Moms of Multiples - January

ruby696

What's on your mind?

louessbee

I'm not feeling a ton of movement yet, but when I do feel flutters and pokes, they're all on one side. At the AS that baby was wild and the other one was calm... I wonder if that's a harbinger of what's to come 😂

ruby696

@louessbee It might be! For me, baby boy just kind of stretches and adjusts and baby girl is wild. I'm pretty sure it won't change after they're born. 😂

jkr2019

We bought a minivan and received all of our car seats for the triplets! But my husband and I were playing around with how we are going to position the seats and I’m realizing just how hard it is going to be for me to load all 4 kids in the van by myself. Worried about being isolated and unable to get out of the house. Also feeling a lot of pressure about weeks 20 through 24. It would be devastating to make it this far only to lose them before we get to viability. We have our NICU tour scheduled for beginning of February and I just want to fast forward through January. Sorry just realized this is kind of a downer post!  On the upside the minivan is really cool and I am having the baby shower in three weeks! 

ruby696

@jkr2019 We just bought a Suburban and will also have four car seats. Luckily DS will be 5, so he can buckle himself and help DD, who will be 4. But the thought of going put with four on my own is definitely intimidating. Re: viability, I find that stressful too. Are you able to differentiate babies by movement with three? At least with twins, I can tell who is moving. I feel like that would be harder to figure out with three.

queenklau

@jkr2019, my SIL (the one with triplet boys) had 4 car seats, one booster and an older kid in her minivan. While it is true that they didn't go out much at the beginning, she managed to load the 4 little ones by herself. I believe that there are certain hacks that makes it much easier than it seems. I'll find out how she did it initially.

allie456

@jkr2019 I've been really worried about the last four weeks till viability too. Stupidly I read a memoir that was otherwise amazing that involved late loss (Ariel Levy's The Rules Do Not Apply) and, well, I brought that anxiety upon myself. 

I can feel the boy moving more easily than the girl @ruby696 but I think that has more to do with the placenta's placement than anything. 

We started cleaning out the guest room this week that will eventually be the nursery for both babies -- mostly getting rid of books we had been storing there -- it felt really great to be taking a positive step towards parenting them. We have a lot more to do including disassembling the furniture and taking it to the attic, painting and setting up the babies' furniture but at least we got started.

louessbee

@jkr2019 Not a downer, definitely something that's on my mind as well (and many of ours in general,  it  seems). I just keep reminding myself to take deep breaths. But woo for minivan!

wabash15

Dirty Lurker****
    MoM can do ANYTHING (mostly because its not a choice not to). getting out of the house does take preparation and planning but you will get it down.  Remember it doesn't have to be pretty, someone may be fussing but you can do this. schedules are also super helpful for facilitating getting out of the house/getting stuff done.
      Your bodies are amazing growing more than one at once. You can do this.

jkr2019

Thanks everyone. @ruby696 I do feel kicks in different spots but nothing consistent yet. @allie456 congrats on starting your nursery set up! Has anyone seen the National Geographic multiples in the womb special? We just ordered it on Amazon. Can’t wait till it arrives! 

jkr2019

Has anyone else heard outnumbered by dermot Kennedy because I feel like it was written for moms of multiples.  I cry every time I hear it. 

allie456

@jkr2019 I have not heard that but I will keep an ear out!

does anyone have any book recommendations for parenting baby twins? I've done it before with singletons but I'm feeling like I need advice for two at once.

ruby696

@allie456 No book recommendations, but I'm interested to hear if anyone else know of one. Then again, therapy might be more helpful. 😆

Has anyone started really upping their protein intake? I've started drinking a daily protein shake to help me get more, but that was based off recommendations from the Dr. Luke book. I'm not sure if anyone else is worried about protein?

m6agua

@ruby696 I'm not worried about protein, but I do try take collagen in my coffee or other hot drink almost every day. I did it before pregnancy and I really notice a difference in my hair, skin, and nails when taking it.

ruby696

I've heard collagen is really helpful @m6agua. I've seen it at Costco. I should try some.

m6agua

@ruby696 I get the Vital Proteins brand at Costco, I've been slowly trying to switch over to grass fed beef, so I spring for the higher quality collagen. I've tried their marine based collagen, but I didn't notice as many of the benefits.

Also sorry to intrude on the MOM thread, just thought it may be helpful information.

ruby696

@m6agua No worries and thanks for the info! 

