a nanny instead? He needs socialization! How much does it cost?? We need to be gentle with big transitions! There, queueing all my anxieties right here  :D Of course I won't stop worrying about this baby being viable until first US but ultimately I learned that you never stop worrying regardless and that there's always going to be something. So might as well try to keep fears at bay as much as possible.

    tdevlindryeMJDsquaredcmessamorebabycakesday
  • How far along are you? Currently 5weeks 5 days

    Age(s) of other kid(s)? DD is 18 months

    Any worries you have? We were NTNP but somehow this is a surprise to me. I'm worried I won't be able to love this baby as the one outside of my body. Like @[email protected] I am worried about the cost of daycare which can easily climb into the $3000 range in my area. I am worried about the first trimester sleepiness that has kicked in hard. I'm worried that it will stop me from being a good mom to DD in the next few months.
    BigBadWolf12MJDsquaredcmessamorebabycakesday
  • How far along are you? 4+6 based on lmp, but I'm guessing a few days shy of that 

    Age(s) of other kid(s)? 4 son

    Any worries you have? 
    *I won't be able to give my son the attention he want and has gotten very used to
    *I won't be able to give the baby the attention s/he deserves
    *The kid will be a terror because I've gotten off way too easy with my son and there is no way that is going to happen twice
    *Childcare - finding the right provider since the amazing daycare provider we had for our son is closing up shop next month to help her husband with his business which is apparently taking off - I'm happy for them...really, I am...
    *Money and housing
    *I'll be taking time off work during busy season
    *I'm not covered by FMLA/CFRA because my company is so small
    *Having another failed induction
    *Having pre-eclampsia and a breech baby again
    *Having a girl
    *Trying for a VBAC, failing, then having another emergency C-section
    *And now I'm worried about worrying too much 
    MJDsquaredcmessamorebabycakesday
  • @aztecash
    so many similarities here:

    *attention to both babies - so hard. I hear your heart expands but need to be there to know for sure!
    *The kid will be a terror because I've gotten off way too easy with my son and there is no way that is going to happen twice - THIS! My son is a handful but he's overall such an easy baby!
    *Childcare, Money and housing - OBVI
    *I'll be taking time off work during busy season - SAME. 
    *I'm not covered by FMLA/CFRA because my company is so small - SAME! It was doable with 1 child but 2...I am looking at 2 months unpaid if I want to take some decent leave
    *Having a girl - so many feelings about this too!

    cmessamoretdevlindryebabycakesday
  • How far along are you? 5 weeks, or 5+1? 

    Age(s) of other kid(s)? 3 and almost 16 months, both boys

    Any worries you have? Maintaining my sanity? My 3 year old is going through a particularly tantrummy time, and I'm just really hoping that I can handle it all. My patience has been running pretty thin lately and I start freaking out when I think about having a newborn in the mix too. At least by the time this kid comes along, the kids will be 4 and 2, so maybe the 4 year old will be a little bit more reasonable? 







    cmessamoretdevlindryeSmelh324babycakesday
  • AB518AB518 member
    How far along are you? 3+6

    Age(s) of other kid(s)? 2.5 year old son

    Any worries you have? I work a lot, so I am always worried that I won't be giving my kids enough attention.  Also, I'm worried that I won't have the energy to be a good mom.
    Pregnancy Ticker
    cmessamoretdevlindryebabycakesday
  • How far along are you? 5 Weeks 1 Day- Due October 8th

    Age(s) of other kid(s)? 3 DD(this month) and 5 DD

    Any worries you have? Increasing my anxiety! I feel like I already get pretty stressed with both of them when things aren't going smoothly, though I really try to stay calm. So throwing a crying baby in to the mix will be hard.
    cmessamorebabycakesday
  • @kmalls yes about drop-off! I always told my husband no way to a third kid due to this reason alone, yet here we are. My DH has to be at work between 5 and 7 am daily, just varies by what they have going on, but I am always on my own in the morning. And oldest DD starts Kindergarten soon so that means we actually have a specific time to be out the door and that scares the crap out of me! It will be so much earlier than we are used to leaving.
    babycakesday
  • @smg2302 laughing at everything you said. I chose to write my initial post before reading everyone else's and now i'm like oh yes to that yes to that. The 3 carseats, the bunking up, and giving away all my baby stuff lol. Ok at least we all have the same problems.
    smg2302
  • How far along are you? 4w 0d

    Age(s) of other kid(s)? DD is 8

    Any worries you have? I lost a set of twins at 20 weeks last year due to an Incompetent cervix so I'm extremely nervous of everything
    cmessamoredolewhipperbabycakesdaybritneeh
  • @Cosmomom129 I can imagine your worry, but sending lots of good vibes your way!
    @homeport17 *TW* I also has a CP before my son and it hit me more than I thought it ever would. It was unplanned meaning we were just DUMB and rolled the dice, and it happened at a really bad time (I was extremely stressed due to my demanding job which I have changed in the meantime). Nevertheless it shattered me and it took me a while to get back to normal. *end TW*

     I can see how it's a difficult choice whether to tell your DD or wait
    homeport17Cosmomom129
  • My son was a fuss this AM. Why are toddlers so incredibly irrational??
    cmessamore
  • @morethanamama, I feel that. We survived on a 10 minute car nap yesterday. I literally counted down to bedtime 
    Me: 27 DH: 27
    Married 6/15/13
    BFP #1 5/8/16, EDD 12/31/16- DD born 9/10/16 at 24 weeks 
    ~In our hearts forever~
    BFP #2 10/14/17, EDD 7/1/18


  • How far along are you? 5w + 6

    Age(s) of other kid(s)? DD 3.5 yrs

    Any worries you have? 
    -I really, REALLY want to TOLC/VBAC. I don't want another emergency c/s.
    -My husband. He's extremely anxious and doesn't deal well on little sleep. Adding another kid to the mix should be interesting; I'm usually the lighthouse in his stormy waters. 
    -I know this probably sounds silly, but how I will deal with a crazy preschooler and a baby at Disney (we try to go weekly)
    -My job. I'm being reassigned to a new property and they don't know I'm pregnant yet. I don't want to risk this new opportunity. 
    Me: 32 | H: 33
    Married March 7, 2015
    BFP#1: Nov 2015 | DD: July 2016
    BFP#2: Jan 2019 | Ectopic, Loss of Tube
    BFP#3: Jan 2020 | EDD: 10/5


    Smelh324babycakesdaycmessamore
  • -5w3 days
    -DS is 4
    -so much anxiety- afraid of another loss
    -Nervous about telling work, and when to tell work.
    -I’m on lovenox injections and I’m running out of non-bruised places to do the shots. 
    -nervous my house will be even more of a disaster
    -anxious about having another c-section, I want to avoid it but am also not willing to go past 39 weeks because of my clotting disorder
    Me: 29, DH: 29
    TTC since: 2/13
    Long, anovulatory cycles
    Began fertility testing 12/13
    Ultrasound and bloodwork: Everything looks good (according to my ob/gyn)
    HSG: waiting to schedule
    SA: scheduled with RE for 1/6/14
    babycakesday
  • How far along are you? 4 weeks

    Age(s) of other kid(s)? DD1 is 5, DD2 is 3

    Any worries you have? Probably laughable, but I’m worried about fitting 3 car seats in our cars 😂
    Smelh324babycakesdaybritneeh
  • @coldbrew not silly at all! It's a lot even if you have a large car. Are you going the minivan route?
  • @coldbrew, not silly at all! This baby will be my second at home with me and I’m already concerned about that. 

    @[email protected] I love your sn and the fact you go to Disney weekly! 

    @[email protected], I’m sorry you are experiencing so much anxiety. PGAL is a mind fuck. 
    Me: 27 DH: 27
    Married 6/15/13
    BFP #1 5/8/16, EDD 12/31/16- DD born 9/10/16 at 24 weeks 
    ~In our hearts forever~
    BFP #2 10/14/17, EDD 7/1/18


    dolewhipper
  • @coldbrew the carseat stress is real!