Eta: I have to admit, I did get really excited for a minute thinking I'd missed that you were having twins. 😂

allie456

I haven't specifically tried to up my protein intake but I am slightly concerned that I can eat so little at a time due to heartburn and generally feeling like I have no room. I mean the babies seem to be growing ok so maybe it's fine? but I must be eating fewer calories a day than I did before I got pregnant. A protein shake is probably a really good idea.

jkr2019

I am definitely trying to up my protein. I work in a medical office and we have a dietitian on staff, so I got to pick her brain. She thought the numbers in the Dr. Luke book were too high for someone my size (Arnold Schwarzenegger ate 250 grams of protein at the height of his body building and that’s what they recommend for triplet moms!) but thought I should definitely be trying to hit 150 grams per day. I struggle to drink the ensure boosters though. They activate my gag reflex even though I do not think they taste bad. Putting them in the freezer, not until frozen just slushy, helps? I dip a cliff bar in peanut butter as a high protein snack at least one time per day because that gets you 20 grams without being too filling. Protein special K cereal is another favorite. My MFM is not concerned as long as I’m gaining weight though. 

ruby696

@jkr2019 Costco has premixed protein drinks by Premier Protein. I've only had the peaches and cream flavor, but it's actually not bad as long as it's cold. Plus, it has 30 grams of protein. I drink one right before bed. The Cliff bar in peanut butter is brilliant. I'll have to try that.

rox7777

*also lurking*

My OB recommended ensure since I’ve failed to gain more than 5lbs this pregnancy. I can’t stomach it for whatever reason, BUT the breakfast carnation rich chocolate tastes just like chocolate milk and it’s tolerable. I want to say it has 21-23g of protein (not sure on the exact amount). I’ve been doing P&B and apples, Greek yogurt when I can stomach it, and lots of cheese sticks. 

ruby696

@rox777 I've also been mixing cottage cheese with Greek yogurt. I can't stand cottage cheese on it's own, but it's tolerable mixed with yogurt.

jkr2019

We don’t have Costco in my area! Which stinks I like it better than Sams club. But I will try the carnation! We also got a shipment of Omaha steaks from my in laws so that I can “beef up”

rox7777

@ruby696 Oh I actually like cottage cheese if it’s mixed with fruit. I’ll have to try that for a snack this week. 

allie456

there is no way I'm getting 100+ grams of protein a day. bah. apples or bananas with peanut butter sounds tasty and doable though.

MH felt the boy baby move for the first timeast night though! that was exciting. the girl is breech with her feet on my bladder so I don't expect her to be able to be felt externally for a few more weeks but the boy is punching under my right ribs. that felt like a big milestone.

ruby696

I'm so paranoid that they'll come early, that I'm trying to bulk then up as much as possible. I know a NICU stay is entirely possible, but I'm trying to do whatever I can to avoid it. My goal is 38 weeks, if at all possible. I'd be happy with 37, too. But shit happens and there's no guarantee, so I'm trying to fatten them up as much as I can! 😆

@allie456 Feeling movement is so exciting! And it gives you so much peace of mind. Sorry you have feet on your bladder though, that sounds unpleasant! 

Eta: Tag

allie456

I mentioned being pregnant at work today in passing (in a conversation with some other women about Frye boots) and they all hadn't guessed! I'm as big as a house! I guess no one pays that much attention to what I look like 😂

jkr2019

Hey @ruby696, are you being scheduled for a NICU tour? My hospital lets high risk moms come for this after 24 weeks. Might help you to get to tour and ask questions, then you’ll be prepared no matter how things turn out. Since we are almost guaranteed to go to NICU we have biweekly meetings with them starting at 24 weeks. 

ruby696

@jkr2019 Hey, I was just thinking about you - how are you feeling?? I haven't heard anything about touring the NICU, but that's a great idea. I'll check with my OB at my next appt. I do have to have weekly NST's at the hospital starting at 20 weeks, so maybe I can do it then.

jkr2019

Thank you for thinking of me @ruby696. I’m ok just feeling so big and tired. We moved in with my parents over the weekend (multiple factors but mainly for more support after the babies are born). After living in our house for five years it was emotional to leave and a big organizational undertaking. So looking forward to getting unpacked and into a new routine. How are you and how are the rest of you ladies? Anyone else having to make big shifts in living arrangements or work arrangements to accommodate multiples?

allie456

@jkr2019 that sounds like a lot of work/disruption but I'm glad you will have help with the babies. Three at once is so much!

I am not planning on making any major shifts right now but was just looking at houses closer to my job, casually. Realistically we aren't going to be able to move for several years at the earliest, but commuting as far as I am every day just isn't going to be sustainable. I'm also going to try to advocate for more telecommuting once the babies get here. We'll see how that goes.