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker


    Pregnancy Ticker
    coldbrewmorethanamamabritneeh
  • @morethanamama I have an SUV and could probably swing 3 if I bought smaller ones, but we shall see.

    @profmcgonagall I’m glad I’m not alone!
  • @coldbrew
    1. My screen name on my last baby board was CoffeeOnIce so I'm feeling ya on the beverage choices, I kind of miss it.
    2. My friend yesterday showed up to the Oscar's girls night and said she had all 3 of her carseats in the back of her HONDA ACCORD. Hey, I drive a honda accord!! So if she can fit them in that, maybe our cars have a lot more potential than we think haha. She has 2 Diono's and a Graco infant seat. I'm going to do more research and come back to ya'll on this sedan fitting 3 seats thing.
    smg2302babycakesday
  • How far along are you?
    4+6
    Age(s) of other kid(s)?
    DS is 4
    Any worries you have? 
    I mentioned on the intro page, I’m stressed about finding a new OB, mine retired from delivering babies about a year after DS was born. I’m working up the nerve to call for his recommendations even though I haven’t had an appointment in way too long.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    cmessamore
  • How far along are you?
    5+1 
    Age(s) of other kid(s)?
    DD is 4.5, DS will be 2 on the 20th
    Any worries you have? 
    Mainly childcare and just juggling it all. Our schedule is all over the place...I work 30 hours a week, but only 2 days a week in the office because my commute is an 1:15 each way. DD is staying at PreK another year next year so we will still need childcare...which is my mom and MIL, and not sure they can handle 3. I think we'll work it all out though...
    Furbaby (Oscar) | 12/9/2010
    DD | 7/3/2015 
    DS | 2/20/2018
    LO#3 | EDD: 10/11/2020 TEAM GREEN!
    cmessamore
  • How far along are you? 5w + 6

    Age(s) of other kid(s)? DD 3.5 yrs

    Any worries you have? 
    -I really, REALLY want to TOLC/VBAC. I don't want another emergency c/s.
    -My husband. He's extremely anxious and doesn't deal well on little sleep. Adding another kid to the mix should be interesting; I'm usually the lighthouse in his stormy waters. 
    -I know this probably sounds silly, but how I will deal with a crazy preschooler and a baby at Disney (we try to go weekly)
    -My job. I'm being reassigned to a new property and they don't know I'm pregnant yet. I don't want to risk this new opportunity. 
    So jealous you're local!! We are not (NJ) but we try to go twice a year. We brought my daughter when she was almost 3 (went in May, she turned 3 that July) and my son was 10w. By far our most hectic trip but still totally doable!! 
    Furbaby (Oscar) | 12/9/2010
    DD | 7/3/2015 
    DS | 2/20/2018
    LO#3 | EDD: 10/11/2020 TEAM GREEN!
    dolewhipper
  • r_kr_k member
    edited February 11
    How far along are you? 4w,5d (I think... will need to confirm at ultrasound since my periods had been irregular)

    Age(s) of other kid(s)? daughter, 8 months

    Any worries you have? We were not trying to conceive so this came as a BIG surprise.  I am really concerned about them being so close in age and keeping my sanity while working full time.  I'm also afraid of not being able to give my daughter all the attention she needs and deserves while still at such a young age.  It makes me sad that I'm afraid that I won't get to enjoy just time with her for much longer.  I know we will love her little brother or sister very much but I've been having a hard time being excited just yet.  And then I feel guilty about not being excited...  
    babycakesdaycmessamore
  • 6 weeks tomorrow. 

    Son - 8 years old 

    I’m nervous about going full term. I go see doc this Friday for confirmation. I’ve taken 4 tests though and the last was positive as soon as I peed on it. We’ve been trying to conceive for like 2 years now and I am diabetic, so things have been a little rocky. I just hope everything goes well and we have a healthy baby in October. Our so is soooo excited for a sibling. I can’t wait. :) I’ve had a miscarriage the year before I got pregnant with our son, so that’s a big concern in the first trimester for me. 
    MJDsquaredbabycakesdaycmessamore
  • How far along are you? 3w 5d, so early still

    Age(s) of other kid(s)? 11 month old son

    Any worries you have?
    Since I’m so early I’m mostly worried about this pregnancy sticking around. Fingers crossed!

    I’m also worried about making out current house work with 2 kids. I love our house, but it’s very small and space is tight with 1 kiddo, so I can only imagine 2.
    babycakesdaymorethanamamacmessamore
  • How far along are you? 4 weeks 5 days

    Age(s) of other kid(s)? 3 DD

    Any worries you have? 
    I share so many of the same worries as all of you. Time, fitting in our house, fitting in our car. 
    I had PPD after my DD and I’m terrified of how I will handle that with two LOs. I don’t do well with the lack of sleep and I’m terrified for the little sleep I’m going to get after the baby comes. I mean I’m wide awake at 3:40am already so I’m losing sleep already. 😴 

    @dolewhipper we’ll have to talk about any tips for Disney! We’re taking DD for her 4th birthday this summer. It’ll also be my DH first time. 
    dolewhipperSmelh324morethanamamacmessamore
  • @babycakesday Be gentle on yourself with the PPD. PND (prenatal depression) is a real thing, too, and if you think you might be on edge, maybe ask your hubby or a close friend you see often to look for signs. It happened to my best friend and once she got the help she needed, her pregnancy was so much easier on her. 
    And I'm always all ears for Disney! If you need anything (tips, a travel agent recommendation-they're services are free, tricks) just send me a PM!
    Me: 32 | H: 33
    Married March 7, 2015
    BFP#1: Nov 2015 | DD: July 2016
    BFP#2: Jan 2019 | Ectopic, Loss of Tube
    BFP#3: Jan 2020 | EDD: 10/5


    morethanamama
  • How far along are you? 6w today

    Age(s) of other kid(s)? 5yo son aka the love of my whole life and my Disney partner!

    Any worries you have? I feel so good right now that it’s scaring me. We were TTC for 1.5yr and had really given up on conceiving naturally. We’re not married (my son is from my previous marriage) so weren’t going the IVF route until marriage came. Had my first u/s yesterday but too soon to hear a heart beat. I want to be so excited but I’m still in shock and nervous that something could go wrong. Waiting on hcg blood results from yesterday and we’ll repeat next week then another u/s in 2 weeks. Maybe then I’ll start to calm down a little. 

    Also. Nervous about sharing the love with another baby. My son is my world! But everyone says it just happens. 
    MJDsquaredmorethanamamababycakesday
  • How far along? 4+2

    ages of other kids? DD-almost 4 DS-almost 1 (bdays are three days apart in March) 

    Worries? much closer age gap this time. Two under two feels a bit intimidating. Every fiber of my being is hoping to just see one baby in the first ultra sound. If I see two I will probably pass out on the spot.  Also stressing about needing a new vehicle that fits three car seats! 

    @mammatoomc FX for all things to go well. Happy for your BFP! Don’t worry about sharing your love. Your heart just grows and grows. Watching the sibling bond is amazing! 

    @babycakesday I suffered through horrible PPD with my first daughter. I didn’t go see a dr until she was 8 months old. We waited 3 years to have another becuase I was so afraid of the PPD. I took my meds through most of my second pregnancy(except third tri) and then started them again the exact day my son was born. This time has been so much better since I was more aware of how my PPD present itself and being proactive to talk to my doctors about it Through the whole pregnancy. Let me know if you need any support. 
    Smelh324babycakesdaymdfarmchick
  • Our nanny reminded me she does NOT have Monday off for President's Day...which means H and I get a day to ourselves! Lunch and a movie here we come!
    MJDsquareddolewhippermdfarmchickmkp0903
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