I also started the conversation with work about parental leave and what they offer (it's pretty good). I'm scared that the babies are going to come early and I won't be prepared! 

Also just for some reason noticed this week that the room we are planning to use as the nursery has a popcorn ceiling, so I guess that will have to be remedied before the babies come too in case there is asbestos in there.

ruby696

@jkr2019 I'm glad you'll have your parents help. Hopefully that takes away some of the stress of three infants. I'm doing good. I'm generally nervous about how miserable I'm going to be in 3rd tri, but otherwise all is well. I have a fetal echocardiogram tomorrow and, assuming that's fine, then things are looking really good. No obvious heart issues on the AS, so if there are any findings tomorrow, they would hope be minor. No big changes for me. I wish I could do part time, but my job doesn't really work that way. Even 32 hours a week would be wonderful. Oh well. *sigh*

@allie456 As long as asbestos doesn't get wet, it's fine. You might want to look at whether it's too late to have it removed. I know there are restrictions on installing new carpet with babies, so scraping off asbestos might be a problem, too. I think you can find out if there is asbestos in the popcorn by the year of your house. Maybe it doesn't even have asbestos? That would be a win!

jkr2019

My job told me yesterday that I can take a 6 month leave of absence which was my hope and I feel really happy about it. Some of this will be spent resting before babies arrive, but still some good time with the babies. I’m still torn on how we will handle things after that. One of us has to stay home because 4 kids in childcare would be around 40-50 thousand a year In our area and it gets to a point where it’s like, is it worth it? I make significantly more money than my husband and love my job and the satisfaction I get from my career, and my husband will be a phenomenal stay at home dad. He already does all the laundry and house cleaning and cooking lol! But I think I just feel jealous that he will be home? Everyone assumes I, as the woman, will be the one who quits her job and it’s exhausting justifying why we might choose a different path. Just a lot to decide. 2019 man. It’s a tough time to be a woman! Sorry for the vent session. 

allie456

@jkr2019 I make more money than my husband does too. Neither one of us is quitting because, lucky us, we will have kids in college and daycare at the same time, but I hear you on the cost. He commutes less far than I do too so he handles the cooking. Neither one of us cleans a whole lot though 😂 I feel like if we're lucky enough to have supportive and available partners, then the patriarchy shouldn't have anything to say about it.

@ruby696 my house was built in 1929 and there's asbestos elsewhere so I kind of feel like it's probably my luck that it would be in the ceiling too, but you're right, I'm borrowing trouble about that. Good luck at your echocardiogram tomorrow!

ruby696

@allie456 Yeah, if it was built in 1929, asbestos is pretty likely. I was hoping it was built in the 70's. Maybe talk to someone to see if it's safe to take down at this point? 

allie456

@ruby696 I definitely have to bring someone in to look at it. It's performance review season at work so I have literally not had time to pee but I will start making calls once things calm down.

How did your echocardiograms go? I'm feeling like the (maybe 2) weeks since my last ultrasound is interminably long and I'm dying to see the babies again (next week!)

ruby696

@allie456 It went well, thanks for asking. Both babys' hearts look great. I did almost pass out because the room was so warm and the US machine was putting out so much heat, so that was fun. But otherwise, it was nice to see the babies!

ruby696

So how is everyone doing with their weight gain? I was right on track, but eating is starting to get really hard and I've lost a couple pounds. It's frustrating, but I just can't make myself eat as much as I need to.

pourmeanothermocktail

I'm up too much too fast in the last 3 weeks which puts me a bit ahead of where I want to be. I try to make good choices, but time and kid limited, and if I don't eat every 3 hours I get dizzy. But I really don't want my pelvis to suffer through gaining 50 lbs again, so I'm trying to find a way to slow it

louessbee

I've still not really gained weight. I dropped about 12 pounds in the first trimester, and I've gained that back plus two, so I'm two pounds over my pre-pregnancy weight. I asked my doc about it at my last appointment, and he just said he wouldn't be concerned unless I hadn't gained anything by the next appointment. That's now in two weeks and I'm still plateaued... So we'll see. I was overweight to begin with, and babies both look like they're growing appropriately and are a good weight, so I'm trying to just eat well and keep on keeping on.

@ruby696 Are your targets set by your doctor or from literature or?

allie456

I feel like I have no space in my stomach. If I eat "too much", which varies, I'm then laid out with heartburn and can't sleep.

My scale and my doctor's are a few pounds off from each other but I'm probably in the neighborhood of 10lbs weight gain at almost 23 weeks. Babies were each in the 50th-60th percentile at my AS so I think I'm still ok. But I should be eating more protein and drinking more water.